teashop: (♙ tea all the god damn day)
♙ HATTER ([personal profile] teashop) wrote in [community profile] ataraxion2012-08-28 10:41 pm

ANONYMOUS TEXT ♙ OO4

Dear interested parties,

Are you suspicious? Do you feel lied to? Paranoid? Do you have questions? Do you demand answers?

Worry not. For a price, you may be the lucky receiver of a vial of purest Honesty. This singular liquid guarantees the intended recipient tell nothing but the very naked truth. With this glorious solution in hand, you may rest easy knowing that all of your questions will soon be answered - for better or for worse.

One fl oz per vial. One drop is equal to one hour of Honesty. Mixable with other drinks. Use wisely.

This transaction will be treated as an auction; the bidding will end in five days' time. Paper payment won't be accepted. Favours won't be accepted. I'll decide the highest bidder. Your purchase and payment will both be delivered to a place of my choosing.

Bidding begins now.
stimulations: (virtual | and what shoulder)

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[personal profile] stimulations 2012-08-29 03:06 am (UTC)(link)
And how are we to know this 'Honesty' is what you say it is?

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runshouse: (constantly confounded by dicks)

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[personal profile] runshouse 2012-08-29 03:07 am (UTC)(link)
PER vial, huh?

[ REALLY GLAD HE DOESN'T HAVE TO DRINK, HE GUESSES? ]
Edited 2012-08-29 03:07 (UTC)

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blunted: (Default)

COMMENT NOT HERE;

[personal profile] blunted 2012-08-29 03:11 am (UTC)(link)
[ BUT WOW THIS IS THE FUCKING WORST ]
altercate: (Default)

permatext!!

[personal profile] altercate 2012-08-29 03:11 am (UTC)(link)
[ derek thought long and hard about this answer. ]

Bullshit.

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cloy: (pic#3320091)

SENT TO HATTER'S INBOX | what is a privacy filter

[personal profile] cloy 2012-08-29 03:13 am (UTC)(link)
[ For the first time since it was offered, Ros finds herself actually grateful for the read-aloud function Banner devised for her benefit. Her tone is quite obviously amused, both kittenish and coy in its overtones. ]

Somethin' tells me, you're about t'become quite popular, aren't you. What else've you got in that hat'f yours, I wonder. It's a proper bag'f tricks.
adlered: (♛ ɢᴏᴛᴛᴀ ʜᴏʟᴅ ᴏғ ᴍʏ ᴘᴏssᴇssɪᴠᴇ ᴍɪɴᴅ)

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[personal profile] adlered 2012-08-29 03:13 am (UTC)(link)
I do think you're going to make a number of people very angry with this.

[ note how she does not say i'm mad. even if she might be out of the running as far as bidding goes. ]

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deprecate: (as they watched us slowly part)

voice.

[personal profile] deprecate 2012-08-29 03:18 am (UTC)(link)
Are you fucking serious?

[ He's pretty much never drinking anything again. ]

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heterophobe: (explain ♂ tell you where to stick it)

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[personal profile] heterophobe 2012-08-29 03:19 am (UTC)(link)
Christ. Not this shit again. [ oh hey, accidentally voice, get outta here. ]

Do you have anything worth bidding for? Like say, a vial that (instead of making you feel a certain way, or act) actually changes something about you?

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likehuman: (it's not pretty there.)

aaaudio.

[personal profile] likehuman 2012-08-29 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
..Way to make everyone else paranoid as all hell.

[raise your hand if you're one of us.]

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cheerioless: (Default)

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[personal profile] cheerioless 2012-08-29 03:38 am (UTC)(link)
Right, because this isn't suspisious at all.

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certainproclivity: (Tom Green can hump a dead moose.)

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[personal profile] certainproclivity 2012-08-29 03:44 am (UTC)(link)
[Well, that's interesting. Not that Sark has any immediate use for the vial, but he can think of ways it could come in handy... and he doesn't particularly want anyone else to have it.]

So we merely toss our valuables into this auction and whatever you have most need of wins the prize?
wont: (PIGEON)

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[personal profile] wont 2012-08-29 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
[ Way to make the medieval princess paranoid, Hatter. ]

How does one measure the price of honesty?
It almost seems the start of a riddle.

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bruxisms: (your grammar is worrisome)

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[personal profile] bruxisms 2012-08-29 04:29 am (UTC)(link)
[ perhaps somewhat clumsily written ]

And you expect INDIVIDUALS TO TAKE THE WORD OF A MAN WHO WILL NOT SHOW HIS FACE

[ he frowns as he attempts to turn the CAPS LOCK function off. ]

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[personal profile] compressibility 2012-08-29 04:45 am (UTC)(link)
Truth serum. This is a terrible idea.

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learnedtosmile: (016)

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[personal profile] learnedtosmile 2012-08-29 05:14 am (UTC)(link)
Because what this ship really needs right now is someone with a truth serum running around, who could spike anyone's drink at any time. Yeah. That won't cause any trouble.

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godofthemachine: (Hey kid I'm a computer)

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[personal profile] godofthemachine 2012-08-29 07:50 am (UTC)(link)
How cute - capitalizing on ignorance.
jurisimpudent: (pouty)

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[personal profile] jurisimpudent 2012-08-29 04:53 pm (UTC)(link)
[Edgeworth frowns, genuinely troubled by this. On the one hand, it seems to him wrong - a violation of one's basic rights. On the other hand...does one have a right to lie? If they could use such a thing in interrogations, say, it would be simple to find out who had killed Holmes, whether there was someone who was responsible for those disappearances...]

Only a fool buys a product without any guarantee of its efficacy.

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circumitus: She literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me. (tomorrow never knows)

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[personal profile] circumitus 2012-08-29 06:48 pm (UTC)(link)
for as suspicious as people already are, it seems something like that could be a valuable asset. and you're selling it?

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doggedly: (pic#3067336)

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[personal profile] doggedly 2012-08-29 08:15 pm (UTC)(link)
can i have a chance at it if i tell you im still not impressed

or do i get disqualified

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falsehoods: (It was time to whip the god.)

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[personal profile] falsehoods 2012-08-29 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)
what would you consider payment if not favor

some haven't much to barter with

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chaineddog: (that i don't know ✗)

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[personal profile] chaineddog 2012-08-30 02:20 am (UTC)(link)
How do people know that you're not just some asshole ripping them off.

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amethysts: (cannery fellows follow her everywhere)

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[personal profile] amethysts 2012-08-30 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
So what do you take in payment? I'm interested.
heltersskelter: (h e r e | we are now)

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[personal profile] heltersskelter 2012-08-30 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
it's pretty damn hard to make a bid when we have no idea what you think is valuable, mr. spam
logicals: (⊱ I ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏᴘɪᴄ ᴛᴏ ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇ.)

[personal profile] logicals 2012-08-31 05:35 pm (UTC)(link)
You don't need a drug to pull honesty out of people. You just have to be smart enough to see it.
SH