ataraxion | 007 Text; miniature psa

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007 Text; miniature psa

I'm sure you're all sick of hearing me talk, which is fortunate for you because right now I literally can't. Either way I thought it appropriate to admit that at least some part of what you've heard is true. A truth that I felt I was protecting you from.

There was a man on board - a murderer - who could have hurt a whole lot of people. The fact that he didn't is strictly down to the fact that I didn't make him into a hunted man the moment I saw his face. Some of you probably even knew him. His name was Sylar, and at one point during his stay here I'm told he saved my brother's life. It never forgave him, in my mind, for what he did at home.

The other implication made against me is also true.

I urge all of you to try not to let this gossip-mongering divide you. We are stronger together, and all of us have our burdens, our secrets--and in general, good reasons to keep both to ourselves. When you think about condemning others for something they've done, try to consider what you yourself are hiding. Are you altogether free from guilt, ideally poised to be placing blame on other people? Few of us are.

- Nathan Petrelli

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Collapsed, threw up a bit, passed out. It was an adventure.

Oh God. Where are you now? Please tell me you went to the med bay.

Yeah, I did. You know, I'd feel happier if you got checked up too. This might be something psychosomatic, it being my nightmare, but you were there too. You ought to make sure you're okay.

Good.

I went to the medbay for some sleeping pills a day or so after it was over. Aside from the usual sickness post jump, I feel fine.

Maybe I should but I'm more concerned about you.

Come down and see me at least. Just seeing you would make me feel better.

I'm already making my way there now. If I can help, then I'll be glad to.

You're sweet. I appreciate it. I warn you, I don't look like much.

Neither do I. But I don't care. It's your health I'm more concerned about.

Thanks again. I guess I'll see you down here soon.

You will. I'm almost there.

[Sure enough, Bela is at the medbay. She hasn't brought anything with her because she literally ran out of her room. Bela asks the nearest person to where he is and she finds him quickly, standing beside the bed he was in. She looks him over, her expression falling when she realises just how bad it is.]

I'm here.

[ Nathan is propped up on pillows, using both hands to text people on the network still when Bela arrives. There's oxygen available to him, cream lathered on the burns across his exposed chest and down one side of his neck from his ear to his collarbone. Bandages on the backs of his hands cover more burns, and it's difficult to tell, but his hair is already thinning, or at least that's what Nathan thinks when he touches it.

He looks pale, a little bit hollowed out, eyes unusually chiseled into his face. The determination is still there. His voice is a croak. ]

Hey.

[ And then he crooks a finger toward her. ]

[At least he was awake. That was better than him being in a coma. She can only imagine what the burns looked like underneath the cream and the pain he was in, even if he was on medication. Bela glances at his hands, seeing the bandages before her gaze settles on his face, noting how pale and sickly he looked.

She smiles, albeit a little sadly.]

Hi.

[She takes a few steps closer when he gestures her over, now standing right next to the bed. Bela doesn't know what to say but she's definitely worried.]

[ Nathan hates not being able to talk. He likes talking, and it's frankly killing him to keep his mouth shut. Either way he reaches over to touch the chair beside the bed, indicating it to her wordlessly, and then picks up his communicator, typing out several words and offering it over to her. ]

You look like someone just killed your puppy. I'm not dead yet.

Edited 2012-10-11 01:50 (UTC)

[At his gesture, she sits down in the chair and turns to look at him, her expression a lot less gloomy than before. Bela glances down at the device and reads the message, smiling faintly.]

And you won't be. They'll make you better, this place is advanced.

[She's trying to convince herself.]

You just worried me.

I got plenty of options. Worst case scenario I can get myself turned into a vampire, so I suppose that's a turn up for the books. I'm sorry. Trying to laugh about it makes it easier.

[ His hand falls to her knee, giving it a gentle squeeze. ]

You can barely talk, let alone laugh, Nathan.

[She glances down at the hand on her knee for a moment before covering it with her own.]

I suppose I'd do whatever I could to survive. Even if it involved a vampire.

[Bela looks uncomfortable for a moment, then it passes.]

You'll get through this.

[ It's a little more difficult to type with one hand, but he's loath to draw his own away. ]

One way or another I will. I don't even believe in vampires.

[ His smile is apologetic as he hands the device back, the last line written on it. ]

When I proposed another date, I wasn't thinking of the sick bay at the time. Maybe you should plan the next one.

[Vampires are real, she wants to say, knowing that they were on board the ship. Maybe Nathan knew but he wasn't letting on. Her thumb brushes gently over the back of his hand in a comforting gesture, the other part of the message making Bela smile faintly.]

Here wouldn't be my first choice either. I'll think of something, I promise. For when you get better.

[ He knows they're real, he just doesn't like believing it. It feels like a betrayal, just the same way admitting he can fly does. Forget reality, this craziness is real life. But it's how things are here. Just like there are people from Star Trek walking around, and Nathan actually respects a handful of them. He can do that while still thinking they're fictional, right?

There's a delay before his next comment, because he coughs, upsets his ravaged throat, and ends up trying to swallow down poisonous bile while his eyes water. Not so pretty. ]

Still not sure this is what you signed up for.

[There's also superheroes which are definitely fictional where Bela comes from. She used to the idea of vampires existing. It was one of the many strange aspects about being on board this ship and Bela had come to accept it, even if she didn't exactly like it. She could at least acknowledge it.

A frown crosses her face when he coughs and Bela thinks about getting a doctor for him when Nathan stops and she waits for him to type again.]

I'm not even sure either. But I am here now regardless of anything else, okay?

[ Okay, so he'll give her that. But it's precisely the reason why he was in denial for so long about his own powers. They weren't right, and not believing in it almost made him pretend they'd just go away. Running his campaign had been difficult enough as it was.

It's funny how he thinks about that now. It seems like so long ago, but the nightmare had brought it all so clearly to the surface. Things he'd forgotten he knew. ]

Okay. I'll make it worth your while if you tell me a story? I'd open up myself, but it might take longer than we've got.

Something about myself then.

[There's a slight hesitation from Bela because she has a feeling that he wants a true story about her and not something she made up. Telling a sob story didn't seem to fit the mood and telling him what she did for a living wasn't a good idea either-at least in her opinion.]

When I first arrived on board the ship and addressed the network, I asked for a hair dryer and a decent drink. I also said that whomever brought me here had to pay for the removal of the tattoo. [Bela laughs.] Kirk came through on the alcohol for me so it wasn't a complete loss.

I suppose I thought that my brusque exterior would make people listen and for a while it did. Somehow, I had to be accommodating in order to get by on the ship. I'm not a nice person and I shouldn't pretend to be.

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