anonymous text | backdated to the twenty-fifth

[amethysts]

Title: The Long Reacharound of Justice
Pairings: Miles Edgeworth/Justice, Carver Hawke/Anders (background)
Rating: They don't fuck like right out in the open (NO KIDS ALLOWED)
Summary: Miles Edgeworth can't resist the call of Justice...
Author: Mockingbird



"No!" The fiery, cravat wearing prosecutor insisted, turning his head away and throwing an arm over his eyes. "I mustn't! I must stay pure for the law! And what about Carver Stabber? What would Anders Butters think?"

"Anders is of no concern," Justice Lawfulness boomed, in his awesome and super badass voice, "We have an...understanding about the use of this body. Besides, I look better in it."

Indeed he did. Shirtless and oiled up with lots of like, fucking expensive oils that smelled good, Ander's Butters' dumbass ponytail removed so his auburn hair could flow slightly in the breeze of a vent overhead in Miles' Kilometres' room. He was amazingly fuckable. Like a nun would fuck him. But Miles Kilometres was even worse than a nun.

"I'm a virgin!" Miles Kilometres confessed, weeping delicate tears as Justice Lawfulness took him into his strong, justice-filled arms and pressed a kiss to his mouth, and the kiss was totally fucking hot too. You'd need steel tongs to handle that kiss. Miles Kilometres couldn't struggle any longer.

"I'll crush your virginity like I crush wrongdoing," Justice Lawfulness said, and ripped open Miles' Kilometres' shirt and wrecked his stupid cravat and no one ever missed it because it looks absolutely fucking stupid, for fuck's sake Edgeworth Nedgewart when you read this and you better read it lose that thing.

Moving on.

"Oh, Justice Lawfulness!" Miles Kilometres crooned, as Justice Lawfulness carried him to bed and ravished the everloving fuck out of him. Just ravished for hours. Tons of ravishing. And it was incredibly hot and they used blueberry flavoured condoms for oral. After, they had pie. It was delicious. Miles' Kilometres' virginity was crushed like injustice.

[locked to jesse, syg, and mouse | not anon | text]

LMAO buds look at this edgey has a boyfriend

[This all is why Libby should never be bored and drunk at the same time.]

Comments

reaction 1/?

[jurisimpudent]

reaction 2/?

[jurisimpudent]

reaction 3/?

[jurisimpudent]

reaction 4/5

[jurisimpudent]

reaction 5/5

[jurisimpudent]

text

[jurisimpudent]

I know who you are

anon text

[amethysts]

Wow, bold and underlined?

text because he lost his voice from roaring in rage

[jurisimpudent]

Libby, take this down at once.

text, not anon

[birdhousesoul]

Edgeworth? Anders here. I listened to the conversation you had with Justice.

I'm sorry he's been vocal. He's gotten more active, these past months, but this is different. I have to consider the possibility that whatever brought us here, something might have happened to jar him loose. Looser.

Please understand he's got no designs on anyone whatsoever, not like this bit of friend fiction has it sounding. Someone I used to know wrote this sort of thing all the time, and that's what she called it, friend fiction. Always thought she invented the concept.

text

[jurisimpudent]

I know that. All of this is nothing more than the ravings of a demented mind.

t e x t

[snaketrap]

[ And you are afraid of Loki why? Granted his trickery can kill, but he does enjoy a wide variety. ]

Oh my.

anon text

[amethysts]

[She'll get over it, surely.]

Meticulously researched, I assure you.

text

[snaketrap]

[ He can't -- ugh, keeping appearances. It is so hard to do, right now. His life. A sad tale indeed. ]

If so then that must mean... Can it be -- are you justice? [ everyone gasps in shock of this. ]

Anders is no typist but he'll have to text for this he supposes

[birdhousesoul]

[Anders knows better than to respond.

He knows better. He really does.

He's been friends with Isabela for how many years now? Isabela, who's written so-called friend fiction about virtually all her acquaintances in various unlikely permutations? Admittedly, he used to enjoy the friend fiction about himself and Garrett, before they let themselves become a couple.

Letting Isabela see a reaction, any reaction, would practically ensure a sequel even filthier than the first. It was always best to laugh it off. The same should be true with ... whoever wrote this.

And yet. There is an inaccuracy in this friend fiction that Anders cannot allow to stand.

True, Justice doesn't ravish anyone ever. That isn't the objectionable bit. Nor is the involvement of Carver worth mentioning; at least it's only Carver, as opposed to a horrible daisychain of Sebastian, Fenris, Carver, Thrask the templar, and Hubert from the Bone Pit. What's objectionable is THIS:]

My hair is not auburn. It's blond.

[Might be easier to tell what color it is if you'd wash it more often, Anders, honey.]

And my ponytail does have its admirers, thanks.

[Granted, none of them is ... aboard this ship ... or likely ever to be, as far as Anders is aware ... and even if any were, they'd probably have no interest in ever speaking to Anders again, let alone admiring his ponytail ... but it's the principle of the thing.]

[amethysts]

[...of all the things Anders is irritated by--that, seriously? Libby makes a mental note that the sequel has to involve more hair chat, and that it's forever going to be auburn.

She has nothing against Anders, he seems okay. He also seems like he can take a joke.]

Auburn sounds better. Also, it's more appropriate, since Miles is fiery and so is Justice.

It's like you think I didn't think it through. Did your glowing friend tell you about his recent marriage?

[birdhousesoul]

Justice is a spirit. He doesn't understand human intimacy.

[Now Anders is just going to be afraid Justice has said or done something that someone interpreted as a marriage proposal.]

whoops, video~

[dashhole]

...The hell did I just read here?

video > text

[amethysts]

[Have a picture of a mockingbird, drawn in chalk, on a wall. Then text.]

Steamy hot sex.

video > text

[dashhole]

[TWO CAN PLAY THAT GAME, LIBNONAMOUS. There's just this look for like a fraction of a second, then he drops his comm on the bed and goes rustling around for something. There's a rustling noise, then he's back, picking up the comm to show off this picture.]

That wasn't steamy or hot.

audio;

[dirtyword]

There a point to posting this story?

anon text

[amethysts]

No. Why?

anon text

[dirtyword]

Then why'd you post it? [ Forever linefacing at things that aren't IMPORTANT FACTS. ]

Text;

[theblogger]

You're rather lucky he can't exactly sue you for slander.

[ He only actually read the first bit before skimming on. ]

anon text

[amethysts]

Libel, technically. I'm correcting you before he does.

Text

[theblogger]

Any particular reason for all this?