video.

[inquisitive]

[ the video starts recording with a small click! and -- there's a rather young looking fellow peering curiously into the camera. adjusting the way it sits on the table slightly before sitting back in his chair. kasukabe seems to have situated himself comfortably enough in his cabin, and he's already dressed in his standard outfit, complete with too-big lab coat. a small pause before he smiles pleasantly into the camera. ]

Hello! I think I've got a decent grasp of the situation thus far, and thought it would be good to introduce myself.

My name is Kasukabe. I operate a clinic back home that diagnoses and operates on victims of magic user attacks. I've heard this place has a medical bay, so if there's a way I could help there, I'd be glad to hear of it. I'm also a dedicated researcher of magic user physiology and culture, though I think that skillset might not be as needed in this place.

[ a polite little nod before he straightens up. and then he adds, tone of voice quite mild, as if he's merely talking about the weather: ]

Also. I had a friend with me, before I ended up here. I haven't seen him yet, but just in case he's also here, I'd just like to say:

If you see a cockroach that's about -- [ pause ] -- nine feet tall, wearing sneakers and probably walking upright, don't be scared! His name is Johnson, and he's tame. Unless you attack him, then you should probably hide somewhere, he's scary when he's angry. But just tell him, 'Kasukabe is here, he's looking for you!' and he'll probably run off to search for me.

[ have a wide, beaming smile. ]

That's all.

Comments

audio

[ghostthatlingers]

Are you telling me that not only is the cockroach nine feet tall, but it's intelligent?

audio

[inquisitive]

That might depend on how you define 'intelligent.' Johnson isn't exactly a neurosurgeon.

audio

[ghostthatlingers]

Intelligent enough to understand what we're saying, at least.

(voice.)

[carbonite]

Only if you tell me if you see a giant furball walking around.

(voice.)

[inquisitive]

A giant furball. Literally?

[ he has seen stranger things okay he needs to make sure. ]

(voice.)

[carbonite]

He's a wookie. Tall alien. Covered in fur.

video;

[tumbleweeds]

[ Blankly: ] Magic user attacks. Magic user physiology and culture.

[ Deeeeep breath, then: ]

For fuck's sake.

video;

[inquisitive]

[ ??? ]

I take it you find that problematic?

video;

[tumbleweeds]

Uh, duh. Considering someone here that liked me just fine before he found out I was a shapeshifter wants to stab me just because I can, yeah, I find that fucking problematic.

Not every magic user is the same and we don't go around attacking people for no reason, and you sure as hell had better not come poking around us with needles or anything. You want to know what my culture is? Human.

Video

[skindeep]

[A nine foot tall cockroach. Wearing sneakers. Wait.]

Is your friend athletic?

Video

[inquisitive]

Atheletic? [ hmmm ] He's very fast and strong, but it's not like he works out. Ah! He did play baseball once, though. He was excellent at stealing bases since everyone ran away from him for some reason, ahaha!

Video

[skindeep]

[Ahaha! he's laughing along with you. But no, he can't really put a giant cockroach on his football team, even an intelligent one.]

[Can he?]

Perhaps he'll find a game here. ...He doesn't cook, does he?

voice; (sorry gadgets)

[prince]

[ well, it's lucky he turned off the feed to reply the moment he started talking about researching magical physiology and culture, because honestly, part of arthur's job in camelot involves hunting down and skewering the giant insects that live in the forest. although a cockroach surely isn't as intimidating as a scorpion. or a spider. right? ]

[ either way, it's irrelevant! because he's focused on one part of this broadcast in particular. ]

I don't know, I think some research into magical physiology could prove useful enough. It sounds as though you have an admirable profession for one so young.

voice;

[inquisitive]

[ oh my god kasukabe would be so upset if anyone skewered johnson (or got skewered by him) so it's a good thing arthur doesn't say anything about it!!!

but hahaha 'young,' he's just going to skip over that for the moment and instead focus on: ]

I don't know about 'admirable,' but there certainly aren't very many of us studying that particular field, where I'm from. Considered too dangerous and risky, not much reward, so on and so forth. Are magic users common here? Or where you're from? I've already heard that people here come from varying different worlds.

NOT HERE

[tumbleweeds]

[ WE WERE FRIENDS KIND OF ONCE ARTHUR PENDRAGON YOU BASTARD ]

voice;

[justamobster]

[ He doesn't know what's worse, the cockroach or the magic user bit. In his experience, "researcher" means not having to ask permission to cut people open.

If he'd ever given thought to getting checked out at the med bay, this would have killed it. ]

Giant cockroach. Right.

voice;

[inquisitive]

[ gosh, everyone makes such rude assumptions!!! ]

That's exactly what he is! I can't be entirely sure why he ended up so huge, but I believe it's because he grew up in the sewers, which can get pretty clogged with residues of magic smoke and magic-infused rain.

audio;

[logicunlocked]

[ ...giant cockroach? ]

Hey, uh, do you inhale a lot of fumes in your line of work? 'Cause if you do you might want to get check out.

audio;

[inquisitive]

... fumes?

[ after a moment of thought, ]

Aah! Ahaha, I'm neither high, nor hallucinating, nor insane, if that's what you're getting at.

[voice]

[doc_pompous]

Did you...say you operated a clinic?

[voice]

[inquisitive]

I did say that.

audio

[mmmgorditas]

[You know the sad thing is, this is not the weirdest thing he's ever heard. That would probably depress him if he thought about it hard.]

I'll keep a lookout. He isn't hostile, right? Or is he just not hostile to you?

video;

[inquisitive]

He's generally pretty calm, although if anyone tries to hurt him first he'll grow aggressive. He doesn't like pesticides, either.

[abrahamic]

So you're Japanese? [ Everyone else asked the interesting questions, he might as well ask the obvious. ]

[inquisitive]

[ maybe not so obvious! ]

I'm not sure what you're asking.