ataraxion | first note passed ✉ video;

[ There's the whisper of not-quite silence that indicates the device is recording, followed by the sounds of someone obviously fiddling with it, like Emily's realized what a bad idea showing her face to the network could be, and might just turn the device off and call it a day. It takes a minute, but the video eventually clicks on. ]

So.

[ No going back now... ]

Everyone's got this moniker that their parents gave them, and it stays with you- its, really, the only thing that can't take it on the heel and toe, dig? And- I mean, there's gotta be some thought that goes into giving a person a name, like... your parents know you're coming and they've got all these gowed-up hopes, savvy? That you're gonna be this tomato of a doll, that you're gonna be a right gee, that maybe you'll end up a little bit like both of them- [ A glance off screen, chewing on her bottom lip. ] Or nothing like either of them...

But they've gotta choose this moniker that's going to stay with you for the rest of your life, that stands to define you, and--

[ A hopeless look, like this is the edited and condensed version of a much longer conversation she's had over and over with herself- one she's well past frustrated with. ]

How does someone do that?

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Mine went with wine coolers and the Jesus channel.

...maybe skip that one.

What?

Are you on the square right now?

I think sometimes names come with expectations, and sometimes people just choose them because they think they're pretty. The names we're given don't always stick, though, in my experience.

[ Grumpy face!! ]

What.

That's the rumble, what if the expectations don't match the doll? I know you can change your moniker, or go by a nickname, but you can't forget what was there first.

[ Can you? ]

If someone really doesn't like their name, they can change it.

[Says the guy who never legally changed his name but still goes by his middle name.

But he knows what this is about, he thinks, and that makes him give it some extra thought, because if nothing else, she deserves that. She deserves to have someone listening and taking her seriously and giving what she says consideration.]

I think the name matters less than where it comes from - I mean, I guess - when a parent loves their child, I don't think there's such a thing as a bad name.

I understood none of that meaning.

I've had enough people here tell me I chin strange, so if that's your play, the pokes gone stale.

[ she wants to give him the benefit of the doubt, but... really? all of that, and nothing translated?? emily doesn't want to look like a fool on the network ]

What's on your chin?

[Sob he's trying so hard.]

Then you let go of the expectations. Easier said than done, I guess, but dwelling on the things that could have been won't help the way things are. [ She thinks, for a moment. ] It's good to remember your roots. Maybe you don't forget entirely, but you don't have to let it keep defining you.

There's no such thing as a bad name, but they can not like it enough to wanna change it?

[ He knows exactly what this is about- more directly than even Emily can know, since she only knows him by John Blake, and never calls him anything but Blake.

Blake fits. ( So does John, but he's a bull and the proverbial lines are still drawn very clearly. ) ]

Doesn't that mean you've messed up?

[ she... actually checks, before she realizes he still doesn't understand her. either he's playing her like a pro, or he's actually taking her literally, and he's actually that confused. ]

Okay. Nothing is on my chin. Chin is slang for talking.

Let's start over.

None of that translated for you?

Edited 2013-03-25 00:55 (UTC)

You're speaking of names, right?

You can't predict everything. No one can.

[He actually smiles a little. It's not that he dislikes the name Robin so very much now - it's just that it's complicated. Becoming John had been an important part of his childhood - not getting past the anger, not moving on, but part of dealing with it, definitely.]

It'd just mean that it doesn't work for them at the time they change it. It's nobody's fault.

Yes. [ this would be a mental sigh of relief. ] And how you can't get away from it, if it's not the right one. Y'know?

Oh.

Yes.

I know that well.

That makes sense, but who wants to remember this boiler? [ What the other woman is saying is true, but its also a sad prospect for a child born abord the Tranquility. ]

[ That is... so difficult for her to process. The phenomenon of an absence of guilt when there are very clearly enough parties involved to assign blame; and in this scenario, the one where she's the only one left on a nightmare spaceship with a baby on the way?

Well, she's accustomed to being the one who messes up. ]

I guess... I just don't want her to worry about that. This place is already messed up enough, I don't want to add to it.

You do? [ or, more importantly: ] What's your name?

Jon Snow.

[ the universe doesn't implode and emily kind of... just... waits........ for the bad part? ]

That's it?

My brother and I both have very biblical names. Which has always struck me as a little curious since my parents weren't religious.

I wish I'd asked them.

Honestly, given how many different worlds people come from in this place? I'm sure any name you pick will be weird to someone and completely normal to someone else.

[Which is true enough. Look at all the people with magical powers - the vampires, and crap like that. People from different times and cultures. Blake doesn't think she should be stressing about something like a name. Certainly not now. The last thing she needs is more stress.]

Naming customs are not, in fact, all cut to that pattern: different cultures adhere to different rules. In some, one is not named until a certain age, and given only a childish nickname or a designation. You may, perhaps, consider the practice of baptism, as it is often linked to naming; one may be baptized at birth, or in youth or adulthood, or even after one's death, in some faiths. Religion aside, there are also those who choose their own name, whether for a specific purpose - as with a pen name - or as a means of self-redefinition.

In short, my dear, names may be influential but they do not necessarily define one. It is a matter in which some careful meditation is appropriate on a parent's part, and yours does you credit. But you need not be paralyzed by the choice.

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