002 &gt;&gt; [text]

As pointed out in a recent transmission, there are some individuals here who resemble one another. There are others whose worlds are similar to others', while others still have worlds that differ radically.

The following is a survey designed to attempt to determine whose worlds are most similar to whose. As a full disclaimer, I am not a trained sociologist/demographist, nor do I claim to be. My credentials extend no further than merely dabbling in disciplines related to those and having studied the science of writing the census briefly when I was younger. Nevertheless, I believe this may be a useful diagnostic tool.

I would encourage everyone who sees this to take a look at others' responses. If you see something familiar, please discuss with the other individual what that similarity is; from there, please try to determine just how similar/different your worlds are.

This is completely optional.

1. Name:
2. Age:
3. Profession:

4. What is the current year?
5. What you call your homeworld:
6. What you call your home country and city:
7. What you call your species:
8. Are there other sentient species in your place of origin? If so, what are they called?:
9. Does extraterrestrial life exist?:
10. Have people from your world landed on other planets?:
11. Have people from your world opened other dimensions?:
12. Are there people in your world who have "super-powers" - i.e., are they capable of feats of which other people would be completely incapable?:
13. Do you have such a "super-power"?:

14. Name some significant works of literature:
15. Name what you consider the most significant/cutting-edge technological invention of the past decade:
16. What activities do you engage in during your free time?:
17. Who is the greatest military/political leader of all time?:
18. What was the most devastating war of all time?:
19. The leader of your country is:
20. Name some of the greatest scientists in your history:
21. Name some of the greatest philosophers in your history:
22. Name some of the greatest statesmen in your history:

Agree or disagree with the following statements.
22. I trust in science above magic. Agree/disagree
23. I trust my government. Agree/disagree
24. Freedom is more important than security. Agree/disagree
25. Being brought aboard the Tranquility is the worst thing to happen to me. Agree/disagree
26. I wish to return home. Agree/disagree
27. I deserve a voice in what goes on aboard this ship. Agree/disagree

Thank you for your time.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...Right. And all of you come from the same place?

No. Well, GLaDOS and I do, but seriously, mate, don't bother with her, She's mental.

...That's the second time you've said as much. What is so "mental" about her?

She's a homicidal maniac, is what She is.

...Is that so. So will she be a danger to the people on-board?

Not really sure how lethal She is without Her turrets and neurotoxin, but it's probably best to keep an eye on Her. She's got it out for me, I know that much.

Do you believe me yet?

No. But that is not a comment on your credibility.

Okay, fine. What would prove it to you?

[A pause.]

Does your status as an artificial intelligence afford you any particular advantages?

Uh, yeah, the advantage of not being human, which this ship seemed to find a problem.

Edited 2012-06-24 23:17 (UTC)

...Right. I mean can you do anything others wouldn't be able to do.

I am, in fact, an expert hacker. Sort of comes with the territory when you're a computer.

[wheatley, no]

So are plenty of people. And I'm not going to foster illegal activity regardless.

Well now you're just being rude and invasive. How would you like it if I went and called you crazy for claiming to be a human?

If you...called me crazy for claiming to be precisely what each and every scientific test would support me being.

I think you need to learn some proper suspension of disbelief.

I think I've mastered it.

I'm telling you, go ask Topher or Dirk. They'll vouch for me.

Based on what expertise?

Dirk builds robots. Programmed his own AI. Topher's a neurologist. Knows all about...brains. And things.

And they've borne witness to your robotic nature?

[STOP DEMANDING HARD EVIDENCE GOD IT'S LIKE YOU'RE A LAWYER OR SOMETHING]

They'll vouch.

That's not an answer to my question.

Dirk has.

[It's only mostly a lie!]

Really. How so?

(no subject)

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