☩ ００８． ＶＩＤＥＯ | ＡＣＴＩＯＮ

[mansuetus]

[ Lucrezia is in one of the lounges! Sprawled on one of the sofas, fingers busy turning a pendent of gold in the shape of a sea-horse. There are no poems today, no joyful greetings, something is different. She looks more pensive than anything else but there is a shade of concern there as well as quiet annoyance.

When she speaks, her voice is devoid of any of it. Her eyes still focused on the sea-horse. ]

A riddle, Tranquility.

How to mourn for someone who does not deserve it?

If your duty demands it and you have no desire to - do all men need to be mourned for? Is it a a more grievous sin not to mourn than it is to speak false words of grievance?

[ a beat. ]

Perhaps I must fast again.

[ a moment later she puts down her necklace, smiles. ]

I would have a cup of wine with your answer, if any of you have some to spare. You will join me in the lounge.

[ and it is not a question. ]

Comments

video ]

[licks]

It has different purposes for different people, different situations.

It's supposed to make it easier, to give it a word that makes sense of everything you're feeling. The confusion, anger, and the hurt. Mourning is supposed to give you time to deal with all of those feelings.

It just doesn't work all the time.

If you don't have those feelings, if you're not really grieving then mourning will just give you time.

video ]

[mansuetus]

My Holy Father says that when one mourns, one must pray for the soul of the deceased. So it shall arrive to heaven and not hell. And if there is no one mourning, what then?

[ she frowns, still unsure if she cares at all. ]

video ]

[licks]

Do you honestly believe that it's up to you to provide someone that sort of ... relief? That there isn't something else out there making those choices?

Isn't that what religion is meant to do? Give you the answers to the questions no one wants to answer for themselves?

video ]

[mansuetus]

I am a daughter of the Church, I do believe that. Yet - I do not know if a false prayer would do well for anyone's soul.

video ]

[licks]

Then don't pray at all.

video ]

[mansuetus]

Shall it not hurt my soul when the time will come for my judgement?

[ but she smiles, the question half a jest. ]

video ]

[licks]

[Kate smirks.]

I don't think you have anything to worry about. Probably better to just be honest with yourself.

video ]

[mansuetus]

[ there is a small smirk on her own lips, perhaps inspired as a reply. ]

Deceiving oneself and others is a sin. I suppose honesty can never quite be one.

video ]

[licks]

Being honest might hurt sometimes, but there's nothing inherently wrong with it.

video ]

[mansuetus]

What is better? Dishonesty that might cause no pain or honesty that would cause quite a bit?

video ]

[licks]

Even if you think you're protecting them now... [Kate gets quiet for a moment.]

If they find out you lied to them, it will hurt more.

video ]

[mansuetus]

I care nothing for protecting them. But I fear that if pray to God for their soul then He would know it is a false request and I would be deemed a liar.

[ she smiles. ]

But we have already spoke of prayers.

video ]

[licks]

We have. [Kate takes a moment, pulling in a slow breath.]

It's your grief. You should handle it however you're most comfortable.

video ]

[mansuetus]

I thank you, for your kind words.

video ]

[licks]

Of course.