[Heatwave's first post opens with him talking excitedly and very fast, as though worried that if he doesn't blurt this out immediately he'll forget it. He keeps alternating between clipped briefness like he's trying to give a mission report and...well...babbling.]

[So it's like he's trying to give a really bad mission report.]

I remember how I got here.

[Yes, he sounds horribly pleased about this. He doesn't hold much hope out for his memories, okay.]

It was the Autobots. They had a Stellar Spanner - which is impossible technology. They shouldn't have had it, which is why I had to go talk to it even though it was a glitched thing to do. Sorry, Blitz. Long story short, they caught me and decided to use me to test it. I can't exactly blame them. There is always a danger of finding yourself at the far reaches of the universe if something goes wrong with one, and that's if you're lucky. Or that's what we think, anyway. This is all theoretical. The only mech who had a Stellar Spanner before this was the Old One and he was...well, crazy's putting it lightly.

I freed myself, but it was too late by then. I couldn't get the Spanner to shut down once it had started. Rude, stubborn guy. I was sent through and the next thing I remember, I'm here.

The Stellar Spanner is transwarp technology. I don't know much about it; I'm not a physicist. Part of what I do know I'm not sure I can translate appropriately into any human language. I either don't know enough of human sciences or there is no translation yet, not helped by how the majority of my knowledge isn't from a fellow Cybertronian but solely from what I heard from the Spanner before it attempted to transport me, and my memory isn't as clear in this form. I'm not sure how much I've already forgotten.

[He dissolved into muttering toward the end there, but now he takes a deep breath and speaks up]

Simply: A Stellar Spanner is a method of teleportation across space and time - kind of like the Warp drives that were mentioned earlier, except it involves the..."spaces in between realities." [He hesitates] Not...subspace. It was talking about something else. Sorry. That's a rough translation at best and the Cybertronian glyph it used has fictional connotations, so I'm not sure how to best describe it. The Spanner wasn't exactly clear, either. No one is certain of how it works. I don't think even the Old One did. Slag, I don't think it did, and a machine that doesn't understand it's own function isn't the most stable of sources.

One consistency is that you need two Stellar Spanners to travel, or at least two very similar points; one at the beginning and one at the end. I'm not saying this is the reason for our existence here, but I obviously didn't make it to my intended destination.

[and obviously getting out is of MUCH MORE IMPORTANCE NOW thank you chase.]

( LOCKED TO RATCHET )

Oh, Tranquility. Looks as though the honeymoon's over. We all had a good run-around with our hands in the air wondering what the hell was going on... a week in, no real answers as to what happened, things are getting all Quiet on the Western Front and suddenly - bam. Potential prophecy of impending doom. The long silence about to be broken. Secrets beginning to creep in from the shadows...

It’s all very exciting and a little bit scary, or possibly the other way ‘round depending on who you are, but here’s a bit of advice. Resist the urge to start the whole hands-in-the-air thing again. It’s fun the first time, and necessary in a way, but after a certain point it just becomes counter-productive. We can’t start panicking or killing ourselves over the suspense. Find a book to read. Get to know your neighbors. Play cards or charades or chess. And whatever you do...

[He leans in a touch closer - he seems serious about what he's about to say, but there's a look in his eyes. A knowledge, you might say, if you had to put a word to it.]

...Whatever you do, don’t go trying to hunt those secrets down before their time. Don't think about those parts of the ship the lifts won't take you to. If you find anything that looks like a Big Important Button, do not under any circumstances think about pressing it.

If you see a locked door -- just walk the other way.

[He holds that look for a moment, then glances down as though he’s about to cut the feed - but then glances up again, his mood doing a one-eighty from focused and intense to relaxed and casual.]

--one more thing. It occurs to me that all of us have had something about us changed. On the one end of the spectrum we have the people who only received the number on their arm; on the other end, some of you got the full-body transplant. And in the middle there's people like that nice girl from earlier, with the running, and me... and my sonic screwdriver.

[He holds it up for everyone to see.]

Now I’m not saying this is the same thing as having a biological function altered, although the sonic is a bit organic; all the same, could be something else entirely. I almost hope it is... Some sort of security measure; disable technology foreign to the ship to minimize damage in case of invasion or attack. Which I’d understand, only I’d like to know about it if that’s what’s going on. I’m looking at you -- [And here he smiles at last, and it's almost - flirtatious?] -- Commander Resnik.

[ The video screen shows a little girl of about 11 with shoulder length brown hair. You've probably seen her reading a battered book, maybe waiting by the blue lift or following Robert Capa around (and occasionally even holding his hand). She's wearing the standard uniform, but right now? Right now she's more than a little spooked. ]

Anyone who's listening, this ship...

[ She's been exploring. And maybe a bit of the panic is because she's a little lost, too, and it shows on her face. ]

This ship. Something's not right. Something's going to happen but I don't know when or why--

[She closes her eyes, trying to breathe evenly. ]

Something is wrong.

[It's taken Raven a while to get the courage to talk on the Network, not exactly liking the fact that she didn't know who exactly she was talking to, but whatever. Charles could worry enough for the both of them, and she has questions, regarding her abilities. Plus, she has the distinct advantage of looking like whoever she wants, so. She picks a face she's used before (same coloring as her usual shift, just a brandy new face. and shorter hair. she's always wanted to try shorter hair), and flicks on her device.]

So, this might seem like an odd question, but I was wondering...

Has anyone else been feeling a bit off since they arrived here? Not from whatever they dosed us with to sleep, not that sicky feeling we woke up with, but just. After the fact? Like a noticeable difference in your physical or mental capabilities? [She clears her throat, squints a bit.]

Like me, for instance, I-- [Well, someone didn't think of a pretend mutation to use as an example.] --at home, I could run very fast, extraordinarily fast. Like a cheetah fast. [She makes a face, because this all sounds very stupid right now, she's sure of it.] Meanwhile, here? My whole body seems to feel a little off. I tried to run, but my body is sort of weakened, in a way. I use all my strength to hit the speed I used to be able to, but I can't come close to it.

Has anyone else been experiencing this kind of ..limitation? Or should I be freaking out that whatever they used to knock me out might be having some long-term effects? [Like how right now a sheen of sweat is forming along her brow from the effort it's taking to hold this physical form. Ah.]

Alright, well, I thought -- given that everyone else is doing their, their own little polls, I thought I would put up another one. Very easy, nothing strenuous, I promise, just -- where you come from. Your home, I would say, but not everyone must've been living in their home when they were taken, and -- well.

Planets would be more useful, maybe, now that I think of it. Since the point is, given that we have -- nonhumans, and all sorts of people... and, well, I was thinking we could at the very least see the range of planets that it has to have visited or... been able to mysteriously take people from, before we were brought here. A gauge of its abilities. Obscure as they are.

I can't say I'm from anywhere especial myself -- just Earth. I never thought that that would be only an option.

[a text ETA;] Alright, it's been brought up that this falls a little short, so here are some extra questions. Granted, this isn't mandatory, but if you're aware of any of the answers, having a list may help us in the long run.

Time (and calendar)
Planet
Star system
Relevant cluster

[ It takes some time and positioning, but he finally gets the com-device to where he wants it before double-checking that he's posting to the network at large.

The video starts and others will be able to see a small, blonde man settled in a chair, brows furrowed with a hint of mild concern. ]

Right, yes, hello.

I've been hearing a lot of talk on the network regarding those who have recently been altered to human bodies.

[ His lips pinch a little - to be honest, John is still having a hard time believing this is all real. ]

This is a real issue, especially concerning robotic, um, persons. I understand that those of you who have been affected are pushing for getting your original bodies back, but until that's possible, if that's possible, you need to be able to take care of the one you're currently inhabiting.

My name is John Watson - I'm a medical doctor with twenty years of experience. I'm offering my help to anyone who needs help getting accustomed to their new bodies. Again, I think this is especially important to those who formally had no need to eat or sleep, and may or may not be aware of the particulars of human hygiene or diet.

[ Some humans are this way, too, to be fair. Looking at you, Sherlock. ]

Since this is a personal issue, I'm open to making an individual appointment to see you. You can come see me at my flat or I can come to whatever venue you're comfortable with. Just please contact me and we can figure something out together.

Anyone else who needs medical assistance or advice may also contact me; I'll do what I can to help.

[ He cuts the feed and leans back in his chair to wait and see if good sense overcomes pride. ]

[GREETINGS, NETWORK. Some loser's got his coke-bottle lenses way too close to the camera. Back up, bro, you're fogging the screen, and that is gross.

Turns out he's just trying to make the device stay upright. After a few moments, success! Wheatley (who looks extremely nervous) takes a step away, hovering over the communicator as if he expects it to fall, like it did the past seventeen times.

He is not wearing any clothes.]

Hello! If anyone is there and I'm not just--not just talking to this little black box, which, by the way, could stand to be a little clearer in the "what does this button do" department...

Not that I had any trouble figuring it out. Fiddled around for a bit, and boom, there we go, video feed on. Not a problem. But, you know. Instructions. Just in case anyone's a little...technologically impaired. Couldn't hurt.

[Wait. Where was he?]

Right! Uh…show of hands, if you would, seeing as we've all got hands now. Who's an AI? That's Artificial Intelligence for the aforementioned technologically impaired. Robots count too, I am also a robot.

And--and I know what you humans are thinking; Wheatley, you're not a robot, you're squishy and inefficient just like the rest of us but that, humans, is where you're wrong. One hundred percent robot, right here, just as soon as I get my body back.

Point is, if you see someone in an orange jumpsuit or...or a lab coat, maybe hear them talking about Science or Apertures, or some combination of the two…go ahead and let them know that Wheatley's looking for them and also that...it is important.

[A small pause as he fidgets, suddenly looking that much more uncomfortable.]

Actually. Don't tell them that. Tell me, instead! If--if you meet anyone with that description and. I will go. Find them.

[ There's small click as the feed begins transmitting. Nothing shows up except staticky black, but there are muffled noises in the background that faintly resolve themselves into hurried words—two voices, one male, one female, pitched low. ]

—id this—

—ell is goin—

[ . . . ]

—et’s just … over with.

[ There’s a noise that might either be a sigh or a quick burst of static. ] Fine.( Q & A UNDER THE CUT. )