ataraxion | [ text ]

Right, chaps. Cambridge here

I'm looking for a small group - a posse, if you will - of intrepid (preferably childless and unmarried) explorer and/or hero types to pop back in to the depths of that terribly interesting lab to retrieve whatever hard drives and assorted interesting bits of shit you saw there on my behalf

Reason being that there seems to be some kind of horribly intriguing and potentially nasty virus sitting around in that hardware and I do believe it warrants a bit of a poke (no jokes please, let's be professional)

Top tip: don't try anything stupid like plugging whatever pretty little bit of cybernetics you might have hardwired in to your brain straight in to it because I have a strong suspicion you'll end up thoroughly fucked

And I'm talking very thoroughly, like three orifices and both hands

You know what - let's play it safe, shall we?

- Don't press too many buttons
- Don't put your comms devices too near the equipment
- Don't even think of walking in to comms or the science department with so much as a bloody USB stick from that lab

In fact, just don't fuck with it at all - just bag it and tag it and bring it back to room 015 of passenger deck 011

Tea and medals for all upon a successful return

PRIVATE: CILLIAN QUINN
I do realise that the concept of an honest day's work is utterly abhorrent to the likes of you and I but if you fancy putting that attractive little brain of yours to work then let me know

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Oh dear, don't make it sound like that. I do have some experience in these things, I'm just being charmingly facetious

Edited 2013-03-10 21:44 (UTC)

I had no doubts. But since you said yourself you aren't going out there, if you don't have anyone else lined up I'd like to elect Commander Spock.

Rather not, I have a strong suspicion that he's a bit of a dick. Besides, I was rather hoping Ms. Tyke would do me the honour

Spock is trained in command, data retrieval and, if necessary, combat. There are few people that would be better for the position.

Tyke has enough to worry about.

Edited 2013-03-10 22:57 (UTC)

Wonderful. Good for him. Three cheers for Spock and all who sail in him

Ms. Tyke says she already had a plan for the situation before I even posted this. I think she is quite capable of handling it, personally

Tyke is discussing clearing the lab. We're discussing information retrieval. Those are two different things.

As the lady said: no point in sending a separate group for retrieval. Multitasking, they call it

You are severely underestimating what's in there.

And Ms. Tyke as well, I presume you mean to imply

[he sees what you did there]

No, what you're implying is that I think Tyke can't do her job.

Which is pretty rude, for the record.

I told you Ms. Tyke wanted to do a two-for-one. You told me that I was underestimating the problem in doing so. How does that opinion fail to extend to Tyke as well

Because it's unnecessary, and that place is crawling with monsters. They're going to have more than enough on their plates just getting rid of those things.

Ms. Tyke believes that the job can be done and I will readily place my request in her capable hands

And besides, if the place is so infested with monsters then why should your fellow fare any better than Ms. Tyke? I daresay she has as much experience in "command, data retrieval and, if necessary, combat"

I'm not talking about anyone being better.

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