ataraxion | [video and text attachment]

Good day. My name is Miles Edgeworth; I am with the Security team. As ever, I would like to request that any new arrivals with expertise in law enforcement, the military, or combat contact me to discuss potential employment.

[He would also like to request that all you dicks stop talking about The Worst Holiday Ever, thanks. And he would like to distract you from it with this:]

I should like, also, to discuss our backgrounds. I have done this in the past, I will grant, and as such I beg a bit of patience from those who have previously seen such questions. Nevertheless, I believe that discovering the commonalities amongst us will assist in the uncovering of the reason why we were brought here; more, a general census will, I think, assist in preventing people from falling through the cracks, as it were.

[And it will GET YOU BASTARDS TO SHUT UP ABOUT CHRISTMAS FOR FIFTEEN GODDAMN SECONDS]

I have attached a text document. Kindly open this document, fill it out, and submit it to me. Note that number five is quite optional, but an answer would be appreciated and potentially quite helpful.

1. Your name: 2. Your age: 3. Your occupation: 4. Your level of education: 5. (Optional) Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness? (Note: This can be either professional diagnosis or self-diagnosis.): 6. Have you ever been involved in crime or criminal activity (either as victim of same or as perpetrator)?: 7. Have you ever been involved in violence or a violent act (either as victim of same or as perpetrator)?: 8. How long have you been here?:

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[~~if this ship is run by the Hal 9000 she quits~~]

Great. Our lives are in the hands of an AI. And I thought I've seen more than my fair share of crazy.

A...brief piece of advice, ma'am; don't use that tone of voice when talking about A.I.s. There are several robots amongst the passengers who will jump at any chance to take offense, and arguing with them is far more trouble than it is worth.

[DAMMIT]

... Robots. [Throwing her hands up in the air.] Got it. Thanks for the heads up.

So, anyways about that security team! What does the job entail exactly? Patrolling, making sure we don't turn on each other or the like?

Precisely so. There are few crimes committed on-board, so the investigatory arm of the department is rarely called into action, but that is also an aspect of our duties: we investigate crimes.

That I can do.

[And might as well show some legitimacy and qualification, so she takes out her badge and holds it up for him to see.]

Lieutenant Abigail Mills from Sleepy Hollow, New York. I was pretty busy back home so I might as well be productive here too.

[Ah. He eyes that badge, and her, with much greater interest.]

Good day, Lieutenant Mills. Miles Edgeworth. I'm merely the clerk for the department; all volunteers are reviewed by the head of our department, Tyke. You are willing to sit for an interview?

Is it a lengthy progress? I'm willing either way though, so take that as a yes.

Fifteen minutes, no more. Merely to gain a sense of your character and to ensure that you can handle yourself in a fight, if it comes down to it.

At the very least, I'd like to think I'm an interesting character. I'll let this Tyke decide that though.

As you say. Have you any other questions?

[OOC: You can just handwave the interview and go and sign her up over here!]

[There's a short pause before she asks (tentatively so)]

I do have one more question. It's umber five on the survey you posted up; have people here been diagnosed with a mental illness before or is that just putting it out there?

[And he answers, levelly:]

There are no diagnoses of which I am aware, Lieutenant; nor have I ever asked before. I ask now based on certain observations.

People are seeing things that shouldn't be there you mean?

[She gets that feeling a lot.]

Ah -

[With a bit of uncertainty - ]

No. That was not what I was referring to.

[Abbie raises a brow.]

Then what exactly are you referring to then Mr. Edgeworth?

I'm referring to the...generalized malaise which has come over the ship. Levels of aggression, depression, and anxiety exceed the norm.