http://starstripedhero.livejournal.com/ (
starstripedhero.livejournal.com) wrote in
ataraxion2011-12-12 12:27 am
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Entry tags:
- agent carolina,
- america (alfred f. jones),
- ariadne,
- arthur,
- asato,
- austria (roderich edelstein),
- belarus (natalia arlovskaya),
- chase kilgannon,
- connor temple,
- gideon "mouse" graham,
- heatwave,
- hungary (elizaveta héderváry),
- imogen "cambridge" moore,
- jack noir | au,
- mace,
- max "hotspur" southey,
- robert capa,
- spock (xi),
- statsraaden,
- taylor "tyke" kee,
- tony stark,
- wheatley
[video] 002
[ Hi Tranquility. Are you ready dor a mouthfull? Cause you're getting it. Feed clicks on to show America, apparently just out of his jumpsuit and in his boxers. He's just seated on his bed, hair tousled a bit, evidently not very concerned about his appearance even though he's addressing who knows how many people. He's too lazy to get up. He's eating out of a bag of chips that he found aboard the ship when exploring the facilities; that is what he spent all day doing.
Giving the communicator a bit of a salute, he says something incoherent with his mouth full before flashing a grin. ]
HEEEEEY YOU GUYS. EVENING, DUDES, THIS IS YOUR HERO SPEAKING. GOT SOME IMPORTANT TO SAY. You better listen up, I've also got a surprise for you all! [ He adjusts his posture, throat clearing. ]
Hahaha, righto! SO! If you are unfamiliar with EARTH, or whatever, I've been awesomely awesome as usual and drew myself a map for you dudes so you can understand the very, VERY, important things about the Earth I've graciously drawn out for you. Yeah, I'm a nice guy! Hahahaaha! So, here we go! It looks something like THIS, are you ready?? Tony, bro, if you will please!
[ A little grey alien jumps into view, holding up a piece of paper which looks like this: ]

HAHAA. RIGHT, so that totally accurate cause I drew it! Everything circled is MINE, and I pointed out my dick cause it has the HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH! This is for you slackers that didn't pay attention to American geography class for whatever reason!! Hahaha, so! On the subject of my dick, [ pointing to the map as he say all of this ] I'll just segway as to why THIS IS MY DICK. If you don't know what the shit I'm talking about, I'M GONNA EXPLAIN. [ A brief pause to stuff some chips in his mouth and he speaks, lips smacking before swallowing. ]
--So, I figure I'll be the heroic one and take responsibility here. I'm gonna break something to you all just in case you hear country names being thrown around and you're all: Oh my GOD WHAT THE SHIT!?!? I THOUGHT YOU WERE ALFRED, OH GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING.
RIIIIIIIGHT, chill out, here's the low-down. Some of us you may talk to are the embodiments of our respectable countries we're being called. We're like the spirits of our countries like some crazy Miyazaki film or something. SO YEAH YOU HEARD ME. YEAH IT'S MIND-BLOWING, INNIT? BUT YOU KNOW THIS WHOLE THING IS MIND-BLOWING,. I MET CAPTAIN KIRK WHO IS SUPPOSED TO BE FICTIONAL, SO WHATEVER, DUDE. And we have human names just for kicks, and when we gotta use them for living out normal life shit or something. [ He picks at his nose slightly before continuing. ]
Uh, okay, RIGHT SOMETHING COOL: Apparently people also can be from different timelines and alternate dimensions and it's REALLY FUCKING FAR OUT AND AWESOME! BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT BESIDES THE FACT YOU MAY BE FROM OUR WORLD, OR YOU MAY NOT.
Anyway, back on the subject of us, basically we're all really, really important and have a degree of immortality and super strength and stamina last I checked! The citizens and the government make us up, parts of the landmass coincide with parts on our body, etccc, etccc, yadda yadda. So far there are only four of us I've seen on this ship! We're hundreds of years old, we age differently, we die differently, we've fought in wars, we've done responsibilities that you don't even KNOW OF, MAN. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.
OKAY SOOOOO, ONTO THE INTROS I'll introduce!
If you see a girl that thinks she has a dick, has long hair with a flower in it sometimes, that's Hungary! Maybe you know her as Elizaveta. F.Y.I, J.S.Y.K HISTORY LESSON: She used to be married to this dude named Austria, or Roderich if you give a shit about European history, which I really don't!! Haha! He's here and he has glasses and is like a pansy. They're both from the 1950's for some reason! WHICH REALLY BLOWS MY MIND CAUSE HOLY SHIT IT'S LIKE BACK TO THE FUTURE.
Hahaha! Right! And the other one is Natalia, or Belarus. If you meet a crazy lady that wants to marry her brother, that's her and you should just.. be careful. She's former USSR and scary as shit. She's from the year crazy and will ALWAYS be there. Basically I gotta say about her; just be cautious, even if she's hot. Don't give into her hotness, she'll lure you in like a she-devil and propaganda your shit out.
[ A bit of laughter, sounding a bit nervous if anything, he throws his head back. ]
HAHAHA! SO ANYWAY, DUDES. There's one of us for every country! Isn't that kind of AWESOME?? Other country guys that I haven't seen are England. You can tell by his massive eyebrows and Simon Cowell I-hate-my-life personality that he is England and I kicked his ass in the Revolution. Juuuuust thought I'd throw that out there for you people that aren't familiar with anything pertaining to America. Never try anything he cooks, and he hallucinates fairies and shit. Just ignore that; he's loony--
If you see a guy with a fat face, fat nose, fat ass, fat stomach, that's Russia, or Ivan! He's stupid and you shouldn't like him. Why? Well, he's a Communist power hungry dick and I beat his ass in the Cold War! [ no you didn't ] Yeah, I know I'm cool.
Oh! And one more I'll talk about. if you see a dude that looks like lady with blond hair and a thick accent, you should just run! That's the Frenchie, or Francis, and he smells like garlic and he's basically a pervert. Aaaaaall you gotta know about him. Those are just a few of us! But like I said, I've only seen Hungary, Austria, and Belarus.
[ A beat, he takes a deep breath. ]
SO LAY IT ON ME, DUDES AND DUDETTES. Am I making myself clear? Get it? Map of the earth? We're the embodiments of that? We're the SHIT COOOOOOL AWESOME? DISNEYWORLD IS ON MY DICK???
HAAHAA, SO. If you have any questions regarding this, feel free to contact me!
This is Alfred F. Jones, the United States of America......
OVER AND OUT!!!!
[ THE MOST CONFUSING EXPLANATION EVER, BUT HERE YOU GO. ]
Giving the communicator a bit of a salute, he says something incoherent with his mouth full before flashing a grin. ]
HEEEEEY YOU GUYS. EVENING, DUDES, THIS IS YOUR HERO SPEAKING. GOT SOME IMPORTANT TO SAY. You better listen up, I've also got a surprise for you all! [ He adjusts his posture, throat clearing. ]
Hahaha, righto! SO! If you are unfamiliar with EARTH, or whatever, I've been awesomely awesome as usual and drew myself a map for you dudes so you can understand the very, VERY, important things about the Earth I've graciously drawn out for you. Yeah, I'm a nice guy! Hahahaaha! So, here we go! It looks something like THIS, are you ready?? Tony, bro, if you will please!
[ A little grey alien jumps into view, holding up a piece of paper which looks like this: ]

HAHAA. RIGHT, so that totally accurate cause I drew it! Everything circled is MINE, and I pointed out my dick cause it has the HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH! This is for you slackers that didn't pay attention to American geography class for whatever reason!! Hahaha, so! On the subject of my dick, [ pointing to the map as he say all of this ] I'll just segway as to why THIS IS MY DICK. If you don't know what the shit I'm talking about, I'M GONNA EXPLAIN. [ A brief pause to stuff some chips in his mouth and he speaks, lips smacking before swallowing. ]
--So, I figure I'll be the heroic one and take responsibility here. I'm gonna break something to you all just in case you hear country names being thrown around and you're all: Oh my GOD WHAT THE SHIT!?!? I THOUGHT YOU WERE ALFRED, OH GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING.
RIIIIIIIGHT, chill out, here's the low-down. Some of us you may talk to are the embodiments of our respectable countries we're being called. We're like the spirits of our countries like some crazy Miyazaki film or something. SO YEAH YOU HEARD ME. YEAH IT'S MIND-BLOWING, INNIT? BUT YOU KNOW THIS WHOLE THING IS MIND-BLOWING,. I MET CAPTAIN KIRK WHO IS SUPPOSED TO BE FICTIONAL, SO WHATEVER, DUDE. And we have human names just for kicks, and when we gotta use them for living out normal life shit or something. [ He picks at his nose slightly before continuing. ]
Uh, okay, RIGHT SOMETHING COOL: Apparently people also can be from different timelines and alternate dimensions and it's REALLY FUCKING FAR OUT AND AWESOME! BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT BESIDES THE FACT YOU MAY BE FROM OUR WORLD, OR YOU MAY NOT.
Anyway, back on the subject of us, basically we're all really, really important and have a degree of immortality and super strength and stamina last I checked! The citizens and the government make us up, parts of the landmass coincide with parts on our body, etccc, etccc, yadda yadda. So far there are only four of us I've seen on this ship! We're hundreds of years old, we age differently, we die differently, we've fought in wars, we've done responsibilities that you don't even KNOW OF, MAN. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.
OKAY SOOOOO, ONTO THE INTROS I'll introduce!
If you see a girl that thinks she has a dick, has long hair with a flower in it sometimes, that's Hungary! Maybe you know her as Elizaveta. F.Y.I, J.S.Y.K HISTORY LESSON: She used to be married to this dude named Austria, or Roderich if you give a shit about European history, which I really don't!! Haha! He's here and he has glasses and is like a pansy. They're both from the 1950's for some reason! WHICH REALLY BLOWS MY MIND CAUSE HOLY SHIT IT'S LIKE BACK TO THE FUTURE.
Hahaha! Right! And the other one is Natalia, or Belarus. If you meet a crazy lady that wants to marry her brother, that's her and you should just.. be careful. She's former USSR and scary as shit. She's from the year crazy and will ALWAYS be there. Basically I gotta say about her; just be cautious, even if she's hot. Don't give into her hotness, she'll lure you in like a she-devil and propaganda your shit out.
[ A bit of laughter, sounding a bit nervous if anything, he throws his head back. ]
HAHAHA! SO ANYWAY, DUDES. There's one of us for every country! Isn't that kind of AWESOME?? Other country guys that I haven't seen are England. You can tell by his massive eyebrows and Simon Cowell I-hate-my-life personality that he is England and I kicked his ass in the Revolution. Juuuuust thought I'd throw that out there for you people that aren't familiar with anything pertaining to America. Never try anything he cooks, and he hallucinates fairies and shit. Just ignore that; he's loony--
If you see a guy with a fat face, fat nose, fat ass, fat stomach, that's Russia, or Ivan! He's stupid and you shouldn't like him. Why? Well, he's a Communist power hungry dick and I beat his ass in the Cold War! [ no you didn't ] Yeah, I know I'm cool.
Oh! And one more I'll talk about. if you see a dude that looks like lady with blond hair and a thick accent, you should just run! That's the Frenchie, or Francis, and he smells like garlic and he's basically a pervert. Aaaaaall you gotta know about him. Those are just a few of us! But like I said, I've only seen Hungary, Austria, and Belarus.
[ A beat, he takes a deep breath. ]
SO LAY IT ON ME, DUDES AND DUDETTES. Am I making myself clear? Get it? Map of the earth? We're the embodiments of that? We're the SHIT COOOOOOL AWESOME? DISNEYWORLD IS ON MY DICK???
HAAHAA, SO. If you have any questions regarding this, feel free to contact me!
This is Alfred F. Jones, the United States of America......
OVER AND OUT!!!!
[ THE MOST CONFUSING EXPLANATION EVER, BUT HERE YOU GO. ]
[Video]
Alfred, what's your number. I don't think this is something you want the whole ship knowing, is it? And maybe I can help a bit, considering I'm at least a somewhat familiar face that won't stab you?
video;
.... 176.
I guess like.. 1776... which is just hella weird.
[Video]
video;
I've been running around all day.
[ says this as he rolls on his back, sprawling out slightly. ]
[Action! \o/]
Alfred?
perma-action!
--How do I know you're not going to hurt me, huh? You've been threatening to kill me several times already and I don't know why besides the fact MAYBE I am being loud but it's just for the safety and convenience of everyone.
no subject
Do I look like I'm going to hurt you right now? Honestly, I'm just here to talk and I'm saving you some of your "manliness" by doing so face-to-face instead of a place where people can follow along.
no subject
You sort of look like you want to halfway seduce me; but then go into battle in space. I don't know which is sexier.
[ He speaks this nonchalantly, pinching the bridge of his nose. He steps back then over to his bed, but doesn't get on it. He instead sits on the floor with his back against his bed. ]
I don't need like any comforting though. But.. company is cool, I guess.
no subject
Are you sure about that? You seemed awfully upset about everything, I don't bite. Well, not unless you as me nicely, I guess.
no subject
He really is a piggy in a blanket.A sigh. ]
I'm not too awfully upset. I just want to get people back home more than anything else, really.
[ so he can get glory but you don't need to know that he's supposed to appear really, really caring!!!! ]
I kind of wish England was here. Maybe even France.
Nothing personal, but I just have better relations with them.
no subject
Carrying on how you were isn't going to get anyone home and will divide people more than it will unite them.
... No harm done, though why anyone would want France around is a great question, don't you think? Personally, I'd rather just be done with this place and back home. It sucks, sure, but at least it's something familiar and something I know how to deal with...
no subject
France has helped me in the past a lot. He and my newest president are getting along. Yeaaaah, he's a smelly stuck up guy but he's beneficial to my interests. His food is good too when it's something normal.
Don't get me wrong; both England and France are dicks, but we do a lot of business together so I'm used to them.
[ He leans his head all the way back to rest it on the bed. ]
And you cannot tell anybody that. Everybody has to know I'm totally fine. Cause I mean, nothing is a big deal anyway, j.s.y.k.
...
That stands for just so you know.
no subject
If you say so, I've only ever cared about France once and that was when Turkey had his paws on me so long ago. Disgusting, mind you.
Understood, I had no intentions on telling anyone about this anyway. ... Thank you for that translation, by the way.
no subject
Yeah. Whatever. No problem.
[ He shifts a little bit, seeming thoughtful for a moment. ]
You know, I had a thought about this place. I didn't mention it on the communicator, but I can tell you if you want.
no subject
Go for it, I'd love to know what ideas people have about this. I'm... still not above thinking it's an elaborate jail.
no subject
Like I mean it. You gotta pinkie swear.
[ holding out his pinkie, lala SUCH A CHILD. look at that srs bsnss face. ]
no subject
I promise. Now tell me.
no subject
[ He shakes his pinkie. ]
Since we're all from different timelines; people are from various places, we're totally in some different period right now. Like, presently. It could be the future, it could be the past. I don't know.
But... what if we're in a period where our world doesn't exist anymore? We're in some place in space, further away than anything familiar; maybe we've been sleeping in those tubes for years and years... stowed away like....
....
frozen hamburger patties you forget about until you clean your fridge out.
...What if it's way in the future where the world has ended somehow?
It crossed my mind, and freaked me out.
I don't want my world gone.
Then I thought, if that was the case, wouldn't it effect us somehow if our landmasses were completely gone?
no subject
If... if that's the case, then that would mean the others are in those couches still, right? Isn't there some way we can go check and see if this is true or not?
I honestly don't want to think that our world is gone, not by any means. But if the others are here but haven't woken up, then it kind of explains a lot of it...
no subject
.. Or maybe they were still left on Earth when it got destroyed.
[ LOOK AT THAT FACE...... ]
no subject
No. That can't be what happened, absolutely not.
no subject
[ young creative mind, too many sci-fi movies, and all of that. ]
They could have been on here, gotten eaten by something. I'm still nervous there are aliens on here; lurking around every corner. That is why I always carry my gun. I don't have any extra ammo, so I want to use my gun only for emergencies unless I can find more ammo.
Or maybe they were sent to another time period like how you were sent here; and they're on another ship. Maybe it's a fleet of ships. Maybe we're all going to the same place.
Maybe we're all going somewhere... really, really bad.
no subject
Let's just. Leave the questions for the time being and see how this plays out, huh? We can't say anything for sure right now and we can't get ourselves worked up over something like this without any proof.
no subject
I've already researched parts of the ship and taken notes. They're right over there if you want to see them.
[ He says, pointing ti a stack of paper. ]
It's like.. if I don't come up with an explanation, how can I have a solution?