ataraxion | [video] 002

[video] 002

_{[ Hi Tranquility. Are you ready dor a mouthfull? Cause you're getting it. Feed clicks on to show America, apparently just out of his jumpsuit and in his boxers. He's just seated on his bed, hair tousled a bit, evidently not very concerned about his appearance even though he's addressing who knows how many people. He's too lazy to get up. He's eating out of a bag of chips that he found aboard the ship when exploring the facilities; that is what he spent all day doing.
Giving the communicator a bit of a salute, he says something incoherent with his mouth full before flashing a grin. ]}

HEEEEEY YOU GUYS. EVENING, DUDES, THIS IS YOUR HERO SPEAKING. GOT SOME IMPORTANT TO SAY. You better listen up, I've also got a surprise for you all! _{[ He adjusts his posture, throat clearing. ]}

Hahaha, righto! SO! If you are unfamiliar with EARTH, or whatever, I've been awesomely awesome as usual and drew myself a map for you dudes so you can understand the very, VERY, important things about the Earth I've graciously drawn out for you. Yeah, I'm a nice guy! Hahahaaha! So, here we go! It looks something like THIS, are you ready?? Tony, bro, if you will please!

_{[ A little grey alien jumps into view, holding up a piece of paper which looks like this: ]}

HAHAA. RIGHT, so that totally accurate cause I drew it! Everything circled is MINE, and I pointed out my dick cause it has the HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH! This is for you slackers that didn't pay attention to American geography class for whatever reason!! Hahaha, so! On the subject of my dick, _{[ pointing to the map as he say all of this ]} I'll just segway as to why THIS IS MY DICK. If you don't know what the shit I'm talking about, I'M GONNA EXPLAIN. _{[ A brief pause to stuff some chips in his mouth and he speaks, lips smacking before swallowing. ]}

--So, I figure I'll be the heroic one and take responsibility here. I'm gonna break something to you all just in case you hear country names being thrown around and you're all: Oh my GOD WHAT THE SHIT!?!? I THOUGHT YOU WERE ALFRED, OH GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING.
RIIIIIIIGHT, chill out, here's the low-down. Some of us you may talk to are the embodiments of our respectable countries we're being called. We're like the spirits of our countries like some crazy Miyazaki film or something. SO YEAH YOU HEARD ME. YEAH IT'S MIND-BLOWING, INNIT? BUT YOU KNOW THIS WHOLE THING IS MIND-BLOWING,. I MET CAPTAIN KIRK WHO IS SUPPOSED TO BE FICTIONAL, SO WHATEVER, DUDE. And we have human names just for kicks, and when we gotta use them for living out normal life shit or something. [ He picks at his nose slightly before continuing. ]
Uh, okay, RIGHT SOMETHING COOL: Apparently people also can be from different timelines and alternate dimensions and it's REALLY FUCKING FAR OUT AND AWESOME! BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT BESIDES THE FACT YOU MAY BE FROM OUR WORLD, OR YOU MAY NOT.

Anyway, back on the subject of us, basically we're all really, really important and have a degree of immortality and super strength and stamina last I checked! The citizens and the government make us up, parts of the landmass coincide with parts on our body, etccc, etccc, yadda yadda. So far there are only four of us I've seen on this ship! We're hundreds of years old, we age differently, we die differently, we've fought in wars, we've done responsibilities that you don't even KNOW OF, MAN. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.

OKAY SOOOOO, ONTO THE INTROS I'll introduce!
If you see a girl that thinks she has a dick, has long hair with a flower in it sometimes, that's Hungary! Maybe you know her as Elizaveta. F.Y.I, J.S.Y.K HISTORY LESSON: She used to be married to this dude named Austria, or Roderich if you give a shit about European history, which I really don't!! Haha! He's here and he has glasses and is like a pansy. They're both from the 1950's for some reason! WHICH REALLY BLOWS MY MIND CAUSE HOLY SHIT IT'S LIKE BACK TO THE FUTURE.
Hahaha! Right! And the other one is Natalia, or Belarus. If you meet a crazy lady that wants to marry her brother, that's her and you should just.. be careful. She's former USSR and scary as shit. She's from the year crazy and will ALWAYS be there. Basically I gotta say about her; just be cautious, even if she's hot. Don't give into her hotness, she'll lure you in like a she-devil and propaganda your shit out.

_{[ A bit of laughter, sounding a bit nervous if anything, he throws his head back. ]}

HAHAHA! SO ANYWAY, DUDES. There's one of us for every country! Isn't that kind of AWESOME?? Other country guys that I haven't seen are England. You can tell by his massive eyebrows and Simon Cowell I-hate-my-life personality that he is England and I kicked his ass in the Revolution. Juuuuust thought I'd throw that out there for you people that aren't familiar with anything pertaining to America. Never try anything he cooks, and he hallucinates fairies and shit. Just ignore that; he's loony--
If you see a guy with a fat face, fat nose, fat ass, fat stomach, that's Russia, or Ivan! He's stupid and you shouldn't like him. Why? Well, he's a Communist power hungry dick and I beat his ass in the Cold War! [ no you didn't ] Yeah, I know I'm cool.
Oh! And one more I'll talk about. if you see a dude that looks like lady with blond hair and a thick accent, you should just run! That's the Frenchie, or Francis, and he smells like garlic and he's basically a pervert. Aaaaaall you gotta know about him. Those are just a few of us! But like I said, I've only seen Hungary, Austria, and Belarus.

_{[ A beat, he takes a deep breath. ]}

SO LAY IT ON ME, DUDES AND DUDETTES. Am I making myself clear? Get it? Map of the earth? We're the embodiments of that? We're the SHIT COOOOOOL AWESOME? DISNEYWORLD IS ON MY DICK???

HAAHAA, SO. If you have any questions regarding this, feel free to contact me!
This is Alfred F. Jones, the United States of America......
OVER AND OUT!!!!

_{[ THE MOST CONFUSING EXPLANATION EVER, BUT HERE YOU GO. ]}

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

_{[ So America hears somebody knocking at the door. Here, he's actually going to do something smart, seeing as he suffers from paranoia for himself a bit too much. The nation slips off of his bed, taking his gun with him and padding over to the door. Cracking it open, he peers out. ]}

....

OH SHIT.
Dude, Belarus, what are you doing here?
....
Damn, you look sexy in that outfit, just saying.

[The gun doesn't worry her much -- then again she is a little apathetic toward America's paranoia, stupidly or not. She gives him a nonplussed look, crossing her arms]

Careful, Amerika. I may work my she-devil ways on you... [nods] I am having a word with you. Privately.

[This is her 'back on up' demand]

_{[ NOPE.jpg
He tenses up, teeth gritting, holding the gun up but not pointing it at anything. ]}

NUH UH. you just wanna seduce me with your ways, have sex with me cause I'm awesome, then duct tape me together while forcing me to watch propaganda footage.

---I AIN'T FALLING FOR IT.
I know I helped you in the past, but that's just cause Russia was being a dick to you, because he is a dick.

[huffs, hands going to her hips] You could not handle me, child. In case you have short term memory loss -- or a lack of brain cells in the first place, we are in space. I do not have duct tape OR propaganda.

[flatly] I also lack the desire to sleep with you. Now put the gun down and let me in.

_{[ His nose wrinkles, and he does lower the gun, but still side eying you. ]}

---Then why do you wanna come in with me, huh?
WHERE THERE'S A BED.... a good place to be seduced.
HUH? HUH?????
HUUUUH??

Just tell me what you want, dude!

Idiot, I wanted to speak with you in private. Your quarters are best.

[A purposeful look] Like you would be willing to come to MINE. Now. Know that I am trying to do this as peaceful as possible; it is your fault if violence breaks out.

[smoooothly attempts to glide on in] You will stop speaking ill of myself and Vanya. He is not responsible for our situation and I do not appreciate being called crazy to a ship full of strangers.

_{[ He just... kind of doesn't do anything as she slips inside, watching her carefully. He shuts the door once she is in, blinking a few times and taking a breath to calm himself a bit.

There are papers scattered everywhere in his room, along with some trash from assorted things. Tony is perched on the bed, seeming to be drawing something on a paper as well. He watches Belarus carefully. ]}

Yeah, I know, Tony. Don't mind us.

...[eyes Tony, then America] Is that all he says? Ah. Nevermind-- I am guessing that is unimportant. [toes a bit of rubbish with a disapproving look] You already managed to trash your room. Color me impressed.

_{[ Arms are crossed as he leans against the door, watching her carefully. ]}

Yeah, so what of it. It's my room and I'll do what I want.
By the way, all of those papers are really important, so don't you dare take any of them.

_{[ He runs a hand through his hair, hiking up the elastic band on his boxers a bit before huffing. ]}

You can tell me why you're here anytime now, you know.

[Princess is just going to give you a 'yeah right' look] I have no use for your stick figure pornography, Amerika. [Eye roll]

I thought I told you--
Stop talking ill of my brother and myself. I am not crazy simply because I do not fawn over you.

_{[ A beat. ]}

--Is that it--?

See, it is a simple enough request but I am asking YOU to fulfill it.

So it is damned near impossible, I am sure. [almost sweetly] I will sew your mouth shut if you persist.

Is that being better?

_{[ ... ]}

Okay.
But you still came here in person to say that to me. That has to mean something.

Also, those aren't porno sketches; I put those under my mattress. They're important information cause I've been working hard to figure this out.

[annoyed] Are you disappointed I was not some nameless girl coming over to talk about your dick? Pig.

Dare I ask what you have figured out?

I don't mind sharing with you because I'm a nice guy.

_{[ He pushes himself off of the door by merely just moving his entire body and begins to gather a few papers. ]}

--So that was you, huh? Interesting way to invite yourself over.
_{[ He glances over his shoulder. ]}

Basically, stuff I tell you-- should be kept between us for now, got it?

If anyone takes your rambling for serious I will not be having to worry about having many to gossip at. [sniff] Thanks to you being nice, yes?

[She refused to answer the middle bit, face falling back to expressionless] Go on then.

Right. Well. Here is one sheet.

_{[ America says, walking over to her and holding it out to her. ]}

I'm in the process of organizing them by what I think has the most important information on it.

[taking the sheet without a word, she stepped back enough to sit on the edge of the bed at a respectable distance from America's alien pal; squinting at his scrawl]

I've heard there are only two official crew members from others -- which seems strange considering the size? [a pause] What makes you say that here are potential threats on this ship though?

It is being an honest question...

One can never be too safe, Belarus. You gotta be prepared for threats everywhere.. cause when you let your guard down.. that's when they get ya.
Plus... sci-fi movies. You know, all that.

_{[ He hands her another sheet. ]}

_{[ Almost instantly, he realizes he handed her the wrong paper and his cheeks flush a vibrant red, and he snatches it back. ]}

THAT IS NOTHING....

_{[ He puffs up his cheeks and crumbles up that paper, handing her another one from off of his table. ]}

THERE. That's, uh... that's what I meant to show you.

[She took the second offered sheet, thinking nothing of it. It'd be more scribbled text with guesses about life aboard the Tranquility and nothing...

else. Natalia ogled the sheet for the second or two it was in her possession, the seam of her lips drawing tighter until America was left with a rather sever scowl; wordlessly taking the third sheet with a bit more force than necessary; accent thick when she did feel herself able to without slinging curses at him]

So-- I see you bypassed the ship's suits. Interesting, albeit unattainable fantasy you are having there...

We are orbiting a moon, apparently. In other words, we are going nowhere. [If the boy's notes were telling of anything. She sighs at the mention of Charlie Sheen. A.D.D.]

I am not going to offer myself for any experiments on immortality. Clear?

_{[ He blinked a few times. Phew. At least she isn't making him more embarrassed. The red color escapes his face finally. ]}

--We're orbiting a moon? How are you certain of that?
And of course not. I, uh.
I wouldn't want you to.

[You just wait until you walk in on her one day-- it's inevitable. She will make you rue the day. Until then, you get this only marginally awkward moment that she will remember for later. Handing back the paper, Natalia shrugged]

I had a certain conversation with a pale ginger child that was supposedly an intelligent piece of A.I. before coming here -- he was the first to mention the two and the moon we are orbiting. No specifics, however, I am having no belief that machinery would be dishonest, da?

[and since she's being verbose, she will close with STRAIGHT TO THE POINT]

You, however, have reasons to be dishonest. [a teasing smile --run for the hills boy] You would love to play target practice with me.

I would not. Sure, there are things about you I disagree with, but you're not Russia whom I would never save unless my boss forced me.

If I did, I would have shot at you and not even let you in my room. But, until you give me legit threats other than your typical threateningness...

I'm saving and protecting you like everybody else on this ship.

Edited 2011-12-14 05:52 (UTC)

perma-action!

So little 'action' you mean.

8)

Re: 8)

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

1.3

2.3

3.3

You jelly.

no subject

no subject

no subject