video;

[rubblegoddess]

[Hello, everyone! It's late, late night, and you're now being treated to the sight of... bare skin!? What?

Yes, it's bare skin, a bit out of focus, but that's what it is. The holder of the device sighs in what she hopes is a thoughtful manner.]

I know the science of it, the biology, yes, but I don't like it. Legs are troublesome enough...

[The feed is flipped over to reveal a young woman with dark, mussed hair and a haughty look. She sounds completely perturbed, but somehow bored at the same time.]

...inefficient as they are. This is a nuisance.

[Camera back to skin, camera back up. Yes, by now you may have figured out that she's showing off one slender leg.]

There's hair. On my leg. On both legs, actually. I don't know whether to be fascinated by the wonder of the human body or completely disgusted.

Comments

[rubblegoddess]

Oh, I see. I might have some questions, yes.

Am I going to die?

[testgasm]

uh

eventually yes the human body ages and expires it's not very pleasant to think about

good news though average life span for a human is probably eighty years ish so you've got time

if you mean to ask if you're capable of dying then that's also a yes

you're a bit more squishy and fragile now than what i assume you're used to so you'll want to be careful

don't go running around with sharp objects and take care not to fall off things

[rubblegoddess]

I would like to not die. Not for a while. Besides, if I run, I might fall.

[testgasm]

wouldn't we all like to not die

running's not so hard but it's best to master walking first

then walking quickly followed by jogging and if that seems all right you should be good to run

i was referring more to falling off of high elevations

[rubblegoddess]

No, I won't be climbing anything or going anywhere high. I hate walking. I miss being... me.

[testgasm]

yes well join the club

on all counts

i wish i could tell you it's not so bad but it is actually that bad

[rubblegoddess]

So far, it seems that way. But I'll be fine. I have a handsome knight to protect me, and I've already made some very nice friends.

[testgasm]

uh

right who would that be

[rubblegoddess]

Other AIs of course.

[testgasm]

yes but which ones that's important

[rubblegoddess]

The cute ones.

[testgasm]

see you'll have to give me some names

i've always found humans sort of weird looking myself

bizarre

[rubblegoddess]

Do you know nice people? They're so cute. They don't look cute but they act cute.

[testgasm]

yes i know nice people but i don't think i'd use that term to describe them

[rubblegoddess]

No? You might not know the right people then.

[testgasm]

you might not know the right people which is why i'm asking for names so i can make sure they're the right people

[rubblegoddess]

Do you know Delta?

[testgasm]

i do know delta

delta gets my seal of approval

[rubblegoddess]

I want to be very affectionate toward him and call him something endearing.

I think I have a problem.

[testgasm]

i uh

i don't think that's something i can help you with mate

not really my area of expertise

[rubblegoddess]

It isn't mine, either.

Feelings are difficult.

[testgasm]

yes they are enjoy it

that should be the slogan

welcome to humanity: feelings are difficult

[rubblegoddess]

Oh. They can put that on a shirt or something and I'll wear it every single day. What do you think?

[testgasm]

see i can't tell if you've crossed the line into facetiousness or not

[rubblegoddess]

I'm not sure, either.