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Look. If this is a SHIELD bag and tag I'm really sorry, ok? For w/e it is that I did. Can I please go home now? I learned my lesson. If this is not a SHIELD punishment, did somebody's ASSHOLE BROTHER open an Einstein-Rainbow bridge into space? Like AN ASSHOLE?? Not cool.

[ That is not what a wormhole is called, Darcy. ]

More to the point, who do I have to blow* to get a beer around here? *No one is actually gonna get blown. sry not sry. pls give beer tho k tnx.

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[NO TELL ME MORE]

Darcy. And I'm Sirius Black. I dunno if I've said that either, getting together the box sort of took all of my attention--

[He holds out a hand to her, for a handshake, though he spares a nod at the dog biscuits.]

And I'd hold onto those, if I were you. You never know when they might come in handy, for any stray dogs or wolves lurking around. Of which there's an astonishing lot on this spaceship, by the way. Has anyone told you?

[ Sirius is not the strangest name Darcy has heard lately, but it does get a fractional lift of her eyebrows. The question as to whether or not she's been told about the surplus of wolves (and dogs, but dogs are cool) raises those brows again by whole lots. ]

Nnnnnoooo? There are strays roaming around on a spaceship? Why are there wolves?

Because of the Starks, that's why. They keep them as pets, or possible to ride around on, or possibly just to mildly terrorise people. And Merlin forbid you get even a toenail on their bad side, 'cos then you'll have a direwolf chaperone for the rest of your life. Maybe even after.

[He speaks, clearly, from personal experience--but the heaviness that comes with all of that lifts quickly, because now it's time to talk about stray dogs. Infinitely better and brighter topic, that.]

Stray dogs are perfectly friendly, though, and good company. If you see one, definitely give it a scratch behind the ears.

Starks? O-kay.

[ Proooobably not the Stark she knows. But it's not like Tony Stark has the monopoly on the surname. He's not that rich and influential. Talk of direwolves makes Darcy glad she's here to drink. ]

Starks bad, stray dogs good. I can remember that. Anything else I should know?

We-ell, not bad, just--

[He waves a hand, like, you know. She probably doesn't, but it's dismissive enough to indicate just how worried she ought to be.]

Er, let's see. Well, you can get a job, but you don't actually have to. There's this fellow called Nathan that gets on the network and makes lengthy speeches sometimes, but you can mostly ignore those. If a survey shows up on the network, you have to take it. Oh, yeah, incidentally, how d'you feel about radioactive rats?

[ She feels like she should be taking notes (call it habit), so she taps down just enough to help her recall what she was told later. Jobs, Nathan, surveys mandatory. ]

I... don't have any particularly strong feelings if they aren't infecting me with radiation poisoning or spreading the black plague, I guess.

Brilliant. 'Cos they're not so bad, when they're not trying to kill you. Or, well, I mean, they're always trying to kill you, a little, but from a safe distance that murderous rage is almost cute. I'll introduce you to Brunhilda later, if you like.

Anyways, we had some of those. Radioactive rats. And there were the manticores, but we might not actually be done with them-- and so on, and so on....

[Airly, he waves a hand.]

D'you see why alcohol is free?

[ Everything gets just a little less attractive the more he talks. The situation on the ship, the rats, him, everything. ]

I do see why the alcohol is free. Yikes. You keep one of those things as a pet?

She's actually growing a bit fond of me now. She only tries to bite off two fingers when I see her, bless her, which would leave me with three fingers. The most useful of the five, I might add.

[He holds up his middle finger, forefinger, and thumb for her admiration.]

Anyway, you ought to meet her sometime. You'd be pleasantly surprised. And you should definitely finish going through that box, 'cos I thought long and hard about its contents.

[ Darcy's eyes narrow just slightly. Usually when a guy makes a comment about the usefulness of his fingers...

Nope. She's not gonna comment. Sirius is just being goofy, and this is not the time for embarrassment or dirty jokes. She smiles and then digs into the box again. ]

I'll bet you did! You seem like a thoughtful sort of guy. Let's see... What else have we got here?

[or is it the time for dirty jokes

Anyways, the box! He leans back in his seat as he watches her dig in it, and the next thing to come up, after the dog biscuits, is an oversized t-shirt with a wolf on it. Very Three Wolf Moon t-shirt, but just the one wolf. Sirius shrugs.]

It gets very cold.

[Darcy laughs, a quick sound. Dare we say it's like a bark? Hah!]

This is great! I'm totally going to wear it. A lot.

[It's not her style at all, but it's a gift, and she hasn't got a whole lot to wear, so it's perfect. Hopefully she can amass more clothing and style a whole outfit around it.]

What else, what else?

Finally, someone that appreciates the shirt. My mate Remus was less than impressed.

[Probably because of wolves. Sirius shrugs off the little pang of missing Remus in the interest of leaning forward to watch the rest of the gift revealing.

The next thing down is four space chocolate bars, which are stamped with the image of three crescent moons and a whole lot of squiggly writing in one corner. After that, there's a black plastic torch (because what other choice do muggles have but torches and electricity, poor things), and a fork and knife wrapped in paper towel. Sirius points those out, helpfully.]

You'll want those. People get their hands on the good ones and never let them go, so you're left with crap cutlery. It's awful.

[This is your life now, Darcy. Grasping tight to one set of cutlery because there just isn't any available. Good thing she's already at the bar.]

This is great, Sirius. I mean it. Thank you so much.

[There's a temptation to get into the chocolate right away, but she resists it. She might need it later, so she should save it. Everything else is carefully packed back up, with the reverence reserved for cherished gifts.]

I'd ask if I can buy you a drink, but my money's no good here. [Ha ha, get it?]

[Magnanimously, he nods.]

'Course. It was nothing, really. I mean, what are friends for, yeah?

[Because accepting a box of gifts means automatic friendship, that's just the way that it works in space. He breaks his solemn composure enough to wink at her, with a bit of a grin.]

And it's the thought of the drink that counts, really. You could fetch me a drink and we could call it even, if you really want. Or you could just owe me. I kind of like you owing me.

[Whatever happened to what are friends for? Don't ask.]

[Friends? She thinks he may be a little bit crazy, but so are many of her friends, so why not? Sirius will fit right in.]

I think I kind'a like the thought of me owing you. It adds a little mystery to the whole thing, doesn't it?

[Or it'll get weird and she'll have to call Thor in with his hammer, but those are bridges to be crossed when they're actually come to.]

Mystery-- yeah, exactly. See, I like the way that you think! Everyone is always so needlessly suspicious of favours-- right, so, you owe me, and we're friends, and we'll leave it at that.

[He solemnly holds out a hand to her, over the now-empty cardboard box.]

[His hand is taken and they shake on it. All settled.]

Friends with mysteries. I like it.

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