100% encrypted; text to voice function enabled; locked from wardnik

[coffeeking]

HELLO You're probably confused. Take some time to read this over. We do our best to keep it up to date and it should answer most of your questions. GENERAL INFORMATION » WHAT HAPPENED, WHERE YOU ARE, WHAT TO DO IN DEPTH INFORMATION » AS MUCH DETAIL AS WE COULD FIND WARNING » ABOUT THE ENTITY KNOWN AS ☺ FAQ » BECAUSE WE'RE SICK OF ANSWERING THE SAME QUESTIONS HEADCOUNT » CURRENT NUMBER OF PEOPLE ABOARD THE SHIP WITH ACTIVE COMMUNICATORS SPACE TRAINING » IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST TIME ABOARD A SPACE SHIP, PLEASE WATCH THESE HELPFUL VIDEOS COMMUNITY NOTCEBOARD » SO NO ONE DIES OF BOREDOM OR LACKS SOMETHING THEY NEED [ADDITIONAL IC/OOC INFO] [OOC INFO ABOUT THIS PAGE] Please address any additional questions to the network. Don't trust Ward and Resnik. - Indictus & Aethalides cambitas

[LOCKED to Cambitas Members]
Thoughts on our new/old friends and their quest for the nameless captain?

Comments

video

[loyalpup]

[This is the face of one slightly confused new arrival who may or may not have read all of that information.]

Right. So, um, say we had this dog, this really big dog who gets really mean, like grrr mean. Is there somewhere we can put him?

anon permatext

[coffeeking]

Is the dog a real dog, or is the dog you? We have plenty of werewolves on board, so there's no need to beat around the bush and speak in theoretics.

Re: anon permatext

[loyalpup]

Oh, well, right. It's me, but only once a month mind.

[He scratches his head, still a bit confused]

I don't know how space months work though, might not change at all what with no moon around.

[Oh, hey what was that about other werewolves?]

There's more? Like a proper pack and all?

threadjacking this sorry ianto AUGGIE-LOCKED

[altercate]

Tom.
Careful.

you're not sorry at all, get out >|

[coffeeking]

tom doesn't know how to lock things *sob*

[loyalpup]

Hal said it's alright because everyone knows about us here.

text.

[incubo]

[ holy fuck he's not the weirdest thing around anymore it's a goddamn miracle

of course, there's only 279(ish) people on board. that's maybe a few months of regular feedings if he went through everyone. not great. ]

so is there like an average number of people that show up / leave every jump or is it just some random number every time?

maybe i missed it idk that was a lot to read

anon permatext

[coffeeking]

As far as we can tell, it's random. There's no pattern or average number, though we have gone from somewhere around 50 to the current number in the course of just over a year, so we're growing in number overall, disregarding the jump-to-jump fluctuations.

text;

[suddenlycaptain]

Something in the FAQ on why you can't just steal a shuttle and try to fly home would be great.

anon permatext

[coffeeking]

Consider it done. You'd think the word "shuttle" would tip them off that it's not meant for long distance travel.

[suddenlycaptain]

People get stupid when they're desperate.

But thank you.

voice;

[endeavors]

['why are there wolves everywhere'

wait what]

There are are wolves here?

anon permatext

[coffeeking]

Yes, there are wolves here. Some are direwolves, so they're quite a bit larger than average.

Others are actually people, so please don't shoot them.

[endeavors]

Oh, no, no - I don't - [He can't say he doesn't hunt, because he does, but not that.] I'm not planning on shooting anyone. Or anything. It's just that - uh.

[uhh.]

Do you... know the names of these people?

[northerner]

How flattering, to see we still garner a mention after all this time.

[ SERIOUSLY ARE PEOPLE STILL UP IN ARMS ABOUT THE DIREWOLVES. ]

[coffeeking]

You realize that the fourth question we got this round was, "There are wolves here?" It's a legitimate concern when one runs across a massive wolf on their way to the bathroom. It comforts people to know that they're technically pets of a sort.

[northerner]

Should my brothers and I address the network upon the matter? Perhaps that would reassure people, to hear us speak of them.

text;

[fraud]

Hey, person who makes this thing, I want to contribute something to it.

[ WHATEVER LOCKED THREADS ARE FROM LAME-O'S ]

anon permatext

[coffeeking]

Depends on what it is.

text;

[fraud]

People need to stop breaking the fourth wall. Or at least, not be an idiot in front of pop culture icons.

that one encryption

[starked]

Only one she in command.

sure is a big one

[firstofficer]

I am inclined to second Mister Stark's assessment.

it's the biggest one i ever did see

[starked]

And we know when he agrees with me, I'm not just being a parody of my fake name.

Can't say I'd blame them for looking for her.

text|

[entrapments]

typo in community noticeboard :)

anon permatext

[coffeeking]

...Thanks. Wonder how long that's been there.