[Video] Imperialism begins in the home kids, remember this

[tenthousandyears]

[The video turns on to a small Japanese woman in formal military dress. Very formal. Are those epaulettes? Who even wears those anymore? Well regardless of her fashion sense, she will give the screen a small, very shallow bow of her head. There is a very serious air of business here. If you are expecting a forthcoming announcement of a death the mood would not be indicative of you being wrong.]

Good day! It is a pleasure to meet all of you, surely. You may call me the Empire of Greater Japan. I feel it should be announced that as of today the forward kitchen of deck 251 is now its own autonomous state under the protection of the Japanese empire.

Food will of course still be served, your basic rights will be observed. But in return I ask you observe the rules clearly posted on the far wall of the kitchen. As well as the simple stocking directions located on the inside of each cabinet door to maximize cabinet space and present a system of order. If these can't be maintained I am... afraid you will not be allowed within the territory of Dai-koku.

Other basic rules include no destruction of property, theft, murder or public indecency. Thank you!

Russia-san, I know you're on this vessel. Please know any aggressions against these borders will be taken as a declaration of war! ...So. Um. Please maintain your manners! ...Your better manners.

[There is a pause where she looks rather uncertain.]

Ah... And if there are any who would wish a meal who would rather not cook themselves or cannot. ...Whatever your dietary needs. Please inform me and I will see to it you receive the proper nutrition in an... appetizing fashion.

Thank you for your time!

[Another bow, this one more flustered than her opening one and the communication ends.]

Comments

[video]

[lookingsharp]

Oh, uh! Gee.

[He practically just harassed her and now she's being nice. Gosh he feels bad. He scratches the back of his head.]

I'm really sorry about earlier. It's just that... We're all on this ship together so everyone should all work together. We have to share. That way everyone can make it home alright.

[video]

[tenthousandyears]

[No Sora! Don't be fooled! ...She will completely stab you in the back later if it totally suits her purposes sob.

But oh. Surely... such a lecture doesn't apply to her she always has others best in mind! cough if her best interests equal others But hm...]

It's forgivable of course. Though... Say perhaps we know one. ...Or two. Persons who don't feel this way. Surely we must do something about them before they infect the rest of the citizens...

[video]

[lookingsharp]

[In before Sora becomes her oblivious knight.]

Who are they?

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[tenthousandyears]

There is one I've been fighting alone these past few years... Her name is Russia-san and she is... not as she first appears!! I would never casually speak ill of others, surely. But she has been known as the... [ahem] origin of all suffering before.

The other... I don't truly understand. But he goes around claiming to be me and believes because of this he can dictate my every action. I don't know how many others he plays this... game of his with. But surely to the point of stalking is far too malicious!

[video; lock]

[lookingsharp]

Okay, look out Russia and... Does this guy call himself Sakura Honda too?

[video; lock]

[tenthousandyears]

He prefers Kiku Honda, though he also introduces himself as Japan. He claims because of this I can't do anything he doesn't approve.

[THE FIEND...]

Meanwhile his... numerous... l-l-lovers... won't cease contacting me!

[video; lock]

[lookingsharp]

You can have more than one...?

Uh, I mean, that's not cool! Why won't they leave you alone?

[video; lock]

[tenthousandyears]

I-it's very indecent I know, he is surely a person of strange tastes...

I asked him to assume a position of indifference and he... said because we share the same name... he cannot! I cannot simply give up being Japan simply so it pleases him...!

[video; lock]

[lookingsharp]

Well, if anyone starts bugging you from now on, you can tell me. I'll get them to leave you alone!

[video; lock]

[tenthousandyears]

You would... do such a thing... ... ...for me?

[She is truly touched over here. Seriously. Everyone else is like GET OUT JAPAN YOU'RE CRAZY, but h-he... it's so beautiful ;;]

[video; lock]

[lookingsharp]

Yeah! If you need help then I'll help you.

[video; lock]

[tenthousandyears]

...Surely I will ask if I do then. Thank you Sora-sama.