(no subject)

[majestyofthethrone]

How do you keep faith, here? How do you remember that God wants...how do you keep some kind of faith, keep from losing your mind with the things that happen to us?

My whole life I've heard God; all I had to do was listen and there He was, like music, like a symphony, and even when I was at the height of being terrified, there He was just working the notes of this great symphony. But then I followed that music, I followed Grigori, and I did something and now I can't hear anything, for the first time I've lost God and I just want Him back-

What if I did was unforgivable? What if saving another person isn't enough? What if what I did has stained my soul?

How do I keep believing that God loves me when I can't hear Him anymore?

How do you keep faith?

Comments

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[majestyofthethrone]

How does that help anyone?

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[jondrette]

It does not. But what good is it praying to a man that will never listen to you? I am not bound for Heaven

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[majestyofthethrone]

He is not a man.

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[jondrette]

A man. A god. It makes no difference to me. Men think themselves gods.

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[majestyofthethrone]

But men are not gods and God is not a man.

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[jondrette]

I have met many who wish to believe they are

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[majestyofthethrone]

That has nothing to do with God.

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[jondrette]

God's abandonment left me to these men.

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[majestyofthethrone]

The actions of evil men are not the actions of God.

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[jondrette]

When I prayed for him to save me from them, he did nothing.

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[majestyofthethrone]

Did you only pray?

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[jondrette]

I prayed. I fought. I hoped and wished.

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[majestyofthethrone]

And nothing?

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[jondrette]

Only my death

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[majestyofthethrone]

I don't...have any power over death.

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[jondrette]

No one does. Except those who have power to cause it.