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[The video kicks in all jumpy and uncertain, like whoever is recording with it either started the recording a bit too early, or else is far too excited to worry about things like proper recordings--just blurred room, generic Tranquility setting--and then, woosh, Sirius turns the video around all at once to focus on himself, grinning.]
Hullo, the ship! Have I got good news for you-- today, you’re the witness of a genuine certified miracle. I was doing a bit of investigating, since that's my job--see, you're in safe hands, the lot of you--and now instead I've found this, and suddenly it’s a bright new day of evils being undone, so dry your eyes and lock up your daughters-- dah nah nah naaah--
[Yes, that’s trumpet fanfare, and again, there’s the sickening swivel of the video turning around and here is Nathan Young. You know, the dead one? The one who very publicly died not three days ago? And here he is, in those same clothes (maybe they’re a little cleaner), and Sirius has hooked him up with a bar of space chocolate as well.]
Hello again, dear people of the Tranquility. I know we’re not all from the same planet, but if you’ve heard of Jesus, yes, it’s a bit like that. Only with better hair. [ Nathan will stand by that point, thanks. It's like a natural halo. He’s accordingly doing what might be considered a Jesus impression, tone and expression as close as he gets to magnanimous. The impact’s slightly ruined by it being Nathan, plus the fact that he was eating the chocolate and not paying attention when Sirius turned the camera on him, so there was a scramble to get into character. ]
Charming. Just charming. It’s brilliant, innit, but I found him just like this--and not dead! Which, for our listeners at home, indicates the miraculous restorative powers of this ship and possibly preludes an era of all-dead-things-coming-back-to-life. Resurrections every which way!
Or maybe the ship missed him so much, bless him, that it just couldn’t help itself and bestowed resurrection on him. Ahh, but does it matter! The awful events of days past have been undone, peace, love, and laughter, and joy hereafter, let’s all have a drink to celebrate. Cheers.
[ Nathan’s mostly just working on not breaking character in the background, and he almost manages. Before Sirius can finish, he leans into frame a bit more to offer an enthusiastic royal wave. Then he thinks of something, and somewhat hastily: ]
And if any of you devout young ladies would like to pay proper respects, come on by my room. That’s floor thirteen, door sixty-nine. And that is a promise.
[the conclusion to the gross death of nathan from a few days back! (tw for descriptions of violence & suicide) nathan has been resurrected by the power of... well, himself. sirius, blue is nathan, replies to come to you from either/both. threadjacking is okay! also TW for possible discussion of death, violence, self-harm and suicide in the comments - peruse at your risk!]
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You assholes!
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[ nathan's concept of entertainment is probably kind of skewed. to be fair, he's used to his friends back home rolling their eyes when he falls from deadly heights, so there's been some encouragement here. ]
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[Solemnly, he holds a finger to his lips. This is a sacred space of miracles, that's what that gesture says. Please respect it.]
Not so loud, please, you'll wake the dead. Oh, hang on--
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[ missing the point of jesus slightly. ]
permatext;
permavid!
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[He breaks off, his voice shaking. A beat, and then, more calmly:]
But I don't think there's much point, given that you two have your heads so far up your asses I don't think you could hear a word I said.
You can have the room, Sirius, but I think I'll be moving out for now.
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[He mutters that, first. Nearly half of the irritation in those words is thanks to the prickle of guilt that he feels. There had been some misgivings in staging this, and Remus was a part of that misgiving--but like he's going to linger there. This is an hour of triumph. He who once was dead has risen, which creeped Sirius out more than a bit, and he's not going to talk about waiting around nervously for it to happen, or the process of watching the death happen in the first place--
Instead, he snorts.]
You're not actually serious, you're moving out over this? C'mon, Moony, you know what this was. [A joke, he means, but, unwilling to let this go just yet, he says:] A miracle.
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if any of what remus says sticks, it doesn't show. nathan is surprised by remus's response, and that tempers the ego somewhat. but he also still sounds amused, which negates any appeasing edge in his tone. ]
Hey, it's alright, calm down— if I'd known you were in love with me, I never would've played with your heart this way.
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And yes, it's not seen many times here but Lucrezia Borgia is very angry. ]
It would take the two most ignorant, proud fools to think of comparing themselves to our Lord Christ or to think it in any way amusing.
[ she had spent an hour crying about it, she prayed for your blasphemous asses. ]
It is not resurrection, you would name it so. Pride is the worst of all cardinal sins and not only to those who follow our Holy Mother Church. Consider hubris, the pair of you. And consider where you are and what force shall be dealing your retribution for this now and in what form it'll come.
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1. Lucrezia is angry (?), tangentially, with him
2. Lucrezia is going to meet Nathan
...well. One problem at a time.]
It's not--oh, that Jesus thing, that was only-- oh, come on, Lucrezia, it isn't pride. It was someone coming back to life, miraculously, after dying. Isn't that brilliant! It's completely brilliant.
[please agree that it's brilliant please please please]
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You have a power right, or is this Black's magic? You know, it doesn't matter, does it? And playing Jesus? I tell you what, throw yourself out an airlock and make it good this time.
Waste of fucking air.
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[Solemnly, he shakes his head.]
Anyway, it's not anything to do with me. I found him, I was patrolling around and I found him. Which I've said, but as you're so ready to misinterpret everything...
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Are you both currently present in this room
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in which room
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[ Clearly this is some elaborate stunt, right? A disturbing and incredibly tasteless stunt. ]
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Or, well, we weren't playing at it. I wasn't, Nathan certainly wasn't--it's just a happy circumstance of resurrection. A miracle of the highest caliber.
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[seriously, nathan. bad idea.]
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Or was it the bit about the hair that offended.
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Just this face.
...Well this is intense.]
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Sirius answers with video, for once--no "anonymous" texts today--and after a few seconds of staring back, he raises one hand to wave quite solemnly.]
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Pretty sure Jesus went about things a little differently.
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Yeah? Were you there? No. So don't you tell me what Jesus did and didn't do. People shit themselves when they die, you know. Do they ever say Jesus shat himself in the Bible? No.
[ so clearly it's all bullshit. very clean line of logic. ]
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[ and faith knows from stupid. ]
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Or maybe it's the Second Coming. Who're you to say, really?
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[no really heather didn't let him on the comms for a while there]
You died and then you're back?
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[This was all kind of insanely triggering for the elfdad but like hell is he going to just let the collateral damage start happening.]
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video. quickest thread i am so sorry nate my boy
omg you tell him precious child
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There are children who could've seen that. Not to mention anyone that's had friends commit suicide.
It was cruel, petty, and hurtful. Why did you do it?
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Jesus, more with the lectures. You'd see worse on BBC after watershed, I can't see how one little film's going to ruin anyone's life.
[ see also: he doesn't really have an answer. ]
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Two things. One: where did you get that gun? [ That's more important. But he smiles a little, sharp-edged. ] Two: do you always come back, or do you get to control it a little?
[ You can't commit suicide on this ship without the one actually suicidal person wanting to repeat it. Without the resurrection bit. ]
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I pulled it out of my anus.
[ said offhand, though there's some attitude in it. he's not giving you his dealer, sorry. that'd also be ratting out sirius, though it's probably going to be easy for SEC to connect the dots. ]
And two: what the fuck do you mean by control it a little. It's dead or not dead, man, it's kind of all or nothing. [ a beat, then: ] Do you mean can I stay dead?
[ confused is quickly slipping into mildly disturbed at the realization. ]
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video; I'm so sorry you have to deal with him, Nathan
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nowhere
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text; locked at like 10% because what is technology
text; locked at like 10% lmao sirius
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[ he must heal, obviously, but he's never actually around for that part. ]
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video; private to the best friend sorry nathan;
[ sirius, explain, though james definitely looks more curious and slightly entertained than anything. ]
video; private OTP filter xoxo
Not that he'd admit that aloud, not to anyone. Who wants to say that a good portion of their raison d'etre is amusing this other bloke. Wow, lame.
So instead he smiles, a tight proud little smile, and affects a terribly casual shrug.]
Hullo, James, this is my mate Nathan and he isn't dead, which is a prank.
Surprise.
[Laugh please!]
video; private yes exactly xoxoxoxoxo
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