[text] eridan's guide to role calls

[uncodlyawwesome]

yes that reely fuckin sucked oh no wwe havve to go in gravvity pouches evvery time wwe go through a fuckin jump so wwe dont all fuckin die
didnt anybody listen wwhen wwe got that announcement wwasnt that a fuckin thing they mentioned

anywway im pretty sure i saww some horns floatin around in that sea of confusion earlier but i havve things to do so it wwasnt like i wwas gonna stop by an say hello

[That can probably be safely read as "I didn't know if it was anyone I killed when I flipped out and didn't want to check."]

so uh
i guess i should float the fact that there are other trolls around out there
see wwho it is
if its evven anyone i knoww since thats not alwways a thing here


also i wwas pretty fuckin disappointed that i didnt get a fuckin neww scarf or my cape or fuckin anyfin in my locker
i thought that wwas somethin wwe wwould get like evvery jump wwe get a little more fucking pizzazz on this ship
anyone see a purple cape wwith a gold chain lyin around in case it got misplaced or somefin

Comments

[hauntedbymemory]

I'm afraid personal effects weren't on the list of Things That Should Be Acquired During The Jump.

[It's unsure whether that was sarcasm or not, though given this is Shadow, Eridan should take it with a grain of salt.]

I see you're still here.

1/2

[uncodlyawwesome]

howw should i knoww wwhats supposed to happen in this jump shit i just remember parts a that wwhole spiel a the captains
i wwas just sort a hopin yknoww

an a course im still here wwhere the fuck am i gonna go
trust me im gonna be a fuckin fixture here unless this ship likes sendin people to their deaths

2/2

[uncodlyawwesome]

wwhat do you not wwant me here or somefin

[ponyfabulous]

None of these horns happened to belong to someone who might have originally been a unicorn, did they?

[uncodlyawwesome]

wwhats a unicorn

[zoosmell]

i hope there are other trolls here!
i wonder if vriska is here?
karkat, too, i guess.
it would be like a party except maybe we should have a quiet one or else karkat would get mad.

[uncodlyawwesome]

wwhich one a the humans are you again

kar isnt here
wwell he wwasnt before the jump thing maybe hes here noww wwell just havve to wwait an see i guess
vvris wwas here but i dont knoww if shes still here
some people are sayin other people disappeared durin the jump im not sure

[lovesfaygo]

HoNk :0)

[uncodlyawwesome]

oh
fuckin perfect

PFF html.

[peanutblooder]

hI, bRO!
}:)

I HOPE THIS IS OKAY?

[peanutblooder]

uH,
hI eRIDAN,
i DIDN'T,,,
fIND YOUR CAPE, bUT,
tHERE SEEM TO BE SOME OTHER THINGS,
wHICH MAYBE BELONG TO YOU,
iN MY ROOM?

[uncodlyawwesome]

pretty sure all a my shit is in my room
so your probably fuckin mixed up about wwhatevver youre seein
wwouldnt be fuckin surprisin to me a lil rude but not surprisin that youd mistake some generic shit from this hunk a rusted metal as mine

[vestalvogue]

[There's really no words for the fury she feels at seeing that familiar, obnoxious purple text, and the ridiculous wavy accent, that can only mean Eridan Ampora, alive and well. The question is, what to do about it, now that he's here and she's here and she's got his cape still included in her bloody outfit, tied around the no longer bleeding hole in her torso.

Something short, and simple, and as not-suspicious as she can make it.

This is probably not very. Kanaya is not the best liar.]

Hello Eridan It Is Unsurprising To See You Are Just As Preoccupied With The Same Unimportant Accessories As You Always Are
As I Am Sure You Will Not Cease To Dwell On This Until Your Need Has Been Satisfied I Will Just Come Out And Say
I Know Where It Is

[uncodlyawwesome]

[OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK great douchebag now you've got to deal with Kanaya who probably (uh, obviously) hates you and is probably going to kill you all over again - wait. Calm down. Breathe, it's okay, if Gamzee's acting dumb as shit as usual, then chances are Kan isn't even... from the right timeline! She's probably past Kan, which means you are in the clear. ...At least, that's what Eridan's hopefully thinking.]




oh



uh thats
cool
hi kan

its not like im that obsessed about it its pretty much just the one thing im keepin an eye out for didnt havve any luck last jump so i thought id try again
yknoww just in case
looks like i wwas right to keep tryin though since youvve seen it or somefin

[straightforward]

why do you even care who is here or not???
unless you are planning to kill all of THEM too >:|

[uncodlyawwesome]

holy cripes harley
im not plannin on killin anyone
i wwas just wwonderin howw many people i knoww are on this fuckin ship
jeeze like thats a fuckin crime or somefin noww is that it

an you dont get to come in just throwwin around your ugly green font evverywhere by the fuckin wway
you pretty much havve been avvoidin the carp outta me so until that stops you can go suck on a blowhole twwelve fathoms underwater an hope you can get enough air to fuckin breathe
that is how little i fuckin wwanna hear your jabberin about shit that you dont evven understand

[godseer]

You were the only troll here before the jump?
I'm sure you made a fantastic impression on behalf of trolls to the population here.
Good Lord, if it had been anyone else, I would have been worried.

[uncodlyawwesome]

oh cod damn it

for your fuckin information ivve been a fuckin respectable source a information about trolls since i showwed up here an i think you should go fuck around wwith your stupid fake wwands somewwhere wwhere nobody has to look at your dumb sarcastic face

unless you wwerent being sarcastic but im pretty fuckin sure you dont knoww howw to not do that

[sermonize]

If I may interject? He had not been alone.

[video forever!]

[51stcentury]

[Because Jack's physically incapable of talking to someone without getting to smile at them, if at all possible]

So. How'd you handle the exiting from the gravity couches this time? I looked for you around the locker room, but I guess we just missed each other. [And then Ianto had dragged him off and he had to just hope that he'd catch him again sometime soon instead. Like right now, for example]

[video forever this way too!]

[uncodlyawwesome]

[And who is Eridan to resist responding in video form when someone like Jack opens himself up to it??]

I didn't stick around once I got my shit together. Didn't really wwanna sit around bein' the fuckin' wwelcome party for a bunch'a tools, y'knoww? [He shrugs.] But it wwasn't so bad this time. Could'a been a lot wworse, but at least I wwasn't screamin' hysterical-like this time around.

[purrfectlycute]

[ Equius had told her steer clear of Eridan, but just talking to him shouldn't cause too much harm, right? That's what Nep tells herself anyway. ]

:33 < oh um
:33 < hi ampurra

[uncodlyawwesome]

oh
hi nep

ok i guess wwe got a pretty good group a us comin aboard this time thats cool i guess

text;

[laufeysons]

Trolls?

Re: text;

[uncodlyawwesome]

aw carp i gotta do this ovver again
yes trolls
wwe are an alien race that pretty much fuckin created your univverse
assumin youre human you might not be
if you arent disregard that last part

[sermonize]

At least some of your friends are here, yes?

[uncodlyawwesome]

yeah
its just fuckin great as you can fuckin see they all adore me
just one big grubfuckin family ovver here

video;

[odinsons]

I was unaware Trolls could communicate via written communication so well.

video;

[uncodlyawwesome]

[Here, he's going to video right back at you, you insanely large and foreboding-looking human, so you can see his scrawny gray ass and know you're not thinking about the right kind of trolls.]

Yeah, wwe're full'a fuckin' surprises, aren't wwe?

video, sorry for the late tag, but these two NEED to meet...

[france]

You sound like a very angry little man. Perhaps it is because your keyboard is broken?

[video] NO IT'S OKAY THEY REALLY DO....

[uncodlyawwesome]

[Eridan flips on his camera just to give this guy a deadpan look over the rim of his glasses, before pushing them up his nose.]

My keyboard isn't fuckin' broken. Wwhy does evveryone say that? An' I'm not little, an' I shore as fuck thought I wwas bein' pretty coddamn congenial here!