ataraxion | 001 First kill; video

Say 'hello', Lamby. [ Yes, this is a grown man in your video feed with a tiny flannel sheep. Dexter holds it up to the camera, looking at it wistfully as he does. He would. It'd his son's favourite. ] Baaa.

[ And that's quite enough of that. The man's eyes lift up, and then he retreats enough that Dexter is entirely visible on the sceen from the chest up, wearing a frankly garish printed shirt and a bright smile. The smile is fake. All of this is fake. A normal person responding to a normal situation, not Dexter with what Dexter knows about this place. Dexter who's stuck between wanting to go home to his son and... Other Things. Dexter Divided. ]

I mean I know this is Florida and anything can happen, but aren't space theme park rides a little passe? Don't get me wrong, I think Space Mountain is as cool as the next person, but that's a roller coaster. I've had to walk everywhere since I got here. Everything's broken, the food is lousy, sleeping arrangements are cramped - and I live in Miami; I know cramped!

[ And while we're on the topic of theme parks... ]

I urge you to reconsider opening this theme park, Mr. Hammond. It's just not safe. Wait-- [ He cocks his head to one side, as though listening. ] What's that sound? [ The table jumps, jumps, as though something heavy is making it rattle. Suddenly his own hand leaps out at him, a tiny, homicidal flannel sheep taking him by the throat and knocking him out of his chair as he gives a very fake yell. ] Argh!

[ Oh no, he's back. Too much time playing with small children, he can't help himself. ]

Just kidding. But seriously, I'd like to go home now, please. I know, I know, everyone must say that, right?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Its clothing is quite an attractive color.

[ Pause. ]

Where is Florida? Is it for "lovers", as Nebraska is according to the other man's clothing?

Edited 2012-11-10 16:40 (UTC)

[ Nebraska is for lovers? Dexter pauses visibly, because it must be talking about Brian...

...but there is a lot for him to really digest in this other than Brian and T-shirts and how he could have that when he's never been to Nebraska, not really, and...

And the thing in the video is absolutely not human.

Where does he even start?

By opening his mouth and making clumsy, inarticulate vowel sounds for a few moments, obviously. ]

It's uh... Um. I mean...

[ Congratulations, Dexter. That one's going to be difficult to outdo. ]

Depends on which T-shirt manufacturer you ask.

[ Really? Beating out your own record a moment after you've made it; I'm impressed. ]

[ She is most definitely talking about Brian -- not that she knows Brian's name is Brian, but that's not the point. Shale hardly pays attention to names anyway. ]

Is Nebraska not a brothel, then?

[ Rocking her worldview tbh. ]

And why are they called "t-shirts"?

[ Is Nebraska a brothel? He hopes he gets to remember that one, it might be worth the three day roundtrip just to get punched in the face for suggesting it. ]

Nebraska is a state. And come to think of it I'm not sure brothels are for lovers either.

[ He knows the answer to the last one though, and puts his hands together into a T. ]

T-shirts are t-shaped. See? You uh... I hope you don't mind me asking, but I've never seen a skin condition like that before. What is it?

A state. [ She sounds... vaguely confused. ]

Lovers do roll about and exchange fluids, do they not? That seems like a brothel to me.

[ Oh. Well that makes sense, as for the shirt -- but she has to laugh, and it's not a very nice sound. ]

It is not skin, for I am no flesh creature. It is stone, as I am a golem.

I... No. Lovers roll around and exchange fluids because they're in love. But that's not all they do. There's usually a whole bunch of other things as well. Romance. You can't buy it.

[ He is not the best elementary school teacher for this stuff, how did this even happen.

Oh wait. What? Suddenly all thoughts of trying to define love hit a staggered stop in his brain. ]

Is that a costume culture thing? Renaissance Faire?

Romance. I have seen such things. It seems to make flesh creatures rather... odd.

[ Not like Shale can talk, Ms. Sten-Your-Glistening-Abs-Ooh. ]

I could hardly fit in most costumes.

Ah, yeah. Well at least you admit to that. Must be hard to find something appropriate, but at least you're honest about your shape, right?

[ Dexter please stop. ]

[ PAUSE. ]

Did it just imply that I am too wide?

[ Yes. ]

Not at all. I--

[ Oh look he dropped his device. There's a crack as it hits the floor, then Dexter's face reappears, tilting it, shaking it. ]

Hello? Hello?

[ Disconnected. ]

001 First kill; video

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