ataraxion | 0000 : 01 : VIDEO

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0000 : 01 : VIDEO

[ click! as the device starts recording. the screen is filled by a strange, helmeted visage -- all features completely obscured, just shiny black material and smooth curves. a pause, as the figure tilts is head slightly, then speaks in a curious, electronically-masked voice. ]

What a strange vessel.
Lacking in New-U stations,
psychos and midgets.

[ and then a brief pause before his helmets project a holographic image -- a bright red :) that floats before the glossy surface. ]

I seek a way home.
But until then, for hire:
Expert assassin.

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Aw, man. This place is stupid crowded with mercs.

We oughta form a club.

[ pause, as he seems to mull over that a bit. and then: ]

A club of killers?
For the purpose of teamwork?
Or perhaps to fight?

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[BECAUSE HE'S BORED]

S. S. Horrorfuck
No way out, sorry brosef
Expert? I doubt it.

No way out? We'll see.
I don't give up easily.

[ pause. and then his faceplate flickers a :| ]

And you're not my 'bro.'

permatext because he's a troll

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My haiku has five,
seven, five, syllables. That's
correct, isn't it?

[ upgrading his smiley from :) to :D ]

Yes, that is correct.
Just seventeen syllables.
Brief and to the point.

perma-text!

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Y-Y-You're an assassin?! For real?

[Larry shrinks back from his communications device as if it had turned into a poisonous spider.]

[ have a long, super intense stare right into the camera, his helmet surface blank. and then: ]

For real.

[video]

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Do you always only speak in haikus or is this just you being bored?

It's true that I'm bored,
but that is unrelated
to how I converse.

voice;

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voice;

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voice;

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voice;

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voice;

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subtle.

I've nothing to hide.
Why bother with subtlety?
I seek a challenge.

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No assassins are necessary.

[ helmet holograph: :( ]

Boring.

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jurisimpudent - 2012-10-19 02:42 (UTC) - Expand

You might want to ditch the red smiley dude, might get some mistaken identity.

[ helmet holograph: :/ ]

I will 'ditch' nothing.
Who people mistake me for
is not my problem.

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0000 - 2012-10-14 18:31 (UTC) - Expand

Chop squad assassin, or the clean sneak type?

I do what it takes.
Sniper shot or death by blade,
either way is fine.

voice;

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But why would you announce that to the network?

Also: bonus points for the haiku! A completely underappreciated form of poetry, in my opinion.

A silly question.
People cannot hire what
they don't know exists.

text;

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video. SHIT I MEANT video the whole time whoops

0000 - 2012-10-16 00:53 (UTC) - Expand

text; S'OKAY

fraud - 2012-10-19 23:31 (UTC) - Expand

That red's gonna raise some eyebrows, bo. More than the assassin schpeil.

Edited 2012-10-14 02:40 (UTC)

[ sounding a little irritable: ]

I've been told as much.
I feel like I've been copied.

[ pause. ]

Not too pleasing, 'bo.'

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Advertising your criminal ways so boldly. Impressive.

I've no reason to hide.

Audio

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If you think we are lacking in 'psychos and midgets' you definitely have not been here long.

A contradiction.
I've heard there's no killing here.
Psychos only kill.

Text; Because he's obnoxious and trying not to be attached to his ID

theredchampion - 2012-10-15 15:04 (UTC) - Expand

perma-video since it's annoying typing when you're short a finger :|

0000 - 2012-10-16 00:41 (UTC) - Expand

Suck it up psychopath

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[Eyes...narrow...]

Strange combination.

... of what?

[ what are you talking about, everything he said makes total sense. ]

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coarse - 2012-10-25 22:53 (UTC) - Expand

Two things!

1) Let's stick with :D if you're going to, I guess smile? Seriously the whole helmet thing makes it a little hard to tell if that's the real emotion or not. And nice job on the voice, by the way. I'd say I'm a little jealous but I've heard better.

2) How expert are we talking?

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