( 005 ) video ✶ they say what you lose only turns into gold is that what this luck's gonna bring

[unparental]

[ admitting she's a vampire hasn't been topping jenna's list of priorities on-ship. she's spent more time as a vampire aboard the tranquility than she did at home-- she still thinks of herself as human, for crying out loud. it doesn't matter if she likes garlic on her pizza and she can still primp in mirrors, and that unless someone accidentally impales her with a large piece of wood she could probably keep her secret longer. there's a line now, and jenna's firmly on the non-human side of it, like it or not.

after todd, there are people who won't care what jenna classifies herself as, people who will be every bit as terrified as she was when klaus used ric's body to threaten her. if klaus had been the only vampire jenna had met before dying-- before he killed her, just to drive the point home-- she might still be just as afraid.

but he wasn't the only one, and jenna can't just say nothing. so she's uncharacteristically anxious before this broadcast, staring at her communicator and changing her mind a million times. finally she sighs and pushes the button, quiet as all the careful speeches she prepared slip out of her head. ]

...Hi. Hey. [ sighing, she lifts a hand to wave awkwardly. ] For those of you who don't already know me, I'm Jenna. And I'm-- [ not human. not human. god, this is ridiculous. ] --stalling. I'll just go for it, like a bandaid.

I'm Jenna, and I'm a vampire. [ her words speed up here, because she's aware nothing here sounds like more than a sincerely nice trip taking hold. ] Here, hold on.



[ reaching out of frame, jenna grabs a small knife stolen from the kitchen-- a fit of paranoia, after katherine's arrival-- and holds it out. she's debated about this part, going back and forth all week. she's not happy with the idea for a multitude of reasons-- but even everyone won't be convinced regardless of what she does on-camera, if she has to somehow prove she's not just screwing around to everyone one by one, she'll go nuts. better a big impression first, and add more personal sides of the story one on one. ] If you're squeamish, you might not want to watch this part.

[ stripping off her hoodie and angling her arm so it's in clear view of the screen, jenna places the knife's tip on her upper arm before turning her head away and looking a little pale. the first score doesn't bring blood to the surface-- vampire strength is nothing when compared to a lifetime of trying to not cut herself when holding knives-- but after a deep breath she pushes harder, wincing as her skin splits under the blade. once the cut is long enough to make her point but not be dramatic, jenna prods at the wound a little, avoiding the sluggish, fat trickles of blood winding around her bicep. ] Sorry about that, it's just the best way I know to prove it. I mean, other than this.

[ all jenna has to do is let herself think about how much that hurt, how unfair this all is-- the ship, that she's dead at all, everything-- for her features to slip into something a lot less run of the mill. the whites of her eyes go red, veins protruding beneath them. she keeps her teeth firmly hidden behind her lips, but the point is hopefully made. her cut is beginning to close, as well, but it's still hard to switch back so jenna lets her hair swing in front of her face for a moment-- when she raises her head, the face on-screen is the one everyone who's met her up until now expects. ]

I don't drink from other people, I've never killed anyone, I really love garlic bread, all a holy water bath would do is make me cleaner, and I never asked for this. Any questions?

[ 'any questions'. yeah, she'd bet. ]

Comments

video; completely ineptly locked

[sweetmotherofgod]

[ ...congratulations, Jenna. You're the first person on this damn ship to see Heather cry.

Not that it's Jenna's fault - Heather knows that, and she'd have waited a little longer but this is too close to the bone and her goddamn eyes won't stop streaming. Likewise, there's a hell of a lot she wants to say. Too much, so that all that she can manage is a flat: ]

What the fuck.

video; slightly better...ly locked THANKS NATASHA

[unparental]

[ heather's not elena. sometimes jenna's grateful for that knowledge, and sometimes it just stings-- right now, through, she's only trying to remember that just because her first response isn't to go out and join the vampire version of pflag, doesn't mean heather's always going to feel this way. ]

I know.

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[consulting]

Not to be on the other end of the spectrum of skepticism - otherwise referred to as humanity - but are you really informing me of this? That I've managed to spend an exorbitant amount of time under the influence with someone capable of murdering me, because she was feeling 'peckish'?

[ Serious face, a moment of consideration. ]

2.2 VIDEO

[consulting]

[ He'll mull it over. for a second before coming to this conclusion. ]

Carry on.

[ He'll smile pleasantly, that mattered for about - liike 2 seconds. He's just realized why you keep out drinking him JENNA. ]

Tell me about your physiology.

video | encrypted

[awakenings]

[To say she's seen anything like this would be lying, but she has seen godlike creatures who were still referred to as "monsters". And, knowing that, she's both sympathetic and wary of Jenna's 'condition', for lack of a better term.

She regards her with curiosity.]

What do you eat? What's been sustaining you?

video | encrypted

[unparental]

[ jenna would be lying if she said being studied is a comfortable feeling-- but like the movie says, don't dump your purse out all over the floor if you don't want people commenting on what's inside. ]

Blood, but they've been synthesizing it for me. That way I'm not dipping into supplies someone needs if they're hurt. [ she also gets the blood that's nearly bad when the timing coincides, but some little details can be left out. ]

[video; locked]

[51stcentury]

[Jack is sitting forward, not looking disgusted or shocked or any of those things. He knows what it is to be different. He knows what it's like to keep a secret too]

You're outing yourself because you don't want trouble down the line for this. That's admirable. Be careful that you're not telling people too much, though.

[video; locked]

[unparental]

[ oh thank god, a 'so what' face. that's a nice face, and jack gets a relieved smile, and then a slight eyeroll as jenna nods. ]

Notice I mentioned what can't hurt me, not what can. I'm naively hoping no one comes after me with a fence post, not stupid. Promise.

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[slayer_not_player]

A self-claimed vampire that doesn't drink from other people? What do you drink from?

[Vampires? Tillman can accept that pretty easily. The eye thing and the fact that she picked something that could freak people out is pretty decent proof that she's... something otherworldly. Assessing a new threat is more important than denying the possibility simply because vampires don't exist.]

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[unparental]

[ 'self-claimed'. jenna mouths the words to herself then shrugs-- six months ago, she would have described anyone saying they were a vampire exactly the same way. ]

A bag, usually. Of synthesized blood. [ sliiiiiiiight emphasis on synthesized. ]

video.

[swagneto]

[ WELL THEN. This is what she had been referring to in their conversation earlier, when Erik chose not to pry on what he could do. Up until now he had believed they were fictional, but if Erik could manipulate metal, Raven could shape shift, and Charles was a telepath, it wouldn't be too far off for such beings to even exist in the first place.

Canting his head forward, he watches the attempt with interest, especially when she begins to shift, eyes gone wide out of fascination -- really fascinating. ]

What else can you do?

video.

[unparental]

[ ...now, that jenna wasn't expecting. it's the very nice sort of unexpected, but someone looking at her with interest that isn't purely scientific, and asking what she can do? it's better than defending the rights of undead americans. there's a small gap of silence, and then the rigidly perfect posture fades a little, and the smile she offers eric is genuine, if a little dim. ]

You win today's prize for asking it like that. I'm fast, and strong. [ picking up a towel, she wipes the skin of her arm briskly until the traces of red scrub off, leaving a few patches here and there but an otherwise unblemished arm. ] You saw the rest.

[ there's more, of course-- weaknesses and strengths, and a few jenna of them isn't even concealing on purpose; being new at vampirism has a fairly odd learning curve when you go it alone-- but there's a large gap between transparency and sheer thoughtlessness. ]

[ video ]

[timedaughter]

[Jenny watches the whole thing, eyebrows raising slightly at the healing cut, but this is... really not a big deal to her. Well, finding out vampires are real is sort of exciting, but she isn't going to start asking you questions about coffins or anything, promise.]

As long as you aren't hurting anyone, I don't see the problem. You're getting what you need, though? In terms of everything you need to sustain your health?

[ video ]

[unparental]

[ so far, no cliches. but jenna's just waiting for it. ]

...I am, yeah. Thanks.

[audio]

[testgasm]

Augh. Okay, just. Put the fluids away. Nobody wants to see that.

[bodily fluids are obviously the biggest concern here]

[audio]

[unparental]

...It doesn't exactly reabsorb. [ but it does wipe away, so she'll be doing that now. ] Better?

VIDEO; encrypted

[widowing]

[ well, that certainly explains jenna having asked about blood when she first made a network post. natasha's expression is hard to read, as it typically is, but she's eyeing jenna carefully.

jenna's been harmless thus far. there's no reason not to take her at her word, except for the fact that she was keeping something this huge hidden from the general public. ]

What made you decide to reveal this now?

VIDEO; encrypted

[unparental]

[ hey, at least no one's threatened to kill her yet. jenna feels a little like a zoo animal, but nobody forced her to come out-- that's all on her.

and natasha's... if not a friend, she's someone jenna respects and likes. so she'll give that question serious thought and answer without flippancy. ]

Because I'm scared, mostly. People were attacked, and it's not like being a vampire looks good right now. I wanted to make sure I was the one who told people. [ because why admit to this if she has anything to hide, is the subtext. ]

VIDEO; encrypted | SOMMERS WHAT THE FUCK

[manipulativni]

[ oh, katherine is very much not pleased about this turn of events. she may or may not have destroyed several of the items in her room before replying. ]

I really hope you know what the hell you're doing.

VIDEO; encrypted | HER ONLY LIFE GOAL IS PISSING YOU OFF KAT BB

[unparental]

[ ...bright side. ]

So do I. How are you eating?

text。

[topology]

[ what the fuck did he just watch holy shit did that wound just close by itself ]

Is that a diagnosis you came to on your own, or did someone tell you?

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[unparental]

[ PRETTY BALLER HUH for values of baller meaning 'what the fuck even'. ]

It wasn't a diagnosis per se, but pretty much.

[statsraaden]

[What.

The.

Hell.

Stats cannot help staring at the whole sequence.

What the hell did he just see.

He's almost freaking out.]

What the... the... what...

[unparental]

[ wincing a little, jenna lets her hair swing down to hide her face for a moment. ]

Yeah.

video;

[theshabbiestofmen]

[He stares for a few seconds-- but oh, man, he knows that feel, bro. That shameful feel, that defensive edge, that sick drop of the stomach as you wait for someone else's reaction-- it's far too familiar for him not to comment. To let her know there's at least one person who doesn't think her an automatic freak.

(And, somewhere in the back of his mind, he takes note of people's lack of terrified disbelief. So people around here are at least somewhat aware that vampires aren't just myths? Well, good for them. Perhaps they're a more educated breed of Muggle.)

He gives her a small smile.]

That's brave, telling people like this. I don't think I'd have that kind of courage, were it me.

[His smile twists for just a moment, turning slightly self-deprecating-- and then it's gone back to normal, just like that.]

Have you been one for long?

video;

[unparental]

[ for her part, jenna's still waiting for the other shoe to drop. she's never had to be ashamed of who she is, never had to wonder if just being jenna would make someone hate her, sight unseen, and the sick, bitter taste in the back of her throat is all the worse for how unfamiliar it is. ]

Between us, it's not that brave. Somebody has to do it, might as well be me. [ and it sure as fuck isn't going to be katherine-- jenna's fine with most of the ship assuming she's the only one.

lupin's smile doesn't go unnoticed, but other than filing it away for later, she doesn't comment and instead holds up four fingers. ]

Four jumps, and a little under a day.

[video]

[circumitus]

Abilities like those sounds like they might have the potential to be useful in a pinch.

[She's not worried. Or shocked by the scene, for that matter.]

[video]

[unparental]

The idea's crossed my mind.

[ oh thank god. jenna was expecting a few more fireworks-- this is much better. ]

video;

[surrogates]

It's been a while since I went to church, but I'm pretty sure it'd make you more holy as opposed to cleaning you.

[ This is his own way of covering up his small tracks of "yes this is my girlfiend, and yes, I did know she was a vampire." It's best he avoids commenting on the fallout (which he knows will happen). ]

Couldn't have done a blood bag instead?

video ; locked

[unparental]

The point was that it's not going to hurt me-- and don't you have to believe for that to work? Or is that Peter Pan.

[ she's only joking because she's terrified. ]

I wanted to. I actually wanted to just say it, but you know that that sounds like. People would think I was drunk, and I think if I had to prove it to everyone I'd go nuts.

video | encrypted 85%

[constructum]

[ well she didn't see that one coming, and now she is just going to sit looking at the screen like a deer in headlights for a moment.

WTF? ]

Umm..[ yeah, she is trying to find her words now. she doesn't want to sound like a complete fool after all. ]

How long have you been like [ a small gesture at her screen. ] this?

video | encrypted 85%

[unparental]

Four jumps and a couple hours. Give or take.

[ she bites her lip, sighs. ]

Surprise?

video;

[grndnpnd]

[ Tommy's used to blood and gore, so he doesn't flinch at that. When his face shows up on the video, it looks more confused than anything, pulling his eyebrows together as he tries to remember what he knows about vampires and somehow make that fit with reality. ]

So, [ he says after a while, ] what you're saying is you could've won at the fight club?

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[unparental]

[ for a minute, jenna's quiet; then she just starts to laugh, helplessly. it's a little bit more about releasing tension than it is humor by the end, but she still has to wipe at her eyes and take a minute to stop. ]

I'm sorry, I just-- I needed that question. More than I knew. [ her grin goes a little mischievous, here. ] And sorry, but yeah. Maybe with both hands tied behind my back.

private video;

[angerissues]

[ Mason's just staring. For a long, long time. In fact, it's probably a good ten minutes after she originally posts this that he actually grabs his comm (it's amazing he didn't break it) and hits the button to respond. ]

You could've told me you were planning on doing this, you know. [ Mostly because he really doesn't like being caught off guard, especially when the sight of her vamp face makes him sick (even if he did know what she was and what it would look like - this is Jenna, after all) but also because it puts him in danger of being outed, too. And Katherine, but that's a little lower on his list of priorities.

Not to mention the reactions of everyone on the ship. ]

private video;

[unparental]

...I know. [ that's a definite rueful expression on her face-- it's hard to be reckless and take that last step when cooler heads would add caution to the mix. ] But you would have talked me out of it, and it needed to happen. [ hey, at least she cops to it, right? ]

People already know about me. If anything happened-- [ if katherine happened-- ] I just need not to end up locked up for something I didn't do.

voice;

[20mentholkools]

Very risky thing you just did.

voice;

[unparental]

So people keep telling me.

text

[handelaar]

[After looking over everyone else's questions he... still has questions. Damn.]

1. Who gives you the synthesized blood
2. What about sunlight

text

[unparental]

1. If they want to say something, they can.
2. We're in space.

[ WILLFULLY MISUNDERSTANDING WHY NOT. ]

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[darkholme]

Wow. [Raven's a bit enamored by all this. She can heal. And-- drink blood, right, she clearly wasn't kidding about the vampire thing. Kay.]

How did-? I mean, were you born this way?

video; locked

[unparental]

Right? [ after erik-- and the idea of learning to fight from tommy-- suddenly the upsides of being open are making themselves known. NO PICKLE JAR SHALL EVER STAY CLOSED AGAIN. ]

Oh, not even close. I was arguably normal for twenty seven years.

[video]

[tarheel]

Welp. [with distinct undertones of "that sure was a thing that just happened."]

Hi, Jenna. I'm Chapel, and I am personally very glad you didn't admit to being a sparkly vampire on-camera. We'd have probably had to draw a collective line at the sparkling.

[video]

[unparental]

Oh, god no.

[ ...hi chapel. jenna is not down with the twilight, ftr. LACK OF FEMALE AGENCY, WEIRD MISOGYNY and then the worst offense: the porn isn't even hot. (she's got mad priorities.) ]

No sparkling, no brooding.

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[heltersskelter]

[he should be reacting with horror here, right. yes.
instead, when the video clicks on, he looks almost fascinated.]

Dude.

video;

[unparental]

[ jkfskhfdskhfsd tiny (...tinier than jenna, at least) person. ]

Yeah, I know.

[saidhe]

[ Queue someone else up for the fascinated club ahem. ]

In which case I owe Old Man Langley a rather large sum of money. It's good he's not around to collect that.

[ Though he does seem generally unbothered by it, which is odd. Something that's before his eyes and understandable, he can handle, and quite frankly, he's seen weirder lately. ]

You mean to say that all this time, I've been working with a blood drinker? [ Which comes off a bit more rudely than he means it, but he's old school, man. ] A moment, what DO you drink, if not human blood?

[unparental]

I prefer 'grad student' or 'massive day drinker'. Just for the record.

[ but the sherlocks are just maladjusted little fucks and to be honest if one of the pair of them didn't respond with zero sensitivity jenna might worry. ]

Synthetic blood. It's the tofudog of blood.

Video

[bottlearum]

[He watches the whole things with his eyebrows raised. He's seen a few things like this before, but he'd never thought vampires could be real. But well, he's battled with the undead before, so why not. When she's down showing everything, the only thing he has to say is:]

...well that's interesting.

Video

[unparental]

People keep saying that.

[ not that jenna's complaining about the dearth of BACK, EVIL HELL BEAST but it's almost anticlimactic. ]