lчdíα ( вєttєr thαn αnч σthєr αlphα ) mαrtín (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
mathematically) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
ataraxion2012-11-04 02:11 pm
mathematically) wrote in ataraxion2012-11-04 02:11 pm
second molotov cocktail made ☾ ( voice + action, because butt slapping )
[ the feed opens with a bit of a sad sigh coming from it, and it's almost as if lydia sounds like she's going to report that someone left. but for those of you who know how to fake sadness, it might not be nearly as genuine as it could be. and really, as soon as she opens her mouth, it should clear up your confusion on how much she really cares. ]
I realize that it's fascinating that we're all becoming insane, like Neal and whoever that one very depressing anon is, and stressed and we're all still trying to recuperate from whatever that whole thing with the the locked doors and all of us being shoved into the Oxygen Garden and nearly freezing. Have you guys finished cleaning that up, by the way? I also think a jump should be coming up soon. The days may have blurred a little.
All these things are horrible, but, there's a silver lining, because according to Hayley's calendar, that maybe she flipped a date or two around on, today happens to be be Slap a Lawyer on the ass day. Now, personally I know of a few, and I imagine there might be more, because I haven't talked to everyone. The point is, I propose we actually embrace the spirit of this great holiday. [ no lydia, please sound more amused about this. please sound more amused that you're sending everyone to just go slap a bunch of asses. ]
So, I'll get everyone started. I know Edgeworth, number 007 » 114, is one, and so is Mike Ross, number 011 » 002, even though he can't do math at all, and Harvey, his reasonably attractive boss and also number 011 » 001, is one. And Nathan, number 006 » 078. I think might be. At the very least he's a politician and most of the time, those people went to law school. That's four, out of however many there really are. And I know I missed people, but does that mean they're off limits? No, I, Lydia Martin, by the power invested in me by me actually remembering that Hayley even put this on her calendar, hereby declare that everyone who has not gone crazy and might murder people, should go forth and slap a lawyer's ass. And I expect to hear all about it. I might even join in the fun myself.
Go forth and slap away, Tranquility. Might actually do wonders to make the ones of us still having trouble feel a little better.
[ ooc | okay so! this is open to action threads and everything from everyone. i only included edgeworth, mike, harvey and nathan because those are the only lawyers lydia knows for sure are lawyers. this does not mean that anyone who plays a lawyer character other than those four is excluded since this is so open to every lawyer and such on the tranquility. equal opportunity ass slapping, everyone. so yes, go forth and slap and enjoy this. ]
I realize that it's fascinating that we're all becoming insane, like Neal and whoever that one very depressing anon is, and stressed and we're all still trying to recuperate from whatever that whole thing with the the locked doors and all of us being shoved into the Oxygen Garden and nearly freezing. Have you guys finished cleaning that up, by the way? I also think a jump should be coming up soon. The days may have blurred a little.
All these things are horrible, but, there's a silver lining, because according to Hayley's calendar, that maybe she flipped a date or two around on, today happens to be be Slap a Lawyer on the ass day. Now, personally I know of a few, and I imagine there might be more, because I haven't talked to everyone. The point is, I propose we actually embrace the spirit of this great holiday. [ no lydia, please sound more amused about this. please sound more amused that you're sending everyone to just go slap a bunch of asses. ]
So, I'll get everyone started. I know Edgeworth, number 007 » 114, is one, and so is Mike Ross, number 011 » 002, even though he can't do math at all, and Harvey, his reasonably attractive boss and also number 011 » 001, is one. And Nathan, number 006 » 078. I think might be. At the very least he's a politician and most of the time, those people went to law school. That's four, out of however many there really are. And I know I missed people, but does that mean they're off limits? No, I, Lydia Martin, by the power invested in me by me actually remembering that Hayley even put this on her calendar, hereby declare that everyone who has not gone crazy and might murder people, should go forth and slap a lawyer's ass. And I expect to hear all about it. I might even join in the fun myself.
Go forth and slap away, Tranquility. Might actually do wonders to make the ones of us still having trouble feel a little better.
[ ooc | okay so! this is open to action threads and everything from everyone. i only included edgeworth, mike, harvey and nathan because those are the only lawyers lydia knows for sure are lawyers. this does not mean that anyone who plays a lawyer character other than those four is excluded since this is so open to every lawyer and such on the tranquility. equal opportunity ass slapping, everyone. so yes, go forth and slap and enjoy this. ]
[voice] 1/4
[voice] 2/4
[voice] 3/4
[voice] 4/4 and open for tagging and action!
[Edgeworth will be hiding in his room most of the day...but he'll answer the door, because he is self-defeating, and he will go to the bathroom and to the kitchens. And he might respond to requests to meet. He is dumb.]
not here
not here
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voice; SORRY NOT SORRY
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voice; whoops, my fingers slipped
voice; YES GOOD
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NEVER SORRY
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video; (also open for action shenanigans here)
[wow harvey your priorities]
(( ooc: harvey is in the rec room in the passenger quarters and for the first time, wearing his jumpsuit as opposed to his normal three piece suit. please smack him on the ass. ))
ACTION FUFUFUFUFU
it's purely accidental that he comes across Harvey at all (because he was on his way to coffee), but when he spots him, Jim's mouth splits into a devious smile.
he doesn't sneak up on him, exactly, but he does approach him from behind. so when he's close enough, he brings his hand back and cracks his palm, solidly, against the curve of the man's ass.]
Hey, Specter. How's it going?
oh no kirk whyyyyy
you like it don't lie
i do, unashamedly
just remember you asked for it
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voice;
[ lydia no. ]
I also haven't seen your butt. So you might have a chance to become just incredibly attractive.
voice;
voice;
ninja action because i FEEL LIKE IT
and she always has had a competitive streak, so why not?
...and mike's maybe boyfriend or not, it's not like this isn't an official holiday. and harvey's ass is nice, so: slap.
(if it seems like maybe there's no human way someone could sneak up on you that fast or that quietly, harvey: correct sir. she is a filthy rotten cheater right now.) ]
One down-- nice butt, by the way.
ninja action is always good, hehe
/attacks you with it WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT etc etc etc
video|
I like you.
voice|
[ a beat. ]
Think the lawyers are going to try and argue that I need to be sent to the brig for assault?
video|
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video + action;
What.
[ HE REALLY WISHED HE WAS IN HIS ROOM RIGHT NOW so have a mike, in any random hallway, fumbling with his communicator and looking around like something's about to attack him. it's probably getting caught on video too. HE JUST WANTED TO GO THE BATHROOM, OKAY? ]
action;
I wonder how many people would actually smack you on the ass if they knew you weren't a real lawyer.
[nobody around, he made sure to do this with nobody around. it's in his best interest to keep mike's secret too.]
action;
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action; because Mike's life is too easy
Oh.
Well.
She's probably not going to smack him but well she doesn't have to tell him that. She just looks at him and waves.]
action; SOBBING
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Re: action;
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[ LYDIA, INNOCENT DOESN'T WORK WHEN YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID. ]
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Audio
NO.
Either way, Manfred sounds really pissed.]
Lydia Martin, is it?
I will remember you.
Assault me or my student and you will rue the day you even made such a ridiculous suggestion.
((OOC: Manfred is probably around the library or something. Please feel free to smack him on the ass.))
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[video]+[action?]
[ Stay calm, Nathan. It's just a bit of fun, right?
- - - -
None the less he still has jobs to do.
To pick him up in the oxygen gardens choose option #1
- It's Sunday so he's holding chapel--advise not interrupting his service, or stomping all over quiet time, but you can always get him after.
To get him at holodeck 2 turn, choose option #2
There are preparations to make for the council in a couple of days, and he can't ditch that and trade it to someone else. He will be found here later in the day, moving chairs into stacks in the corridors.
If you really have a death wish, choose option #3
Nathan will be back in Comms for the rest of the evening, exhausted and probably very annoyed. Slap the dragon at your own risk.
Warning: Slappers may be forced into manual labour or quiet reflection, depending on where they are. ]
[voice]
[ a beat. ]
I might be wrong on the president's powers, though. Who knows.
[voice]
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action; I choose door #1
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video;
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NO.
I suggest you don't even bother looking.
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video | action;
Luckily it wasn't something he mentioned much so he assumes he is in the clear but feel free to find him in one of the hallways or in the library]
video; WHICH IS OPEN TO ALL BY THE WAY
Sorry but not sorry because you are also a lawyer and if I'm going down so are you.
[ SO THERE. IT'S OUT THERE ]
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» audio
( text )
ps you okay?
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ps totally fine, btw. you?
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voice;
[she's terribly, terribly amused. and thinking about slapping. maybe.]
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voice; i am so sorry for how late this is
voice; it's absolutely fine!
text;
Alas for me, that my era is one with only amateur orators and jurisconsults. I have long believed there would be many advantages to allowing a professional class of advocates to practice law, but I confess I did not have the foresight to imagine such a holiday among them.
Io Lawyer-Arse-Slapping Day!
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I assure you sir that this is not a remotely legitimate holiday.
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text; gmail is the worst hi this is really late and i'm sorry
no worries! i recently worked my way through TW and Lydia's one of my faves, so I am keen for CR.
text;
You missed a lawyer. His name is Phoenix Wright and his number is 009 » 093. He's a defense attorney so he ought to be slapped twice as hard and twice as often.
Were you the one who originally suggested this idea to that person who posted the calendar?
THREADJACKTION
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text;
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text; gmail is currently my mortal enemy and i'm truly sorry for how late this is
text; no worries, i will backtag into the sun!
[voice]
Lay off the lawyers, will ya?!
[He's serious. Dead serious. And angry for his friends. Aaaaand possibly suffering from a little mask hangover.]
[voice] dear gmail, i like how you misplaced my notif for this HI I'M SORRY ABOUT HOW LATE THIS IS
And I get along perfectly well with Edgeworth, who by the way, doesn't really strike me as an Edgey.
There's nothing wrong with an innocent bit of fun with the lawyers. It's not like I named just him anyway.
[voice] IT'S OKAY look at me I'm also late sob
video »
[ beat. ]
So do we get scorecards?
voice »
[ beat and she sounds so amused. ]
I thought about it, but then I couldn't exactly decide who should get the highest point value or if I should assign different points for different slaps.
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