voice.

[technologist]

I'm missing a Dwarf. [ The introduction's abrupt and distracted. It's also noticeably Scottish, and there's the sound of a locker banging shut before he continues. ] Not a dwarf-dwarf, it's a— it's a drone, and it's a very, very delicate piece of technology.

He's not responding to remote commands, so either he's been damaged or someone's— [ Someone's disabled it or shut it away somehow, which isn't a very charitable accusation. Fitz corrects himself for the sake of diplomacy. ] He's gotten himself stuck somewhere. About the size of a golf ball, black, blue lights. I've attached a picture. If you've seen it, please give me a call.

[ Losing important robots, great start. The feed ends as abruptly as it started, but Fitz picks it up again about half a second later to add a quick: ]

And if you've stolen one of the roombas, I'll be needing them as well.

[ Diplomacy!! As for the promised picture, he completely forgets it until a few minutes later. So, somewhat belatedly: grumpy.jpg. ]

Comments

[voice, private]

[jurisimpudent]

[ Edgeworth's voice is urgent. For a moment, he doesn't really register exactly who this is, and so - ]

May we please speak privately?

[voice, private]

[technologist]

[ Well, that's sort of an answer. Better than a roomba fixation. There's a slightly bemused pause while Fitz double-checks that the feed's already private. ]

Aren't we already?

[klutziness]

Who are you, the roomba king?

[technologist]

The roomba— [ Oh, that's sass. He follows. ] No, I'm not the roomba king. But unless you're planning to use the roombas to get us off this ship, I'd suggest you hand them over to someone who'll make good use of them.

[wiped]

Everyone says the roombas came with the ship.

[ did you bring roombas from home fitz ]

[technologist]

They did.

[ Nope, he sure didn't. ] But I need them for— science.

[ ... that phrase holds no value these days, does it. He means it unironically, thank you. ]

[priceoffreedom]

What is a roomba?

[technologist]

It's a hoover. [ Quick and a bit snappish, until he recognizes the number. And the voice. Abort mission. ]

I mean it's a— it's a robot. In the future they're used to clean our floors. [ Well. ] Very inefficiently.

voice.

[uncurse]

... How is that a dwarf?

voice.

[technologist]

It's an acronym, drones wirelessly automated to retrieve forensics. But the question is have you seen one?

[ A drone, not an actual Disney dwarf. Just to be clear. ]

voice

[alsohawkeye]

When did it go missing? And do you have any better photos? I can't tell if it's just one of the lights, or like the whole string of them.

voice

[technologist]

Before the last jump. I don't know when, exactly, I was a bit preoccupied. [ Getting lost in the hallways. She probably knows the feeling. ]

Each Dwarf has got several lights, it's... hang on. [ And a few seconds later, a better picture WHICH I DO NOT HAVE!! anyway it looks like a little baby UFO with a few legs. Better maybe?? ]

voice;

[cliver]

[ Grumpy, dwarf, oh that would be amusing if it wasn't missing. Proper English on her end. ]

Is it transmitting any data? We could try to track the signal.

[ We because she's with you now, Fitz. Protect robots at all costs. ]

voice;

[technologist]

[ Finally someone with some common sense. He still sounds a bit impatient, but he's grateful for the honest attempt at help. ]

I tried tracking him right out of the jump, but the system's a bit— [ Screwed up. Something about a horror ship, probably. ] I'm still working out a few Tranquility-related kinks. Thought there might be some merit in testing my fellow passengers' good samaritan status in the meantime.

[ Not impressed, so far. ]

[lostkings]

What if I want to keep one of the roombas as my very own?

[technologist]

Then you'd be a very selfish and inconsiderate person.

[ CALLING IT LIKE IT IS. Though he sounds mildly offended by that "what if", how dare you. ]

[kutte]

That's the best name you came up with? Dwarf?

[technologist]

[ Yet another in a train of unhelpful responses, so sounding very put-upon: ]

It's a bloody acronym.

voice;

[starbuckslord]

Grumpy, huh? You might need to rename it to Bashful or Dopey at this point.

voice;

[technologist]

Ship full of comedians, fantastic. [ Deeply regretting this entire transmission, though he sounds more frustrated and long-suffering than angry. ] And the name's Sneezy, by the way. Grumpy's right here.

not here

[endureandsurvive]

[INNOCENT WHISTLING. SHE HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.]

[technologist]

[ he's going to get your roomba too you jerk :c ]

voice;

[stimulations]

Stolen is a strong word for it, especially as I'm not sure you have any more right to them than anyone else.

voice;

[technologist]

Alright, yes, stolen's a strong word. Borrowed. Claimed, adopted, whatever they're calling it— unless they've got grand plans for the things, they shouldn't be hoarding parts.

[dissociable]

How did you lose Grumpy?

[ THINGS HE DID NOT SEE HIMSELF TYPING EVER BEFORE HE WAS MADE TO JOIN THIS TEAM OF COULSON'S UGH ]

[technologist]

I didn't lose Grumpy, I lost Sneezy. Grumpy's just the reference.

[ And a few seconds later. ]

And I didn't lose him. Someone stole Sneezy.

[brainsqueeze]

Where was it last?

[technologist]

[ Extremely obvious and slightly embarrassing questions. ]

Level 32 kitchen.

( text | anonymous )

[carbonite]

if u want the roombas back
u will have 2 win them back

( text ) HAHA jesus

[technologist]

[ Why are you all so weird about the roombas ?? ]

What the hell is that supposed to mean

voice.

[debts]

What's it do?

voice.

[technologist]

[ That's a familiar number. There's a slight delay, but his voice is almost at totally normal levels when he finally answers. ]

It smells. I mean it doesn't smell, it analyses odors. [ Very useful on the ship?? Probably not. ] I was planning on re-purposing it.

video;

[wolfdreamer]

The roombas don't belong to you.

[If it looks like he's laying against a pile of furs, that's just because there's a massive direwolf curled behind him. Not that you can tell that. Yet.]

They live free on this ship. But we will help you find your drone, if you need it.

video;

[technologist]

[ "Live freely".... first thing's first, actual offer of help. ] That's very kind of you, thanks. But I've got an idea where to look, now.

[ Difficult to decide what to start with, otherwise. Robot freedom? Ostentatious furs? ]

I never said they belonged to me. [ And after a thoughtful pause: ] I'd just like to fix them up, a bit.

voice; hello more tags 8]

[axeyou]

You know, you can make new friends.

voice; lays on them like smaug

[technologist]

Sorry? [ It takes him a second to catch on, then a bit defensively: ] They're drones, not friends. Very, very expensive drones.

[ Not that cost matters, here, but it's basically synonymous with "irreplaceable". ]

[Voice]

[the_other_eight]

Where was the last place you had it?

[Pepper is trying very hard not to sound like a mom right now.]

[Voice]

[technologist]

[ He may or may not have memorized all SHIELD-relevant numbers, give him a moment to respond calmly. ] Kitchens. Thirty-second floor, but it's— it's fine, I've found someone who thinks they've got him.

[ Or not so calmly, way too rushed. And very belatedly: ] But thank you.