ataraxion | [text] eridan's guide to haircare

ok since its been ovver 120 days since people started showwin up on this ship i think its time to seriously address some basic fuckin problems goin on here
for those a you neww to this place basically you can disappear at any time an no one knowws if that means you go home or you just get eaten by some kind a monster or wwho the fuck knowws
theres also a mysterious room no one can find that has skeletons in it but wwhatevver that shit is pointless

heres the important part
its come to my attention despite me tryin to ignore it that a lot a you are startin to look pretty fuckin shaggy as far as hair goes
also gross
seriously take some a the basic ablution supplies an clean yourselvves up if i can smell you comin that means you need to showwer
anywway just because wwere stuck on this ship goin down the coddamn rivver styx doesnt mean that you cant look presentable

there are some scissors lyin around at least i managed to find somethin that wworks so maybe you all should take a fuckin page outta my book an get yourselvves cleaned up

if you dont knoww howw to cut your owwn hair one youre a complete failure
twwo i can do it for you
i wwont evven ask for anythin in return since people not lookin like shit is all the rewward i need
though if any a you got a good wway to get some dye set up i could use that

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

And free haircuts. You're practically a saint.

Like I said, wwhat am I gonna charge? Money's kinda fuckin' useless.

An exchange of goods would be possible.

Wwhat goods. I don't need anythin' people havve here, unless it's hair dye, like I said, so wwhat's the point'a dealin' wwith more crap people toss my wway?

You don't want anything?

Sure, I wwant plenty'a things, but nobody has them. Like a recuperacoon, an' some stylin' products, an' hair dye, an' my cape, some neww clothes...

[Pause.]

But none'a that's just gonna be up for trade, so wwhy bother? Besides, like I said. Makin' people not look fuckin' atrocious is a pretty good fuckin' trade-off, if you ask me.

You don't know unless you ask. There's all sort of possibilities, if you're resourceful.

I'vve already asked around for plenty'a that shit, an' most of it doesn't evven exist here. Though, if you do see my cape around here, purple an' all that, let me knoww an' I'll... trade somethin' for it, I guess. Since that's the only thing that might turn up here.

I'll have to keep my eyes out for it then.

Yeah, thanks, then. [AWKWARDLY] Uh, like I said, if you wwanna borroww these scissors I found or need help trimmin' your hair, let me knoww. In, like, return for you keepin' an eye out, or wwhatevver.

How kind. That would be lovely, thank you.

...Cool. Just lemme knoww wwhen you need 'em, I guess.

I'll be in touch.

[text] eridan's guide to haircare

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