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so if you see something that looks like mistletoe growing in the corner of your doorway
or elsewhere
DONT LET IT SEE YOU
DONT APPROACH IT especially with company
GET AWAY FROM IT or else set it on fire
carefully on fire
ill be along to take care of it later
thanks
[as part of the aftermath of space christmas, there may be some vicious mistletoe hanging around in certain doorways. some of it bites, and some of it growls, and some of it pursues you until you kiss the person you ran into on your way into the kitchen. classic wizard mistletoe prank gone slightly awry but also it's still funny. mistletoe began concentrated mostly on level 5, but it's spread itself upwards and downwards. and into the SEC offices. and elsewhere. feel free to say that you have been assaulted or do some threads of being assaulted in this post/your inboxes/useful log created for this purpose.]
or elsewhere
DONT LET IT SEE YOU
DONT APPROACH IT especially with company
GET AWAY FROM IT or else set it on fire
carefully on fire
ill be along to take care of it later
thanks
[as part of the aftermath of space christmas, there may be some vicious mistletoe hanging around in certain doorways. some of it bites, and some of it growls, and some of it pursues you until you kiss the person you ran into on your way into the kitchen. classic wizard mistletoe prank gone slightly awry but also it's still funny. mistletoe began concentrated mostly on level 5, but it's spread itself upwards and downwards. and into the SEC offices. and elsewhere. feel free to say that you have been assaulted or do some threads of being assaulted in this post/your inboxes/useful log created for this purpose.]
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How do I know it's just mistletoe and not something else I'm not meant to be freezing
[ not that he doesn't trust you or anything. ]
text
text
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didnt have to insinuate
video
There you are, one visual confirmation for freezing purposes. Say 'hello', mistletoe--
video
Has it got one eye?
[ somehow weirder than having two. ]
video
but Sirius is actually thinking about mistletoe which is why the shot remains focused on said mistletoe.]
'Course it has. How else is it going to see without an eye?
[only a bit of fumbling before he manages a slow zoom in. the shot gets a little grainier as it gets closer.]
Nice shade of green, though, isn't it. Only took four tries.
video
[ but also what four tries. ]
How much of it did you actually make?
video
[defensive, but--honesty compels him to finish that:] At first. But then it was reproducing in the wrong shade of green, and-- well, that's how we ended up with the different varieties. I did three in the wrong shade, but one of those three also ended up with teeth. Took out the teeth for the next one, still wrong colour--and he was a growler. And so on and so on.
Teeth, one eye, growl, nice colour green--he's a forth try. I can tell.
[very proud thanks]
video
You do realize mistletoe hasn't got any teeth. Or eyes, or— it isn't supposed to growl.
[ and he could actually be mad about this for like a century so mOVING ON. ]
You should get out of the room, first. Make sure you shut the door behind you, it'll help the room cool faster.
video
[and doesn't that sound boring now that you know life could be.]
Oh, come on--can't you do it while I'm in the room, I want to see it happen! At least with the door open. What's the point in being able to freeze things remotely if you can't let people see you doing it!
[he's turned the video back around to focus on himself--and also blessedly zoomed back out again, so this is actually a more-than-nostrils shot. instead, it's a Slightly Disappointed shot.]
video > ACTION SURPRISE
[ although. ]
Wait there.
[ and then he disappears from the screen before remembering to come back and switch it off, and then all calls will be absolutely ignored until he shows up on the twelfth floor, juggling a tablet and some sort of small canister in his hands while trying to pocket his comm. ]
Can you get very close to it?
ACTION SCREAMS
Sirius has just come around to staring dejectedly at the patch of growling mistletoe and resigning himself to just doing magic, like always, but then he hears some footsteps, and looks around. Oh.
Oh, he thinks, again, and bugger--]
Stop!
SCREaMS
He still stops fairly quickly after that warning, turning a bemused look to Sirius. ]
What?
[ Except he knows what. "Don't approach it", wasn't it? He manages to sound skeptical, anyway. ]
Surely it can't do anything from this distance.
no subject
[loudly, sharply, with the international gesture for sHUT THE FUCK UP (hand repeatedly pushed toward the floor, palm down, face contorted in a paroxysm of pain)]
It hasn't heard you yet! Thank Merlin, it's not-- [this had better not end horribly--] Just-- stay back there! Stay-- oh, for fuck's--
[the beady eye of the mistletoe is still screwed up in concentration toward Sirius, but there is a fumbly little vine of mistletoe moving along the ceiling, heading in Fitz's direction. frozen, Sirius still manages a scowl.
through his teeth:]
Stay. Still. Don't. Fuck. This. Up.
wow you're bringing it
Is that...
[ Which is about when the canister slides out of his grip, clattering to the floor with a series of loud clangs. To his credit ?? he doesn't move to pick it immediately, instead following orders and freezing in place. ]
Can't you magic it to death?
[ Technically a question, though it mostly just sounds like an accusation. It's also more of a stage whisper than a proper whisper, so not particularly stealthy. ]
i told you i would merry christmas
and the tendril of mistletoe is still moving, blindly, slithering its way across the ceiling.]
Nicely done. And yes, 'course I can, six ways to Sunday, but if it gets my wand and breaks it in bloody half in its enthusiasm--
[not even going to finish that sentence. he's got his wand at his side, held low and out of sight. tendril of mistletoe, now creeping down the wall. main plant still growling. Sirius narrows his eyes at his adversary, his creation.]
Was that canister what you were going to use to freeze it?
don't you mean merry christmas mj
Liquid nitrogen. Sort of like spot therapy, only instead of spots it's mistletoe. Figured it'd be a quick way to get around the "not freezing everybody in the room" issue, except you've got to get fairly close to use it, so...
[ Speaking of enthusiasm. He's fairly lost in the rant until he sees that the mistletoe's just a few feet away, and he trails off warily. ]
It isn't dangerous, though.
[ Say it isn't dangerous. ]
yes that is what i meant obviously merry christmas mj from us
[Night row gen. The word means absolutely nothing. And he's apparently lost Fitz to ardent explanation, and while he really very much does want to know how liquid night could freeze a specific bit of room, without the use of magic--]
Define 'dangerous'. And if your definition includes not death but also potential light strangulation and plant bites and kiss-ING--
[--the extra stress on that last bit comes because the mistletoe tendril moves quite suddenly, with a sound that can only be described as a dry slither as it shoots out to close the distance between itself and Fitz. Sirius jumps for the canister of liquid night and gives it a kick, in Fitz's direction--]
Night it, do it--
[He's got his wand up as he's kicking and shoots a quick scorch of fire in the direction of the main plant. It catches, and the plant makes an actual shriek, a little nails-on-chalkboard, but Sirius doesn't spare it a second glance, he's already looking to see what liquid night looks like--or, possibly, to stare with dread at the sight of Fitz caught by his creation, THERE HAD BETTER BE NO BLOODY KISSING NECESSARY--]
tosses words out the window
There's a sharp yank on his other arm as the tendril grabs hold of his wrist, abrupt enough for him to drop the black tablet he'd been cradling under his arm. ] Not my bloody—
[ Which starts out very irritated, then ends with a sharp yelp as the stupid thing bites his hand. Tablet and canister forgotten, he grabs hold of it with his free hand and gives it a yank, apparently opting for a tug-of-war approach to get it off. ] I thought you said you'd taken out the teeth!
[ Like that's the real complaint, here. False advertising. ]
saves a few for this thread tho
[The struggle for Fitz's wrist looks as if it's shaping up to be an epic one. The tendril, with its baby teeth, has no doubt felt the loss of its mother plant by now, which will only turn it more vicious.
Sirius has to risk it. The close proximity is a gamble, but it's one he's willing to take (more or less--if there were another way, he'd probably take it, because mistletoe kissing is for girls, and he means that non-disparagingly--).]
Just give it your wrist, its teeth are too small. It's not going to have your arm out.
[Canister, there, where it's been dropped, and Sirius shoves his wand in his back pocket and dives for it, comes up with the thing clutched to his chest. Success.]
What do I do with it? How does-- argh--
[The last bit is more of a growl, as a new tendril of mistletoe snakes around his ankle. Sirius leans his leg down, hard, trying to crush it between leg and floor--there's an angry hiss, from around the corner, which is where the mistletoe is reaching from.]
Tell me, now--