mathematically: (pic#5013618)
lчdíα ( вєttєr thαn αnч σthєr αlphα ) mαrtín ([personal profile] mathematically) wrote in [community profile] ataraxion2012-11-04 02:11 pm

second molotov cocktail made ☾ ( voice + action, because butt slapping )

[ the feed opens with a bit of a sad sigh coming from it, and it's almost as if lydia sounds like she's going to report that someone left. but for those of you who know how to fake sadness, it might not be nearly as genuine as it could be. and really, as soon as she opens her mouth, it should clear up your confusion on how much she really cares. ]

I realize that it's fascinating that we're all becoming insane, like Neal and whoever that one very depressing anon is, and stressed and we're all still trying to recuperate from whatever that whole thing with the the locked doors and all of us being shoved into the Oxygen Garden and nearly freezing. Have you guys finished cleaning that up, by the way? I also think a jump should be coming up soon. The days may have blurred a little.

All these things are horrible, but, there's a silver lining, because according to Hayley's calendar, that maybe she flipped a date or two around on, today happens to be be Slap a Lawyer on the ass day. Now, personally I know of a few, and I imagine there might be more, because I haven't talked to everyone. The point is, I propose we actually embrace the spirit of this great holiday. [ no lydia, please sound more amused about this. please sound more amused that you're sending everyone to just go slap a bunch of asses. ]

So, I'll get everyone started. I know Edgeworth, number 007 » 114, is one, and so is Mike Ross, number 011 » 002, even though he can't do math at all, and Harvey, his reasonably attractive boss and also number 011 » 001, is one. And Nathan, number 006 » 078. I think might be. At the very least he's a politician and most of the time, those people went to law school. That's four, out of however many there really are. And I know I missed people, but does that mean they're off limits? No, I, Lydia Martin, by the power invested in me by me actually remembering that Hayley even put this on her calendar, hereby declare that everyone who has not gone crazy and might murder people, should go forth and slap a lawyer's ass. And I expect to hear all about it. I might even join in the fun myself. 

Go forth and slap away, Tranquility. Might actually do wonders to make the ones of us still having trouble feel a little better.


[ ooc | okay so! this is open to action threads and everything from everyone. i only included edgeworth, mike, harvey and nathan because those are the only lawyers lydia knows for sure are lawyers. this does not mean that anyone who plays a lawyer character other than those four is excluded since this is so open to every lawyer and such on the tranquility. equal opportunity ass slapping, everyone. so yes, go forth and slap and enjoy this. ]
jurisimpudent: (contemptuous)

[voice] 1/4

[personal profile] jurisimpudent 2012-11-04 08:57 pm (UTC)(link)
[What an interesting post from that slightly alarming young lady, Lydia. An interesting...]
jurisimpudent: (i tried)

[voice] 2/4

[personal profile] jurisimpudent 2012-11-04 08:57 pm (UTC)(link)
[...post...]
jurisimpudent: (shocked)

[voice] 3/4

[personal profile] jurisimpudent 2012-11-04 08:58 pm (UTC)(link)
What - you...Young woman -
lawyer: (pic#4842259)

video; (also open for action shenanigans here)

[personal profile] lawyer 2012-11-04 08:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Normally I would take umbrage at "reasonably attractive" but considering that I've been wearing the same suit for the past month, I'm not surprised.

[wow harvey your priorities]

(( ooc: harvey is in the rec room in the passenger quarters and for the first time, wearing his jumpsuit as opposed to his normal three piece suit. please smack him on the ass. ))
jurisimpudent: (rage)

[voice] 4/4 and open for tagging and action!

[personal profile] jurisimpudent 2012-11-04 08:58 pm (UTC)(link)
You - nngh! Take this down at once!

[Edgeworth will be hiding in his room most of the day...but he'll answer the door, because he is self-defeating, and he will go to the bathroom and to the kitchens. And he might respond to requests to meet. He is dumb.]
Edited 2012-11-04 21:08 (UTC)
entrapments: (||coalition)

video|

[personal profile] entrapments 2012-11-04 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Any waffling I'd done about my opinion of your character, admittedly based on little more than passing conversation and mutual acquaintance has been officially eclipsed.

I like you.
fraud: (pic#5077818)

video + action;

[personal profile] fraud 2012-11-04 09:01 pm (UTC)(link)
[ DANGER, WILL ROBINSON! ]

What.

[ HE REALLY WISHED HE WAS IN HIS ROOM RIGHT NOW so have a mike, in any random hallway, fumbling with his communicator and looking around like something's about to attack him. it's probably getting caught on video too. HE JUST WANTED TO GO THE BATHROOM, OKAY? ]
atmnumber0001: (Sweating)

Audio

[personal profile] atmnumber0001 2012-11-04 09:03 pm (UTC)(link)
[Manfred doesn't care about the rest of the post. He just cares that it's apparently Slap a Lawyer on the Ass Day.

NO.

Either way, Manfred sounds really pissed.]


Lydia Martin, is it?

I will remember you.

Assault me or my student and you will rue the day you even made such a ridiculous suggestion.

((OOC: Manfred is probably around the library or something. Please feel free to smack him on the ass.))
Edited 2012-11-04 21:04 (UTC)
goldshirt: (her name is nyota? ✬)

ACTION FUFUFUFUFU

[personal profile] goldshirt 2012-11-04 09:04 pm (UTC)(link)
[Kirk sees the post and can't help but laugh at it. it's nice, that despite all the shit going down (and there's a lot of it, from what he found out in Engineering, to Neal and Oxford posting on the network), the kids at least can find something fun to do. and, well, Jim might need something a little lighter to distract himself with.

it's purely accidental that he comes across Harvey at all (because he was on his way to coffee), but when he spots him, Jim's mouth splits into a devious smile.

he doesn't sneak up on him, exactly, but he does approach him from behind. so when he's close enough, he brings his hand back and cracks his palm, solidly, against the curve of the man's ass.]


Hey, Specter. How's it going?
heltersskelter: (h u n t e r | from the inside)

Audio

[personal profile] heltersskelter 2012-11-04 09:05 pm (UTC)(link)
What's wrong, daddy lawyer? Afraid of a little fun?
cargojet: (Profile of a villain)

[video]+[action?]

[personal profile] cargojet 2012-11-04 09:06 pm (UTC)(link)
I think I remember vetoing against this motion the first time it was suggested.

[ Stay calm, Nathan. It's just a bit of fun, right?

- - - -

None the less he still has jobs to do.

To pick him up in the oxygen gardens choose option #1
- It's Sunday so he's holding chapel--advise not interrupting his service, or stomping all over quiet time, but you can always get him after.
To get him at holodeck 2 turn, choose option #2
There are preparations to make for the council in a couple of days, and he can't ditch that and trade it to someone else. He will be found here later in the day, moving chairs into stacks in the corridors.
If you really have a death wish, choose option #3
Nathan will be back in Comms for the rest of the evening, exhausted and probably very annoyed. Slap the dragon at your own risk.

Warning: Slappers may be forced into manual labour or quiet reflection, depending on where they are.
]
player_not_slayer: (Oh really?)

video;

[personal profile] player_not_slayer 2012-11-04 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
We got any hot female lawyers on this ship? if there are, I am so down with this.
Edited 2012-11-04 21:07 (UTC)
lawyer: (pic#4843774)

action;

[personal profile] lawyer 2012-11-04 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
[harvey's going to appear out of nowhere, actually wearing one of the jumpsuits the tranquility gave him. he still looks good in it, but he'd rather not have people's grubby hands all over his suit trousers.]

I wonder how many people would actually smack you on the ass if they knew you weren't a real lawyer.

[nobody around, he made sure to do this with nobody around. it's in his best interest to keep mike's secret too.]
atmnumber0001: (Irritable)

[personal profile] atmnumber0001 2012-11-04 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Our definitions of "fun" clearly differ.
vindicating: (pic#4063216)

video | action;

[personal profile] vindicating 2012-11-04 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
That was switched to today? [What. When was this even decided?

Luckily it wasn't something he mentioned much so he assumes he is in the clear but feel free to find him in one of the hallways or in the library]
Edited 2012-11-04 21:08 (UTC)
atmnumber0001: (I'm so sorry I just love your icons okay...) (ARRGGGGH)

Audio

[personal profile] atmnumber0001 2012-11-04 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
[Oh no you did not just suggest that. Stay away from Manfred's daughter you asshole.]

NO.

I suggest you don't even bother looking.
majestyofthethrone: (Sera - almost pleasure)

action; because Mike's life is too easy

[personal profile] majestyofthethrone 2012-11-04 09:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[She just came around the corner in time to watch him fumble with his communicator, so she checks her, and....

Oh.

Well.

She's probably not going to smack him but well she doesn't have to tell him that. She just looks at him and waves.]
heltersskelter: (p l a y m a t e | but god i like it)

[personal profile] heltersskelter 2012-11-04 09:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Dude, we're in space and the ship is trying to kill us.

Take a chill pill.
fraud: (pic#5077827)

action;

[personal profile] fraud 2012-11-04 09:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[ aaahh harvey, his lord, his savior, his better half-- wait. whatever, approaching and getting all near him and making sure the comm is tucked away safely in his hoodie oh nooo. ]

My butt doesn't feel safe anymore.
atmnumber0001: (Heheh)

not here

[personal profile] atmnumber0001 2012-11-04 09:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[Have a nice butt-squeeze from your darling mentor.]
fraud: (pic#5077827)

action; SOBBING

[personal profile] fraud 2012-11-04 09:12 pm (UTC)(link)
[ THERE IS A JUMP and he clutches his comm to his chest, staring at her in horror. ]

My butt.

[ that's not a complete sentence, mike ]
atmnumber0001: (Default)

[personal profile] atmnumber0001 2012-11-04 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, and this would be much easier to deal with if people weren't going around advocating assault.
jurisimpudent: (i tried)

not here

[personal profile] jurisimpudent 2012-11-04 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
[oooh mr von karma oooooh]
player_not_slayer: (Smirkity)

video;

[personal profile] player_not_slayer 2012-11-04 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
[Smiiiiiiirk.]

Oh, so there are. Sweet, I so gotta find one.
lawyer: (pic#4845010)

oh no kirk whyyyyy

[personal profile] lawyer 2012-11-04 09:14 pm (UTC)(link)
[harvey just wanted a cup of coffee too, away from all the madness but clearly madness was intent on following him.

of course he was on high alert for people touching his behind but he was not expecting kirk of all people so he jumps up and tenses just a bit, eyes wide open and dropping his cup. thank god it was plastic and empty.]


I was unaware you cared, Captain.

[he's trying very hard to keep his voice calm and level]

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