001: text;

[selfkismesis]

GIVE YOURSELVES A PAT ON THE BACK.
JUST QUIT WHATEVER MUNDANE AND UNDOUBTEDLY RETARDED ACT YOU'RE FUCKFIRST IN THE MIDDLE OF COMMITTING, REACH AROUND, AND JUST PAT PAT PAT.
YOU (AND BY "YOU" I AM REFERRING TO WHOEVER CAN READ THIS WHO MAY OR MAY NOT BE INVOLVED IN THE BULLSHIT OCCURRING THIS VERY MOMENT) DESERVE IT.
YOU'VE CLIMBED THIS WHOLE MOUNTAIN OF CREATIVITY AND BRAINSPONGE FAMINES, YOU HAVE EMBRACED THE DRAMATIC SCENERY, AND WHISPERED A STOUT BUT AFFIRMING "YES" INTO THE INFINITE DEPTHS OF METAPHORICAL VICTORY.
YOU ARE THE CHAMPION, MY FRIENDS.
YOU HAVE GONE WHERE NO MAN, WOMAN, TROLL, OR BABBY HAS EVER DARED TO GO BEFORE.



YOU HAVE TAKEN ME
KARKAT MOTHERFUCKING VANTAS
FROM A SPACE STATION
AND IN A FIT OF UNTOLD BRILLIANCE THAT WILL BE SUNG ABOUT FOR EONS TO COME
YOU HAVE MOVED ME TO A GODDAMN SPACE *SHIP*.

I AM STRAIGHT UP SHITHIVE ASTOUNDED.
WE ARE STILL IN SPACE.
IS IT THE SAME SPACE???
IS THERE SUCH A THING AS "SAME SPACE"???
WILL I EVER NOT BE STUCK ON A HUNK OF METAL IN SPACE????
WE JUST DON'T FUCKING KNOW.

GOD, I HATE SPACE.






SO BASICALLY
GREAT JOB, YOU USELESS PIECES OF DECOMPOSING SHIT.
COMMENT HERE, TELL ME A LITTLE ABOUT YOUR SUPERFLUOUS EXISTENCE (SIX WORDS OR LESS), AND ALLOW ME TO TAILOR MY PROJECTILE VOMITING TO FIT YOUR SPECIAL AND UNIQUE NEEDS.

Comments

[testgasm]

[SUDDENLY, YELLING.]

I'M NOT MORONIC.

[selfkismesis]

[ wow that sure was some yelling there ]

DISAGREED
BY PRACTICALLY EVERYONE.

[testgasm]

[you did it, Karkat

you found the m-word

combolations]

False, actually. Survey says not a moron. You might want to get your facts straight, before you start tossing them about.

[selfkismesis]

[ oh happy day ]

I'M ABOUT A MILLION% SURE THAT THE FIRST QUALIFICATION FOR NOT BEING DUMB AS SHIT IS TO KNOW HOW A CONVERSATION WORKS.
YOU ALREADY PROVED THAT THAT SIMPLISTIC THOUGHT PROCESS IS BEYOND YOU.
ANYTHING MORE COMPLEX MIGHT BLOW YOUR MIND.

[testgasm]

As if you can even call this a conversation! I was perfectly willing to be helpful, but nooooo, you've got to be all impolite, with your gray text and your implied shouting, not listening to a word I say!

[selfkismesis]

HELPFUL?
YOU WOULDN'T KNOW HELPFUL IF IT KICKED YOU IN YOUR RIDICULOUSLY HIDEOUS VOICE BOX.
HELPFUL ISN'T YOU GENTLY FONDLING YOUR ALTRUISM GLANDS THROUGH THE EMBARRASSING EXCUSE OF A MASK YOU CALL YOUR FACE WHILE COMMENTING ON MY CULTURAL EXPECTATIONS OF A TYPING QUIRK.
HELPFUL ISN'T PROMPTING ME TO TAKE THE QUERY SQUIGGLE OUT TO PASTURE AND PUT IT DOWN LIKE A RABID BARKBEAST.
HELPFUL ISN'T ANYTHING YOU COULD EVER POSSIBLY CONCEIVE AS HELPFUL.
HELPFUL IS THE DIRECT OPPOSITE OF ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER DONE IN YOUR MISERABLE LIFE EVER, TO THE POINT OF RECITING EVERY SENTENCE YOU HAVE EVER SAID, EVERY ACTION YOU HAVE EVER MADE, AND EVERY STEP YOU HAVE EVER TAKEN BACKWARDS AND UPSIDE DOWN.
THAT'S THE ONLY WAY TO CORRECT THE MULTITUDES OF RETARDATION YOU'VE INFLICTED ON EVERYONE AROUND YOU.

AND SO

[testgasm]

[selfkismesis]

[ how do i Like a post on dreamwidth ]