voice.

[traumata]

I'm glad everyone's alright.

[ alright here being a subjective term. not dead might be better, though that's also a subjective term in this instance. the message is a bit late on the tail-end of the previous week's violence, and some clarification would probably be helpful, but kieren's second-guessed starting this discussion about a thousand times. now that he's finally going for it, the tactic's too leap before you look to be completely coherent. ]

It's not your fault. That's what people will be saying, anyway, about any damage you've done or harm you've caused, but I know it's difficult to believe. And it isn't true, really, because if you hadn't been alive, then maybe it wouldn't have happened.

Acting like the guilt's not there doesn't help. But if you can accept it, there's a chance you can learn to live around it.

[ except now he's getting insanely awkward group therapy flashbacks. the attempt to make the conversation less dire is a mildly panicked afterthought, tacked on quickly. ]

And I know I'm late to space Christmas, but if anyone wants any pictures — paintings, portraits, anything like that for belated gifts, I'd be happy to do something if you've got the materials.

[ super awkward pause, then: ] Thanks.

Comments

[invisibilitea]

You paint?

[traumata]

[ well at least that's an easy question. ]

No. I just thought offering paintings would be a great incentive to learn. [ sarcastic, but his tone's friendly. ] Do you?

[invisibilitea]

[DON'T BE MEAN-]

No. But I would love for someone to paint a friend of mine. I could probably pay you.

[traumata]

[ it's ok annie it's how he shows affection. ]

I'm not too worried about payment, really, I just haven't got loads of materials. Do you know if anyone's got any paint? I know someone's got a big stash of red, at least.

[ yo creepy warnings on the walls. ]

[invisibilitea]

Oh, I don't know, but I can likely find some.

Hullo, then, I'm Annie.

[forpoland]

I have paint available if you'd like to borrow them.

[traumata]

I'd appreciate that, thank you. [ and this is kind of an embarrassing echo of annie's question to him, but: ] Do you paint?

[forpoland]

You're welcome.

And I do. ... Did. I painted fans for my earnings in Paris.

[traumata]

You're from Paris?

[ !!! ]

I was thinking of moving there, actually. Before— [ the government said he couldn't. ] This. Were you born there?

[forpoland]

Oui.

It was a beautiful city. Full of life. [And in the middle of a revolution] Ah- no. I am from Arles.

voice.

[instincts]

Yeah. Arts and crafts really take the edge off calling everyone monsters.

voice.

[traumata]

[ hey the success rate is 2/3 so far so suck it. ]

I didn't say that.

voice.

[instincts]

You didn't have to. Why else would you tack it on at the end of telling us about how guilty we should all feel?

voice.

[traumata]

No, that isn't— I didn't call anyone a monster. And I didn't say you should feel guilty, just that if you did...

[ he pulls the defensive reply up short. maybe he should've just stuck with arts and crafts. ] Sorry, who are you?

voice;

[axeyou]

Thanks for the advice. Can I ask you a question?

[without waiting for a yes or no--!]

Who fed you that line?

voice;

[striking]

Johanna.

[ tone translation: don't rag on this guy's coping skills just because you have none of your own ok. ]

voice;

[axeyou]

What.

[tone translation: who asked you and also 0 coping skills is ttly legit thnx]

voice;

[striking]

You know what.

voice;

[traumata]

[ definitely about to answer when she cuts him off. after a short pause for thought: ]

Someone who would've been very unpopular on this ship, apparently.

voice;

[axeyou]

It's not unpopular. It's cute, and I bet everyone will go for it.

What did you do?

voice;

[traumata]

[ can't tell if that's serious or angry or sarcasm. ]

Yeah, well, very recent experience says maybe they won't.

[ there's a slight delay, but fair's fair. ]

I've hurt people. Before, not here. I couldn't stop it, at the time, but it was still my doing.

[revivalism]

[ Please note how much willpower it's taking for him not to go after Malia or Johanna and be appropriately grateful. ]

Are you okay?

[traumata]

[ noted and deeply appreciated. he's kind of impressed, actually. ]

Yeah, I'm great. I've always wanted to be stuck on a killer spaceship.

[ sarcastic, which means he's basically fine. ]

[revivalism]

[ It's a Christmas miracle. And the sarcasm is a gift. ]

You did want to leave Roarton.

[traumata]

Space is taking it a bit far, I think.

[ still occasionally better than roarton, somehow. ]

But really, I'm fine. Thanks. Did you have a nice Christmas?

[ :') ]