video;

[rubblegoddess]

[Hello, everyone! It's late, late night, and you're now being treated to the sight of... bare skin!? What?

Yes, it's bare skin, a bit out of focus, but that's what it is. The holder of the device sighs in what she hopes is a thoughtful manner.]

I know the science of it, the biology, yes, but I don't like it. Legs are troublesome enough...

[The feed is flipped over to reveal a young woman with dark, mussed hair and a haughty look. She sounds completely perturbed, but somehow bored at the same time.]

...inefficient as they are. This is a nuisance.

[Camera back to skin, camera back up. Yes, by now you may have figured out that she's showing off one slender leg.]

There's hair. On my leg. On both legs, actually. I don't know whether to be fascinated by the wonder of the human body or completely disgusted.

Comments

[briefly]

Oh, dear. Don't you hate it when they're like that?

[rubblegoddess]

It's irritating. I think he may still be angry about how we met.

[briefly]

Please do tell me all about it, darling.

[rubblegoddess]

[SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO LISTEN!!!!

Wait, this is classified......]

Well, I startled him. I needed his help so I solicited it a bit rudely.

[briefly]

I do have to wonder what classifies as rude for someone like you.

[rubblegoddess]

...Partial disablement of his vehicle.

[briefly]

Hm. That doesn't sound so bad.

[rubblegoddess]

It was in space at the time.

[briefly]

... In space.

So you're. Experienced.

[rubblegoddess]

Well, I was an AI.

[briefly]

Oh, yes, of course! Silly of me to overlook that part.

[rubblegoddess]

I don't think I've yet elaborated on that point.

Shall I introduce myself? [Give her a moment to work up some dramatic tension, something she's discovered gets interesting reactions from people.] I am former UNSC AI Juliana, steward of the planet Madrigal, goddess of the Rubble, etc. etc.

Usually I'm one to skip formal introductions, but it's so much more fun here.

[briefly]

Oh, dear. I wasn't quite aware that AIs cae with such a variety of titles. Or are you simply... special that way?

[rubblegoddess]

[Oh you have no idea how... Special she is. Very, very special.]

Well, we're usually busy taking care of things, processing this and that. I'm beyond that usefulness here, so I might as well be a little self-promoting, don't you think?

[briefly]

[Hm. Well.]

Of course. God forbid anyone overlook our good qualities just because we're not using them.

[rubblegoddess]

Precisely. I'm very organized, and being benevolent is on the low end of my generosity spectrum.

[briefly]

But you're no longer an AI, are you.

[rubblegoddess]

Well.... No. I'm approximately human now.

[briefly]

Does your personality remain the same? I mean - you're no longer programmed to be a certain way anymore.

[rubblegoddess]

I'm what is commonly termed a "smart" AI. We are almost human in some ways, selecting our own personalities and appearances. We reflect the people we are made from, I'm sure, but on the whole... Well, we're close enough.

In short, yes. I was like this before.

[briefly]

Sorry, I'm only guessing here. You can imagine I've never met - anyone quite like you before.

[Pause.]

Did you have the potential to be changed by your surroundings? Or was it all a matter of your own choices?

[rubblegoddess]

Of course. Like humans, we grow and learn; absorbing information and processing it accurately and quickly is our primary function. You can't imagine how it "feels" to know so many things and to just... yes. Just to know that you know.

I made a lot of choices. Maybe they were questionable to the outside view. But I made them.

[briefly]

[Another pause. She's thinking.]

Do you still carry all that information with you? Must be hard to remember everything now.

[rubblegoddess]

[SIIIIIIGH. She now seems suddenly genuinely distressed, and her voice is strained. THis is a sore subject for Juliana.]

It's there but it's difficult to access it. The human mind is so slow. And I feel like it's too difficult to learn more. I keep trying to memorize such trivial things and it's not working as well as I'd like.

[Not that part of that can't be attributed to her Rampancy, but... details.]

[briefly]

I'm sorry to hear that.

[And she does sound genuine, too.]