[video] In which one of the Sherlocks is as cool as motherfucking shit.

[lovesfaygo]

[ There's a jostle, and a familiar, fluctuating voice can be heard. ]

Hang on, I think I fucking got it. It's all in my pocket and shit, all up in here. Cozy like a motherfucking rainbow.

[ He laughs, and it's more like a sputtering chortle and--yup, there it is. A tell-tale honk as the gray-skinned troll pulls the device out of wherever it's been--it looks like under a sheet of some sort--and there's a huge clutter of various things strewn around the room. One of which is the mattress that used to make up the bed. ]

Motherfuck, there we go. So hey, world. I've got something pretty motherfucking important to share with you.

[ And, in the corner, a pie tray filled with neon green goo, half eaten. One of his very last pies. And also in the background that's--

Yup. The second Sherlock Holmes. ]

All you motherfuckers, I've come to a realization. This ship. Is, like, a motherfucking case. We need to solve.

Comments

[zoosmell]

i don't really liked baked goods, so i don't understand!
i guess it must be really good pie?
it's nice to see you making friends with trolls, i guess...

[saidhe]

Don't- Why, it's a scandal. They're one of the only favorable parts of eating.

The pie is satisfactory. Its effects wavy. And pretty.

[zoosmell]

yeah, that's...
pie?
anyway, i am sure there are other good food you can put your drugs into!
like candy?

[saidhe]

I prefer -

[ NO, Sherlock, no, admitting the tactics of habitual drug use aloud is probably unsavory around young boys hmm. ]

Yes. Or I suppose sugar distribution with morning tea.

[zoosmell]

you could put it in your dinner!
like in your eggs and toast and orange juice and stuff.
and possibly eggplants, but i am not sure how that would taste.
eggplants are very questionable.

[saidhe]

Of course it - A purple vegetable, I mean, what's that all about?

But in things like potatoes and also venison are understandable, if salty.

[zoosmell]

yeah!
you can put them in anything!
i bet you can even put your drugs in drugs and make a drugs sandwich.
it will be awesome and possibly salty.

[saidhe]

[ drugception brrrmrmrmrmrrmrm ]

Catastrophic, to be told, depending on which combination one applies to the sandwich in question.

[zoosmell]

we should totally do it.
it will be the best sandwich ever.
or second best sandwich?
some sandwiches are actually pretty good.
but second best is great, too.

[saidhe]

But it's still markedly second.

[zoosmell]

we could make it into a contest?
you will make the BEST drug sandwich!
and i will make the BEST sandwich sandwich!
then we can try each other's and see who has the better one?

[saidhe]

-- Both together somehow managing to be the best sandwich, simultaneously.

Elegant.

[ all ideas are best ideas when you're zonked okay ]

[zoosmell]

you seem to be drugged out and/or cursed a lot...
is it loads of fun?

[saidhe]

[ There really is no point in hiding it. John remains a strange boy, perhaps not the most intelligent, but clever enough. And Holmes likes him, so he's not going to sell him short. He pauses before he answers. ]

No.

[ His eyebrows furrow in the slightest, considering. ] Though it helps.

[zoosmell]

oh...
helps with what?
i can help, too.
i'm not the best and i probably can't beat drugs!
but i could try...

[saidhe]

My mind is a tangled mess on even its better days, an archive in desperate need of organization. And that remains only when it's feeling more cooperative than as per usual.

[ He has trouble describing it in any manner that's elegant to someone who's not HIM, so when he tries and, so far as he regards himself, fails, he has a moment of uncharacteristic hesitation. ]

So I suppose you could certainly try.

[zoosmell]

i do not really have that problem at all, so that is very hard...
but my friend rose is in her head a lot, too?
she's so smart and she's into these really grimdark things?
but she also knits!
maybe that is helpful!
if that doesn't work, you can tell me everything you are thinking and i will organize it with the best computer in the world.
and that is my high-powered MIND.
it is like an entire cabinet in here.
all ready for some sortin' business!
i will sort so hard that even you might be sorted if you are not careful!

[saidhe]

[ Th...in sigh. ]

My perfect problem has very possibly transcended any need for knitting. But- an astute suggestion. You don't want to be held privy to my thought process, I will tell you now.

[ Beat. ]

Rose Lalonde, perchance?

this is a threadjack i apologize.

[wiretap]

john.

do not make a drug sandwich.

i feel so flattered and shy crying into my soft hands

[zoosmell]

why not?
i will be careful!
and if i'm not careful, i probably won't die, anyway.
but if you wanted some, i would give you some!
i do not need that many drug sandwiches.
i think dave would get angry.
i can already hear him.
"egbert blah blah blah ironic irony loser doofusbutt ass asshole blah blah blah."

your tears are delicious, do not waste them as moisturizer

[wiretap]

no drugs.

please stop eating my tears..... .. . .

[zoosmell]

i dunno...
sherlock uses them and he seems ok?
it's not like i'm that interested but i really want a good sandwich.

n....... .. . n.....o.....?

[wiretap]

you can have a good sandwich.
without the drugs.

[zoosmell]

oh.
is it really bad if i try a little?

[wiretap]

yes.