01 test [Audio]

[cave_johnson]

[thump thump]

...This thing on?

[There another set of unpleasant thump thumps on the comm device as Cave rasps his bony finger across it, like tapping a microphone. It is boggling that Cave has gone on this long using it just for commenting or replying to other people with--they were truly little marvels; lots of buttons, fun to play with. It takes a couple more seconds of fumbling before he realizes it is indeed, on. Just the audio, but that's all he needs.]

Cave Johnson here. If you've recently experienced disorientation, nudity, nausea, temporary memory loss or mild to severe cannibalism due to crippling hunger, that's normal. Or so I assume. This jumping business has only happened twice so far.

But if you can collect yourselves enough to turn on this device and understand the words comin' out of my mouth: congratulations, you're one step ahead of the game! If not and you're hearing my voice telepathically, lack opposable thumbs, or if you are currently standing within earshot of me--welcome to space. That's right; space. Final frontier, you are in it.

By the way, if you're receptive of my unrealized telepathy, please let me know.

Now, you may have noticed you've got a set of numbers on your arm. That's normal too, and if any of them are accompanied by the letters S-C-I, that clearly stands for science, which you are now an honorary part of. Life, destiny, and fate has been transcribed into your very flesh and blood. No use fighting it!

Real question is, what are you going to do about it? Why not fill out a couple of forms and see what I can do for you. And what you can do for science.

Cave Johnson, we're done here.

[Said form is kind of long, even condensed as it is from the original; Fill it out in whole, part, don't do it at all. Totally optional and for funsies. ALSO, this post was probably backdated a smidge.]

<code> Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE) <b>1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called?</b> <b>2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.</b> 1] dizziness 2] shortness of breath 3] problems waking up in the morning 4] problems staying up 48 hours straight 5] have not previously performed an enrichment center program <b>3) What is your favorite color?</b> 01] Peach-orange 02] Powder blue 03] Cyan 04] Chartreuse 05] Jade 06] Dark coral 07] Navy blue 08] Pale mauve 09] Linen 10] Dark goldenrod 11] Pumpkin 12] Dark cerulean 13] Zinnwaldite 14] Rust 15] Lavender Blush 16] Green 17] Lilac 18] Blue 19] Midnight Blue 20] Tan 21] Carmine 22] Amber 23] Indigo 24] Pale red-violet 25] Lemon Cream 26] Pale chestnut 27] Bondi Blue 28] Gamboge 29] Gold 30] Steel blue 31] Tangerine 32] Lime 33] Seashell 34] Pale pink 35] Dark turquoise 36] Pale cornflower blue 37] Denim 38] Emerald 39] Burnt Sienna 40] Buff 41] Brown 42] Pear 43] Orangatang Red 44] Chestnut 45] Cerulean 46] Dark Tea Green 47] Dark salmon 48] Sandy brown 49] Dark tan 50] Pine Green 51] Flax 52] Ochre 53] Bronze 54] Klein Blue 55] Pale Sandy Brown 56] Teal 57] Azure 58] Dark Terra cotta 59] International orange 60] Red 61] Orange 62] Safety Orange 63] Coral 64] Scarlet 65] Light brown 66] Olive Drab 67] Magenta 68] Bistre 69] Cerulean blue 70] Dodger blue 71] Cobalt 72] Violet-eggplant 73] Amethyst 74] Sapphire 75] Ultramarine 76] Fuchsia 77] Heliotrope 78] Cinnamon 79] Chocolate 80] Goldenrod 81] Sea Green 82] Pastel pink 83] Persian blue 84] Mountbatten pink 85] Pale carmine 86] Bright green 87] Turquoise 88] Gray 89] Gray-Tea Green 90] Dark blue 91] Cerise 92] Pale brown 93] Green-yellow 94] Raw umber 95] Lavender <b>4) How do others describe your education?</b> 01] Nursery School 02] Grade School 03] Junior High 04] High School 05] Some College 06] Associates Degree 07] Bachelors 08] Graduate Degree 09] PhD / Post Doctoral 10] None <b>5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?</b> 1] 1 Day 2] 2-5 Days 3] 7-14 Days 4] 14-30 Days 5] 30-90 Days 6] 90 Days - 6 Months 7] 1 Year 8] Greater Than 1 Year <b>6) Your favorite color is:</b> 01] Camouflage green 02] Sangria 03] Salmon 04] Pale magenta 05] Swamp green 06] Pastel green 07] Carrot 08] Burgundy 09] Mint Green 10] Wheat 11] Aqua 12] Thistle 13] Vermilion 14] School bus yellow 15] Khaki 16] Cornflower blue 17] Dark light blue 18] Dark slate gray 19] Mustard 20] Hot pink 21] Dark pastel green 22] Dark brown 23] Papaya whip 24] Dark spring green 25] Cooked umber 26] Dark chestnut 27] Dark Khaki 28] Russet 29] Burnt umber 30] Wisteria 31] Beige 32] Selective yellow 33] Viridian 34] Old Gold 35] Mauve 36] Dark violet 37] Dark pink 38] Aquamarine 39] Slate gray 40] Royal Blue 41] Terra cotta 42] Blaze Orange 43] Dark Indigo 44] Violet 45] Dark tangerine 46] Saffron 47] Olive 48] Tenné 49] Peach 50] Maroon 51] Silver 52] Robin egg blue 53] Pink 54] Asparagus 55] Purple 56] Pale Blue 57] Dark green 58] Yankee Yellow 59] Navajo white 60] Fern green 61] Bright violet 62] Corn 63] Eggplant 64] Bright turquoise 65] Gray-asparagus 66] Moss green 67] Taupe 68] Dark Olive 69] Red-violet 70] Burnt Orange 71] Orchid 72] Peach-yellow 73] Spring Green 74] Lemon 75] Puce 76] Periwinkle 77] Celadon 78] Dark Scarlet 79] Yellow 80] Black 81] Alizarin Crimson 82] Prussian blue 83] Malachite 84] Dark Peach 85] White 86] Brass 87] Cardinal 88] Alice Blue 89] Cream 90] Tea Green 91] Sepia 92] Crimson 93] Copper 94] Pink-orange <b>7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:</b> 1] Sorry 2] Not Sorry <b>8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>9) What is your favorite meal?</b> 1] Lunch 2] Dinner <b>10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:</b> 01] Childish 02] Oafish 03] Stolid 04] Timid 05] Reserved 06] Conceited 07] Scornful 08] Boastful 09] Sleepy 10] Stable <b>11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?</b> 01] Going Next Door 02] Pain 03] Nobody Loves You 04] The All-Seeing Eye 05] The Barbering Curriculum 06] The Informer 07] News from Home 08] The Witness 09] Joint Suspects 10] The Big Bang 11] Pearls Before Swine 12] Chicken Button 13] Death Eats a Sandwich 14] Hammerhead 15] Hammerhand 16] Fried Hole 17] Hangri-La 18] Ivan Is a Dope 19] Joint Interrogators 20] Law of Partial Pressure 21] The Spinoza 22] Gospel Shark 23] Cloud Cuckoo Land 24] The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing 25] Good Cop / Ventriloquist Cop 26] Alice in Wonderland 27] Monster Polygraph 28] Confession is Good for the Soul 29] Silver Tongued Devil 30] Deep Sea Diver 31] Pay The Piper 32] Federal Bikini Inspector 33] Big Wig 34] Carlsbad Caverns 35] The Boy Who Cried 36] Goonland 37] Role-Role Theory 38] Zipf's Law 39] Stream of Unconsciousness 40] Flash in the Pan 41] The Little Bird 42] Welcome to Bethany 43] Ampere's Rule 44] The Dental Assistant <b>12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.</b> 1] Strongly Disagree 2] Disagree 3] Agree 4] Strongly Agree 5] N/A <b>14) You are a liar:</b> 1] Can't Honestly Disagree 2] Agree 3] Strongly Agree <b>15) Please acknowledge before continuing: I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.</b> 1] I have read all or most of the above. <b>16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>17) Do you trust yourself?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:</b> 01] 1- Slight Pain 02] 2 03] 3 04] 4 05] 5 - Regular Pain 06] 6 07] 7 08] 8 09] 9 10] 10 - Worst Pain Imaginable <b>22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you: I am often:</b> 01] worried that life is vague and unreal 02] suspicious of the actions of others 03] prejudiced in favor of my own department, lab, product, skin color, etc. 04] convinced that nobody really cares about me 05] disturbed by the noise of the wind 06] enraged by the petty foibles of those around me 07] irritated by my past failures and children 08] too depressed to kill an animal or colleague in order to put it out of its pain 09] convinced of the correctness of my opinions on subjects about which I am not an expert 10] speaking very slowly for no apparent reason <b>23) Complete this sentence,</b> <b>24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?</b> 1] Yes 2] No <b>25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.</b> 1] The test caused excruciating pain. 2] The participant felt excruciating pain. 3] I like to eat cake while excruciating. <b>26) Pick your favorite type of cake.</b> 01] Angel food cake 02] Apple cake 03] Babka 04] Battenburg cake 05] Baumkuchen 06] Birthday cake 07] Black Forest cake 08] Buccellato 09] Bundt cake 10] Butter cake 11] Butterfly cake 12] Carrot cake 13] Cheesecake 14] Chocolate cake 15] Christmas cake 16] Chiffon cake 17] Croquembouche 18] Cupcake 19] Date and walnut loaf 20] Devil's food cake 21] Eccles cake 22] Fairy cake 23] Fifteens 24] Fruit cake 25] Sponge cake 26] Génoise Cake 27] Gingerbread 28] Gob 29] Gooey butter cake 30] Honey cake 31] Hot milk cake 32] Hummingbird cake 33] Ice cream cake 34] Jaffa Cakes 35] Suncake 36] Mooncake 37] Orehnjac(a 38] Pancake 39] Panettone 40] Petit fours 41] Pineapple Upside Down Cake 42] Pound cake 43] Queen Elizabeth cake 44] Red bean cake 45] Red velvet cake 46] Rhubarb cake 47] Sachertorte 48] St. Honore Cake 49] Simnel cake 50] Spice cake 51] German chocolate cake 52] Stack cake 53] Leavened cake, Hefekuchen 54] Tarte Tatin 55] Teacake 56] Tres leches cake 57] Vanilla slice 58] Vanilla Crazy Cake 59] Victoria Sponge 60] Wedding cake <b>27) Gender</b> <b>28) Your arm number:</b> <b>39) What is your height and weight?</b> 1] Short and unhealthy 2] Short and stout 3] Average and ugly 4] Tall and ungainly 5] Tall and fat 6] Tall and short <b>30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.</b> 1] Yes 2] No Congratulations! You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE). </code>

Comments

[ 1/3 ]

[suckersluck]

[ 2/3 ]

[suckersluck]

[ 3/3; text]

[suckersluck]

cave johnson of aperture science?

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

That's right. You another person who thinks they were formerly a robot or actually was formerly a robot?

[Text]

[myninjainfocard]

Looks like I have one, lovely.


Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS
Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE)

1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called? ... I'd rather my name, Kabuto, thank you very much.

2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.
(1]) dizziness
2] shortness of breath
3] problems waking up in the morning
4] problems staying up 48 hours straight
(5]) have not previously performed an enrichment center program

3) What is your favorite color?
01] Peach-orange
02] Powder blue
03] Cyan
04] Chartreuse
05] Jade
06] Dark coral
07] Navy blue
08] Pale mauve
09] Linen
10] Dark goldenrod
11] Pumpkin
12] Dark cerulean
13] Zinnwaldite
14] Rust
15] Lavender Blush
16] Green
17] Lilac
18] Blue
19] Midnight Blue
20] Tan
21] Carmine
22] Amber
23] Indigo
24] Pale red-violet
25] Lemon Cream
26] Pale chestnut
27] Bondi Blue
28] Gamboge
29] Gold
30] Steel blue
31] Tangerine
32] Lime
33] Seashell
34] Pale pink
35] Dark turquoise
36] Pale cornflower blue
37] Denim
38] Emerald
39] Burnt Sienna
40] Buff
41] Brown
42] Pear
43] Orangatang Red
44] Chestnut
45] Cerulean
46] Dark Tea Green
47] Dark salmon
48] Sandy brown
49] Dark tan
50] Pine Green
51] Flax
52] Ochre
53] Bronze
54] Klein Blue
55] Pale Sandy Brown
56] Teal
57] Azure
58] Dark Terra cotta
59] International orange
60] Red
61] Orange
62] Safety Orange
63] Coral
64] Scarlet
65] Light brown
66] Olive Drab
67] Magenta
68] Bistre
69] Cerulean blue
70] Dodger blue
71] Cobalt
(72]) Violet-eggplant
73] Amethyst
74] Sapphire
75] Ultramarine
76] Fuchsia
77] Heliotrope
78] Cinnamon
79] Chocolate
80] Goldenrod
81] Sea Green
82] Pastel pink
83] Persian blue
84] Mountbatten pink
85] Pale carmine
86] Bright green
87] Turquoise
88] Gray
89] Gray-Tea Green
90] Dark blue
91] Cerise
92] Pale brown
93] Green-yellow
94] Raw umber
95] Lavender

4) How do others describe your education?
01] Nursery School
02] Grade School
03] Junior High
04] High School
05] Some College
06] Associates Degree
07] Bachelors
08] Graduate Degree
09] PhD / Post Doctoral
(10]) None - ... None of these even exist where I'm from.

5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?
1] 1 Day
2] 2-5 Days
(3]) 7-14 Days
4] 14-30 Days
5] 30-90 Days
6] 90 Days - 6 Months
7] 1 Year
8] Greater Than 1 Year

6) Your favorite color is:
01] Camouflage green
02] Sangria
03] Salmon
04] Pale magenta
05] Swamp green
06] Pastel green
07] Carrot
08] Burgundy
09] Mint Green
10] Wheat
11] Aqua
12] Thistle
13] Vermilion
14] School bus yellow
15] Khaki
16] Cornflower blue
17] Dark light blue
18] Dark slate gray
19] Mustard
20] Hot pink
21] Dark pastel green
22] Dark brown
23] Papaya whip
24] Dark spring green
25] Cooked umber
26] Dark chestnut
27] Dark Khaki
28] Russet
29] Burnt umber
30] Wisteria
31] Beige
32] Selective yellow
33] Viridian
34] Old Gold
35] Mauve
36] Dark violet
37] Dark pink
38] Aquamarine
39] Slate gray
40] Royal Blue
41] Terra cotta
42] Blaze Orange
43] Dark Indigo
44] Violet
45] Dark tangerine
46] Saffron
47] Olive
48] Tenné
49] Peach
50] Maroon
51] Silver
52] Robin egg blue
53] Pink
54] Asparagus
55] Purple
56] Pale Blue
57] Dark green
58] Yankee Yellow
59] Navajo white
60] Fern green
61] Bright violet
62] Corn
(63]) Eggplant - I JUST ANSWERED THIS.
64] Bright turquoise
65] Gray-asparagus
66] Moss green
67] Taupe
68] Dark Olive
69] Red-violet
70] Burnt Orange
71] Orchid
72] Peach-yellow
73] Spring Green
74] Lemon
75] Puce
76] Periwinkle
77] Celadon
78] Dark Scarlet
79] Yellow
80] Black
81] Alizarin Crimson
82] Prussian blue
83] Malachite
84] Dark Peach
85] White
86] Brass
87] Cardinal
88] Alice Blue
89] Cream
90] Tea Green
91] Sepia
92] Crimson
93] Copper
94] Pink-orange

7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:
1] Sorry
(2]) Not Sorry

8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?
(1]) Yes
2] No

9) What is your favorite meal?
(1]) Lunch
2] Dinner

10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:
01] Childish
02] Oafish
03] Stolid
04] Timid
05] Reserved
06] Conceited
07] Scornful
08] Boastful
09] Sleepy
(10]) Stable

11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?
01] Going Next Door
02] Pain
03] Nobody Loves You
04] The All-Seeing Eye
05] The Barbering Curriculum
06] The Informer
07] News from Home
08] The Witness
09] Joint Suspects
10] The Big Bang
11] Pearls Before Swine
12] Chicken Button
13] Death Eats a Sandwich
14] Hammerhead
15] Hammerhand
16] Fried Hole
17] Hangri-La
18] Ivan Is a Dope
19] Joint Interrogators
20] Law of Partial Pressure
21] The Spinoza
22] Gospel Shark
23] Cloud Cuckoo Land
24] The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing
25] Good Cop / Ventriloquist Cop
26] Alice in Wonderland
27] Monster Polygraph
28] Confession is Good for the Soul
29] Silver Tongued Devil
30] Deep Sea Diver
31] Pay The Piper
32] Federal Bikini Inspector
33] Big Wig
34] Carlsbad Caverns
35] The Boy Who Cried
36] Goonland
37] Role-Role Theory
38] Zipf's Law
39] Stream of Unconsciousness
40] Flash in the Pan
41] The Little Bird
42] Welcome to Bethany
43] Ampere's Rule
44] The Dental Assistant

None of these.

12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?
1] Yes
(2]) No

13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.
1] Strongly Disagree
2] Disagree
3] Agree
4] Strongly Agree
(5)] N/A

14) You are a liar:
(1]) Can't Honestly Disagree
2] Agree
3] Strongly Agree

15) Please acknowledge before continuing:
I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.
(1]) I have read all or most of the above.

16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?
1] Yes
(2]) No

17) Do you trust yourself?
(1]) Yes
2] No

18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?
(1]) Yes
2] No

19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?
1] Yes
(2]) No

20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
(1]) Yes
2] No

21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:
01] 1- Slight Pain
02] 2
03] 3
04] 4
05] 5 - Regular Pain
06] 6
07] 7
08] 8
09] 9
(10]) 10 - Worst Pain Imaginable

22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you:
I am often:
01] worried that life is vague and unreal
02] suspicious of the actions of others
03] prejudiced in favor of my own department, lab, product, skin color, etc.
04] convinced that nobody really cares about me
05] disturbed by the noise of the wind
06] enraged by the petty foibles of those around me
07] irritated by my past failures and children
(08]) too depressed to kill an animal or colleague in order to put it out of its pain
09] convinced of the correctness of my opinions on subjects about which I am not an expert
10] speaking very slowly for no apparent reason

23) Complete this sentence, what is the point of this stupidly repetitive form?

24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?
1] Yes
(2]) No

25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.
1] The test caused excruciating pain.
(2]) The participant felt excruciating pain.
3] I like to eat cake while excruciating.

26) Pick your favorite type of cake.
01] Angel food cake
(02]) Apple cake
03] Babka
04] Battenburg cake
05] Baumkuchen
06] Birthday cake
07] Black Forest cake
08] Buccellato
09] Bundt cake
10] Butter cake
11] Butterfly cake
12] Carrot cake
13] Cheesecake
14] Chocolate cake
15] Christmas cake
16] Chiffon cake
17] Croquembouche
18] Cupcake
19] Date and walnut loaf
20] Devil's food cake
21] Eccles cake
22] Fairy cake
23] Fifteens
24] Fruit cake
25] Sponge cake
26] Génoise Cake
27] Gingerbread
28] Gob
29] Gooey butter cake
30] Honey cake
31] Hot milk cake
32] Hummingbird cake
33] Ice cream cake
34] Jaffa Cakes
35] Suncake
36] Mooncake
37] Orehnjac(a
38] Pancake
39] Panettone
40] Petit fours
41] Pineapple Upside Down Cake
42] Pound cake
43] Queen Elizabeth cake
44] Red bean cake
45] Red velvet cake
46] Rhubarb cake
47] Sachertorte
48] St. Honore Cake
49] Simnel cake
50] Spice cake
51] German chocolate cake
52] Stack cake
53] Leavened cake, Hefekuchen
54] Tarte Tatin
55] Teacake
56] Tres leches cake
57] Vanilla slice
58] Vanilla Crazy Cake
59] Victoria Sponge
60] Wedding cake

27) Gender Male

28) Your arm number: 002 >> 180

39) What is your height and weight?
1] Short and unhealthy
2] Short and stout
3] Average and ugly
4] Tall and ungainly
5] Tall and fat
6] Tall and short

Tall and healthy, thank you.

30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.
(1]) Yes
2] No

Congratulations!

You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE).


Ugh.

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

[You sir, are a liar with high pain tolerance.]

Great. I'll have Wheatley process these pronto.

[text; locked]

[megamind]


Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS
Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE)

1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called?

MEGAMIND

2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.


5] have not previously performed an enrichment center program

3) What is your favorite color?

18] Blue



4) How do others describe your education?

09] PhD / Post Doctoral


5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?
1] 1 Day


6) Your favorite color is:

56] Pale Blue


7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:

2] Not Sorry

8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?
1] Yes


9) What is your favorite meal?
1] Lunch


10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:

10] Stable

11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?
01] Going Next Door


12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?
1] Yes


13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.
4] Strongly Agree


14) You are a liar:
1] Can't Honestly Disagree


15) Please acknowledge before continuing:
I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.
1] I have read all or most of the above.

16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?
2] No


17) Do you trust yourself?
1] Yes


18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?
1] Yes


19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?
2] No

20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
1] Yes


21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:

10] 10 - Worst Pain Imaginable

22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you:
I am often:
01] worried that life is vague and unreal
02] suspicious of the actions of others
03] prejudiced in favor of my own department, lab, product, skin color, etc.
04] convinced that nobody really cares about me
06] enraged by the petty foibles of those around me
07] irritated by my past failures and children
09] convinced of the correctness of my opinions on subjects about which I am not an expert

23) Complete this sentence, please.

24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?
2] No

25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.

3] I like to eat cake while excruciating.

26) Pick your favorite type of cake.
41] Pineapple Upside Down Cake


27) Gender Male

28) Your arm number: 001-106

39) What is your height and weight?
3] Average and ugly


30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.
1] Yes

Congratulations!

You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE).


[audio; locked]

[cave_johnson]

[Another liar who has a high pain tolerance and might be a little paranoid. And likes to eat cake while excruciating.]

Well done. I'll have Wheatley process these pronto.

Don't worry, your secret's safe with Cave.

text;

[turnthiscityon]

[... he likes the cut of your glib. or however that saying goes. so much so that he will actually fill out your form]


Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS
Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE)

1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called? Dr. Albert Wily

But just Albert is fine.

2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.
1] dizziness
2] shortness of breath
3] problems waking up in the morning
4] problems staying up 48 hours straight
5] have not previously performed an enrichment center program

3) What is your favorite color?
01] Peach-orange
02] Powder blue
03] Cyan
04] Chartreuse
05] Jade
06] Dark coral
07] Navy blue
08] Pale mauve
09] Linen
10] Dark goldenrod
11] Pumpkin
12] Dark cerulean
13] Zinnwaldite
14] Rust
15] Lavender Blush
16] Green
17] Lilac
18] Blue
19] Midnight Blue
20] Tan
21] Carmine
22] Amber
23] Indigo
24] Pale red-violet
25] Lemon Cream
26] Pale chestnut
27] Bondi Blue
28] Gamboge
29] Gold
30] Steel blue
31] Tangerine
32] Lime
33] Seashell
34] Pale pink
35] Dark turquoise
36] Pale cornflower blue
37] Denim
38] Emerald
39] Burnt Sienna
40] Buff
41] Brown
42] Pear
43] Orangatang Red
44] Chestnut
45] Cerulean
46] Dark Tea Green
47] Dark salmon
48] Sandy brown
49] Dark tan
50] Pine Green
51] Flax
52] Ochre
53] Bronze
54] Klein Blue
55] Pale Sandy Brown
56] Teal
57] Azure
58] Dark Terra cotta
59] International orange
60] Red
61] Orange
62] Safety Orange
63] Coral
64] Scarlet
65] Light brown
66] Olive Drab
67] Magenta
68] Bistre
69] Cerulean blue
70] Dodger blue
71] Cobalt
72] Violet-eggplant
73] Amethyst
74] Sapphire
75] Ultramarine
76] Fuchsia
77] Heliotrope
78] Cinnamon
79] Chocolate
80] Goldenrod
81] Sea Green
82] Pastel pink
83] Persian blue
84] Mountbatten pink
85] Pale carmine
86] Bright green
87] Turquoise
88] Gray
89] Gray-Tea Green
90] Dark blue
91] Cerise
92] Pale brown
93] Green-yellow
94] Raw umber
95] Lavender

This is a trick question. The only valid answers are "Tyrian purple" or "Charcoal"

4) How do others describe your education?
01] Nursery School
02] Grade School
03] Junior High
04] High School
05] Some College
06] Associates Degree
07] Bachelors
08] Graduate Degree
09] PhD / Post Doctoral
10] None

I did note the "doctor" in front of my name

5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?
1] 1 Day
2] 2-5 Days
3] 7-14 Days
4] 14-30 Days
5] 30-90 Days
6] 90 Days - 6 Months
7] 1 Year
8] Greater Than 1 Year

But it was a particularly poor year.

6) Your favorite color is:
01] Camouflage green
02] Sangria
03] Salmon
04] Pale magenta
05] Swamp green
06] Pastel green
07] Carrot
08] Burgundy
09] Mint Green
10] Wheat
11] Aqua
12] Thistle
13] Vermilion
14] School bus yellow
15] Khaki
16] Cornflower blue
17] Dark light blue
18] Dark slate gray
19] Mustard
20] Hot pink
21] Dark pastel green
22] Dark brown
23] Papaya whip
24] Dark spring green
25] Cooked umber
26] Dark chestnut
27] Dark Khaki
28] Russet
29] Burnt umber
30] Wisteria
31] Beige
32] Selective yellow
33] Viridian
34] Old Gold
35] Mauve
36] Dark violet
37] Dark pink
38] Aquamarine
39] Slate gray
40] Royal Blue
41] Terra cotta
42] Blaze Orange
43] Dark Indigo
44] Violet
45] Dark tangerine
46] Saffron
47] Olive
48] Tenné
49] Peach
50] Maroon
51] Silver
52] Robin egg blue
53] Pink
54] Asparagus
55] Purple
56] Pale Blue
57] Dark green
58] Yankee Yellow
59] Navajo white
60] Fern green
61] Bright violet
62] Corn
63] Eggplant
64] Bright turquoise
65] Gray-asparagus
66] Moss green
67] Taupe
68] Dark Olive
69] Red-violet
70] Burnt Orange
71] Orchid
72] Peach-yellow
73] Spring Green
74] Lemon
75] Puce
76] Periwinkle
77] Celadon
78] Dark Scarlet
79] Yellow
80] Black
81] Alizarin Crimson
82] Prussian blue
83] Malachite
84] Dark Peach
85] White
86] Brass
87] Cardinal
88] Alice Blue
89] Cream
90] Tea Green
91] Sepia
92] Crimson
93] Copper
94] Pink-orange

This is a trick question. The only correct answer is "Process black"

(but admittedly I am fond of slate)


7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:
1] Sorry
2] Not Sorry

I find regret rather tedious, don't you?

8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?
1] Yes
2] No

Suspect everyone

9) What is your favorite meal?
1] Lunch
2] Dinner
3] Breakfast


10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:
01] Childish
02] Oafish
03] Stolid
04] Timid
05] Reserved
06] Conceited
07] Scornful
08] Boastful
09] Sleepy
10] Stable
11] Brilliant

11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?
01] Going Next Door
02] Pain
03] Nobody Loves You
04] The All-Seeing Eye
05] The Barbering Curriculum
06] The Informer
07] News from Home
08] The Witness
09] Joint Suspects
10] The Big Bang
11] Pearls Before Swine
12] Chicken Button
13] Death Eats a Sandwich
14] Hammerhead
15] Hammerhand
16] Fried Hole
17] Hangri-La
18] Ivan Is a Dope
19] Joint Interrogators
20] Law of Partial Pressure
21] The Spinoza
22] Gospel Shark
23] Cloud Cuckoo Land
24] The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing
25] Good Cop / Ventriloquist Cop
26] Alice in Wonderland
27] Monster Polygraph
28] Confession is Good for the Soul
29] Silver Tongued Devil
30] Deep Sea Diver
31] Pay The Piper
32] Federal Bikini Inspector
33] Big Wig
34] Carlsbad Caverns
35] The Boy Who Cried
36] Goonland
37] Role-Role Theory
38] Zipf's Law
39] Stream of Unconsciousness
40] Flash in the Pan
41] The Little Bird
42] Welcome to Bethany
43] Ampere's Rule
44] The Dental Assistant

These are all also exceptional names for bands.

12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?
1] Yes
2] No

What kind of uncultured swine do you take me for?

13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.
1] Strongly Disagree
2] Disagree
3] Agree
4] Strongly Agree
5] N/A

14) You are a liar:
1] Can't Honestly Disagree
2] Agree
3] Strongly Agree

15) Please acknowledge before continuing:
I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.
1] I have read all or most of the above.

16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?
1] Yes
2] No

17) Do you trust yourself?
1] Yes
2] No

18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?
1] Yes
2] No

19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?
1] Yes
2] No

20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
1] Yes
2] No

21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:
01] 1- Slight Pain
02] 2
03] 3
04] 4
05] 5 - Regular Pain
06] 6
07] 7
08] 8
09] 9
10] 10 - Worst Pain Imaginable

22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you:
I am often:
01] worried that life is vague and unreal
02] suspicious of the actions of others
03] prejudiced in favor of my own department, lab, product, skin color, etc.
04] convinced that nobody really cares about me
05] disturbed by the noise of the wind
06] enraged by the petty foibles of those around me
07] irritated by my past failures and children
08] too depressed to kill an animal or colleague in order to put it out of its pain
09] convinced of the correctness of my opinions on subjects about which I am not an expert
10] speaking very slowly for no apparent reason

23) Complete this sentence, would you kindly.

24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?
1] Yes
2] No

25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.
1] The test caused excruciating pain.
2] The participant felt excruciating pain.
3] I like to eat cake while excruciating.

26) Pick your favorite type of cake.
01] Angel food cake
02] Apple cake
03] Babka
04] Battenburg cake
05] Baumkuchen
06] Birthday cake
07] Black Forest cake
08] Buccellato
09] Bundt cake
10] Butter cake
11] Butterfly cake
12] Carrot cake
13] Cheesecake
14] Chocolate cake
15] Christmas cake
16] Chiffon cake
17] Croquembouche
18] Cupcake
19] Date and walnut loaf
20] Devil's food cake
21] Eccles cake
22] Fairy cake
23] Fifteens
24] Fruit cake
25] Sponge cake
26] Génoise Cake
27] Gingerbread
28] Gob
29] Gooey butter cake
30] Honey cake
31] Hot milk cake
32] Hummingbird cake
33] Ice cream cake
34] Jaffa Cakes
35] Suncake
36] Mooncake
37] Orehnjac(a
38] Pancake
39] Panettone
40] Petit fours
41] Pineapple Upside Down Cake
42] Pound cake
43] Queen Elizabeth cake
44] Red bean cake
45] Red velvet cake
46] Rhubarb cake
47] Sachertorte
48] St. Honore Cake
49] Simnel cake
50] Spice cake
51] German chocolate cake
52] Stack cake
53] Leavened cake, Hefekuchen
54] Tarte Tatin
55] Teacake
56] Tres leches cake
57] Vanilla slice
58] Vanilla Crazy Cake
59] Victoria Sponge
60] Wedding cake

27) Gender Male

28) Your arm number:

39) What is your height and weight?
1] Short and unhealthy
2] Short and stout
3] Average and ugly
4] Tall and ungainly
5] Tall and fat
6] Tall and short

30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.
1] Yes
2] No

Congratulations!

You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE).


I see you're a man of SCIENCE, sir. I approve.

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

[Oh Cave likes your answers.]

That's right, I'm Cave Johnson. Founder and CEO of Aperture Science.

I like your style. You're a man who knows what he wants, just like me.

[testgasm]

[guess who was probably hovering over your shoulder the entire time watching you make this post

your favorite personal assistant, that's who]

Did you--did you want me to fill one of these out, Sir?

[IF I FILL ONE OUT WILL I BE A ROBOT AGAIN FASTER...]

[cave_johnson]

Sure thing, kid. It'll give you good reading practice for when you process all of them. Nothin' like grueling repetitive work and hard labor to make you learn somethin' fast.

text;

[payload]

[ You're breaking this astrophysicist's brain, Cave. You really really are. ]

What exactly do you intend to do with these?

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

[GOOD. Never got anywhere without breaking a few legs... or brains.]

Science! Can't have test subjects, employees or other science affectionados without knowing where to place 'em. This space ship still has a whole mess of problems, doesn't it? Why not start working on them?

[Audio]

[cutthelines]

Much of this documentation seems irrelevant.

[And the ones that don't are just plain unsubtle.]

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

Irrelevant how? Irrelevant as in you can't read it or you don't like science and the progress of humanity as a whole?

[video]

[the_vishual]

Are all of these questions nessecary? They read like a psychological evaluation, sir.

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

Good eye, kid, and of course they are. Psychology is as much of a science as anything else, isn't it?

video; 1.2

[herocomplex]

_{[ America cocks his head, then considers. ]}

HAHAHAHA, YES. I love science and I'll attribute to it! Give me a second and I'll get this to you, okay?

text; 2.2

[herocomplex]

_{[ and he's texts this back, editing it just a little. ]}


Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS
Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE)

1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called?

ALFRED F. JONES, THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, HERO OF THE UNIVERSE AND ALL THAT IS PURE AND JUSTICE-LIKE IN IT

2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.
1] dizziness
2] shortness of breath
3] problems waking up in the morning
4] problems staying up 48 hours straight
5] have not previously performed an enrichment center program
6] Doctors can suck my dick.

3) What is your favorite color?
tl'dr

4) How do others describe your education?
01] Nursery School
02] Grade School
03] Junior High
04] High School
05] Some College
06] Associates Degree
07] Bachelors
08] Graduate Degree
09] PhD / Post Doctoral
10] None
11] American

5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?
1] 1 Day
2] 2-5 Days
3] 7-14 Days
4] 14-30 Days
5] 30-90 Days
6] 90 Days - 6 Months
7] 1 Year
8] Greater Than 1 Year
9] record breaking of 2.34 seconds when conscious

6) Your favorite color is:
tl'dr

7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:
1] Sorry
2] Not Sorry
3] ****PATRIOTIC****

8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?
1] Yes
2] No
3 ] FUCKING COMMUNIST. DICKS. DICKWADS.

9) What is your favorite meal?
1] Lunch
2] Dinner
3] All of the above

10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:
01] Childish <-- NO
02] Oafish
03] Stolid
04] Timid
05] Reserved
06] Conceited <-- I'M THE HUMBLEST PERSON IN THE WORLD.
07] Scornful
08] Boastful
09] Sleepy
10] Stable
11] Heroic, manly, sexy, heroic, American, hero, heroic, amazing, awesome, lovable, heroic.

11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?
tl'dr

12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?
1] Yes
2] No
3] All of the above

13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.
1] Strongly Disagree
2] Disagree
3] Agree
4] Strongly Agree
5] N/A

14) You are a liar:
1] Can't Honestly Disagree
2] Agree
3] Strongly Agree
4] Communists lie.

15) Please acknowledge before continuing:
I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.
1] I have read all or most of the above.

16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?
1] Yes
2] No
3] All the above

17) Do you trust yourself?
1] FUCK YES
2] No

18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?
1] *********Yes***********
2] No

19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?
1] Yes
2] No

20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
1] Yes - ALL THE TIME
2] No

21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:
01] 1- Slight Pain
02] 2
03] 3
04] 4
05] 5 - Regular Pain
06] 6
07] 7
08] 8
09] 9
10] 10 - Worst Pain Imaginable
11 ] UNSTOPPABLE LIKE SUPERMAN

22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you:
I am often:
01] worried that life is vague and unreal
02] suspicious of the actions of others
03] prejudiced in favor of my own department, lab, product, skin color, etc.
04] convinced that nobody really cares about me
05] disturbed by the noise of the wind
06] enraged by the petty foibles of those around me
07] irritated by my past failures and children
08] too depressed to kill an animal or colleague in order to put it out of its pain
09] convinced of the correctness of my opinions on subjects about which I am not an expert
10] speaking very slowly for no apparent reason
11] NOT HEROIC AND TOO SEXY FOR MY SHIRT.

23) Complete this sentence,

24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?
1] Yes
2] No
3] I never let anybody down.

25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.
1] The test caused excruciating pain.
2] The participant felt excruciating pain.
3] I like to eat cake while excruciating.

26) Pick your favorite type of cake.
01] Angel food cake
02] Apple cake
03] Babka
04] Battenburg cake
05] Baumkuchen
06] Birthday cake
07] Black Forest cake
08] Buccellato
09] Bundt cake
10] Butter cake
11] Butterfly cake
12] Carrot cake
13] Cheesecake
14] Chocolate cake
15] Christmas cake
16] Chiffon cake
17] Croquembouche
18] Cupcake
19] Date and walnut loaf
20] Devil's food cake
21] Eccles cake
22] Fairy cake
23] Fifteens
24] Fruit cake
25] Sponge cake
26] Génoise Cake
27] Gingerbread
28] Gob
29] Gooey butter cake
30] Honey cake
31] Hot milk cake
32] Hummingbird cake
33] Ice cream cake
34] Jaffa Cakes
35] Suncake
36] Mooncake
37] Orehnjac(a
38] Pancake
39] Panettone
40] Petit fours
41] Pineapple Upside Down Cake
42] Pound cake
43] Queen Elizabeth cake
44] Red bean cake
45] Red velvet cake
46] Rhubarb cake
47] Sachertorte
48] St. Honore Cake
49] Simnel cake
50] Spice cake
51] German chocolate cake
52] Stack cake
53] Leavened cake, Hefekuchen
54] Tarte Tatin
55] Teacake
56] Tres leches cake
57] Vanilla slice
58] Vanilla Crazy Cake
59] Victoria Sponge
60] Wedding cake
61] All of the above

27) Gender

HERO

28) Your arm number:
001 > 176

39) What is your height and weight?
1] Short and unhealthy
2] Short and stout
3] Average and ugly
4] Tall and ungainly
5] Tall and fat
6] Tall and short
7 ] Heroic and sexy and not fat never fat fat is a dick.

30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.
1] FUCK YES
2] No

Congratulations!

You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE).


FUCK YEAH YOU GUYS CAN THANK ME IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE LATER. I get candy or something, right?

[consulting]

Bored. Go ahead.


Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS
Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE)

1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called? Sherlock Holmes and you can call me anything provided you take my word as gospel.

2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.
3] problems waking up in the morning

3) What is your favorite color?
13] Zinnwaldite

4) How do others describe your education?
09] PhD / Post Doctoral

5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?
3] 7-14 Days ( Black Mood )

6) Your favorite color is: Answered previously.

7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:
2] Not Sorry. Was not lying.

8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?
1] Yes

9) What is your favorite meal?
3.] I don't eat. Eating slows down mental capacity.

10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:
Ask John I'm sure he'll be keen to give you an over-flourished description of me.

11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?
I prefer doing the interrogation.

12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?
1] Yes. See Mycroft Holmes, British Government.

13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.
4] Strongly Agree

14) You are a liar:
Only when convenient.

15) Please acknowledge before continuing:
I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.
1] I have read all or most of the above.

16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?
2] No

17) Do you trust yourself?
2] No

18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?
2] No. Yes, but I don't see why.

19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?
2] No

20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
1] Yes. But that may be the cocaine.

21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:
08] 8

22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you:
I am often:
08] too depressed to kill an animal or colleague in order to put it out of its pain


23) Complete this sentence, dull.

24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?
2] No

25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.
3] I like to eat cake while excruciating.

26) Pick your favorite type of cake.
34] Jaffa Cakes

27) Gender Male.

28) Your arm number:

39) What is your height and weight?
6] Tall and short ( Answer is oxymoronic )

30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.
2] No

Congratulations!

You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE).


[audio]

[cave_johnson]

You don't eat? How do I know you're not lying to me?

Where's the cocaine.

voice;

[firstofficer]

To what purpose is this questionnaire directed?

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

Science, of course. Figure'd if we got these little numbers and letters on our arms that means there's a reason behind them. Right now's just a matter of figuring out where all the people puzzle pieces fit in.

dear self: no more with the fancy html attempts...

[peanutblooder]


Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS
Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE)

1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called? Pupa Pan

2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.
1] dizziness X
2] shortness of breath
3] problems waking up in the morning
4] problems staying up 48 hours straight
5] have not previously performed an enrichment center program X

3) What is your favorite color?
01] Peach-orange
02] Powder blue
03] Cyan
04] Chartreuse
05] Jade
06] Dark coral
07] Navy blue
08] Pale mauve
09] Linen
10] Dark goldenrod
11] Pumpkin
12] Dark cerulean
13] Zinnwaldite
14] Rust
15] Lavender Blush
16] Green
17] Lilac
18] Blue
19] Midnight Blue
20] Tan
21] Carmine
22] Amber
23] Indigo
24] Pale red-violet
25] Lemon Cream
26] Pale chestnut
27] Bondi Blue
28] Gamboge
29] Gold
30] Steel blue
31] Tangerine
32] Lime
33] Seashell
34] Pale pink
35] Dark turquoise
36] Pale cornflower blue
37] Denim
38] Emerald
39] Burnt Sienna
40] Buff
41] Brown
42] Pear
43] Orangatang Red
44] Chestnut
45] Cerulean
46] Dark Tea Green
47] Dark salmon
48] Sandy brown
49] Dark tan
50] Pine Green
51] Flax
52] Ochre
53] Bronze
54] Klein Blue
55] Pale Sandy Brown
56] Teal
57] Azure
58] Dark Terra cotta
59] International orange
60] Red
61] Orange
62] Safety Orange
63] Coral
64] Scarlet
65] Light brown
66] Olive Drab
67] Magenta
68] Bistre
69] Cerulean blue
70] Dodger blue
71] Cobalt
72] Violet-eggplant
73] Amethyst
74] Sapphire
75] Ultramarine
76] Fuchsia
77] Heliotrope
78] Cinnamon
79] Chocolate X
80] Goldenrod
81] Sea Green
82] Pastel pink
83] Persian blue
84] Mountbatten pink
85] Pale carmine
86] Bright green
87] Turquoise
88] Gray
89] Gray-Tea Green
90] Dark blue
91] Cerise
92] Pale brown
93] Green-yellow
94] Raw umber
95] Lavender

4) How do others describe your education?
01] Nursery School
02] Grade School
03] Junior High
04] High School
05] Some College
06] Associates Degree
07] Bachelors
08] Graduate Degree
09] PhD / Post Doctoral
10] None
uH, i DID NOT RECEIVE HUMAN EDUCATION?

5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?
1] 1 Day
2] 2-5 Days
3] 7-14 Days
4] 14-30 Days
5] 30-90 Days
6] 90 Days - 6 Months
7] 1 Year
8] Greater Than 1 Year

6) Your favorite color is:
01] Camouflage green
02] Sangria
03] Salmon
04] Pale magenta
05] Swamp green
06] Pastel green
07] Carrot
08] Burgundy
09] Mint Green
10] Wheat
11] Aqua
12] Thistle
13] Vermilion
14] School bus yellow
15] Khaki
16] Cornflower blue
17] Dark light blue
18] Dark slate gray
19] Mustard
20] Hot pink
21] Dark pastel green
22] Dark brown
23] Papaya whip
24] Dark spring green
25] Cooked umber
26] Dark chestnut
27] Dark Khaki
28] Russet
29] Burnt umber
30] Wisteria
31] Beige
32] Selective yellow
33] Viridian
34] Old Gold
35] Mauve
36] Dark violet
37] Dark pink
38] Aquamarine
39] Slate gray
40] Royal Blue
41] Terra cotta
42] Blaze Orange
43] Dark Indigo
44] Violet
45] Dark tangerine
46] Saffron
47] Olive
48] Tenné
49] Peach
50] Maroon
51] Silver
52] Robin egg blue
53] Pink
54] Asparagus
55] Purple
56] Pale Blue
57] Dark green
58] Yankee Yellow
59] Navajo white
60] Fern green
61] Bright violet
62] Corn
63] Eggplant
64] Bright turquoise
65] Gray-asparagus
66] Moss green
67] Taupe
68] Dark Olive
69] Red-violet
70] Burnt Orange
71] Orchid
72] Peach-yellow
73] Spring Green
74] Lemon
75] Puce
76] Periwinkle
77] Celadon
78] Dark Scarlet
79] Yellow
80] Black
81] Alizarin Crimson
82] Prussian blue
83] Malachite
84] Dark Peach
85] White
86] Brass
87] Cardinal
88] Alice Blue
89] Cream
90] Tea Green
91] Sepia
92] Crimson
93] Copper
94] Pink-orange

7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:
1] Sorry X
2] Not Sorry

8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?
1] Yes
2] No X

9) What is your favorite meal?
1] Lunch
2] Dinner X

10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:
01] Childish
02] Oafish
03] Stolid
04] Timid X
05] Reserved
06] Conceited
07] Scornful
08] Boastful
09] Sleepy
10] Stable

11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?
01] Going Next Door
02] Pain
03] Nobody Loves You X
04] The All-Seeing Eye
05] The Barbering Curriculum
06] The Informer
07] News from Home
08] The Witness
09] Joint Suspects
10] The Big Bang
11] Pearls Before Swine
12] Chicken Button
13] Death Eats a Sandwich
14] Hammerhead
15] Hammerhand
16] Fried Hole
17] Hangri-La
18] Ivan Is a Dope
19] Joint Interrogators
20] Law of Partial Pressure
21] The Spinoza
22] Gospel Shark
23] Cloud Cuckoo Land
24] The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing
25] Good Cop / Ventriloquist Cop
26] Alice in Wonderland
27] Monster Polygraph
28] Confession is Good for the Soul
29] Silver Tongued Devil
30] Deep Sea Diver
31] Pay The Piper
32] Federal Bikini Inspector
33] Big Wig
34] Carlsbad Caverns
35] The Boy Who Cried
36] Goonland
37] Role-Role Theory
38] Zipf's Law
39] Stream of Unconsciousness
40] Flash in the Pan
41] The Little Bird
42] Welcome to Bethany
43] Ampere's Rule
44] The Dental Assistant

12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?
1] Yes
2] No X

13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.
1] Strongly Disagree
2] Disagree
3] Agree
4] Strongly Agree
5] N/A X

14) You are a liar:
1] Can't Honestly Disagree
2] Agree
3] Strongly Agree
uHH, nONE OF THESE QUESTIONS ALLOW ME TO ANSWER ACCURATELY,

15) Please acknowledge before continuing:
I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.
1] I have read all or most of the above. X

16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?
1] Yes X
2] No

17) Do you trust yourself?
1] Yes
2] No X

18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?
1] Yes
2] No X

19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?
1] Yes X
2] No

20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
1] Yes
2] No X

21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:
01] 1- Slight Pain
02] 2
03] 3
04] 4
05] 5 - Regular Pain
06] 6
07] 7
08] 8
09] 9
10] 10 - Worst Pain Imaginable X

22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you:
I am often:
01] worried that life is vague and unreal
02] suspicious of the actions of others
03] prejudiced in favor of my own department, lab, product, skin color, etc.
04] convinced that nobody really cares about me
05] disturbed by the noise of the wind
06] enraged by the petty foibles of those around me
07] irritated by my past failures and children
08] too depressed to kill an animal or colleague in order to put it out of its pain
09] convinced of the correctness of my opinions on subjects about which I am not an expert
10] speaking very slowly for no apparent reason

23) Complete this sentence,

24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?
1] Yes X
2] No

25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.
1] The test caused excruciating pain. X
2] The participant felt excruciating pain.
3] I like to eat cake while excruciating.

26) Pick your favorite type of cake.
01] Angel food cake
02] Apple cake X
03] Babka
04] Battenburg cake
05] Baumkuchen
06] Birthday cake
07] Black Forest cake
08] Buccellato
09] Bundt cake
10] Butter cake
11] Butterfly cake
12] Carrot cake
13] Cheesecake
14] Chocolate cake
15] Christmas cake
16] Chiffon cake
17] Croquembouche
18] Cupcake
19] Date and walnut loaf
20] Devil's food cake
21] Eccles cake
22] Fairy cake
23] Fifteens
24] Fruit cake
25] Sponge cake
26] Génoise Cake
27] Gingerbread
28] Gob
29] Gooey butter cake
30] Honey cake
31] Hot milk cake
32] Hummingbird cake
33] Ice cream cake
34] Jaffa Cakes
35] Suncake
36] Mooncake
37] Orehnjac(a
38] Pancake
39] Panettone
40] Petit fours
41] Pineapple Upside Down Cake
42] Pound cake
43] Queen Elizabeth cake
44] Red bean cake
45] Red velvet cake
46] Rhubarb cake
47] Sachertorte
48] St. Honore Cake
49] Simnel cake
50] Spice cake
51] German chocolate cake
52] Stack cake
53] Leavened cake, Hefekuchen
54] Tarte Tatin
55] Teacake
56] Tres leches cake
57] Vanilla slice
58] Vanilla Crazy Cake
59] Victoria Sponge
60] Wedding cake

27) Gender: male

28) Your arm number: 002 >> 002

39) What is your height and weight?
1] Short and unhealthy
2] Short and stout
3] Average and ugly X
4] Tall and ungainly
5] Tall and fat
6] Tall and short

30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.
1] Yes X
2] No

Congratulations!

You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE).


[audio] Tavros you are so cute

[cave_johnson]

Thank you--I'll have Wheatley process these pronto.

...You aren't an orphan by chance are you?

[text]

[lookingsharp]

So you're the one in charge?

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

Sure am. Or will be. Who's askin'?

audio;

[unwaveringloyalty]

Your efforts lack an explanation.

[audio]

[cave_johnson]

For the purpose and intent of science. Simple as that.

text;

[laufeysons]

[ Completely disregarding the form, that looks like a huge waste of time. And he has other priorities. ]

But who is responsible for the numbers?

[audio] I miss edit I am so sorry.

[cave_johnson]

Probably someone dead or equally unhelpful. I figure they were inscribed sometime while we were inside those blue people pods. Coulda' done any number of inordinate and unethical things to our bodies and all they do is put numbers on us.

[Does... does he sound disappointed?]

Get some computer whiz to tap into the computers in that room, I bet it'd give a clue. Or a nasty headache, either or.

[Implied said computer whiz will report back to Cave without asking.]

[text]

[the_crowing]

Soem other guy said I should do this. I had time so... what the hell. Here.


Loaded: ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION PROCESS
Form: FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE)

1) If given a choice, what would you like to be called?
Lord of the Underworlds

2) It is important to consult a physician or MEDICAL STAFF before starting an Aperture Science Enrichment Center program. If one or more of the statements listed below applies to you, please contact your supervisor to secure permission to consult a physician before beginning an Enrichment Center program. Pick the condition that most applies to you.
3] problems waking up in the morning
5] have not previously performed an enrichment center program

3) What is your favorite color?
88] Gray

4) How do others describe your education?
04] High School

5) Not including periods of mandatory silence, what is the longest you have gone voluntarily without talking?
2] 2-5 Days

6) Your favorite color is:
39] Slate gray

7) Lying about my favorite color makes me feel:
2] Not Sorry

8) Are you plagued by suspicions that other people, including coworkers and relatives, may be doing things behind your back that will hurt you?
1] Yes

9) What is your favorite meal?
Neither

10) Please choose the description that best describes your personality:
07] Scornful

11) Which interrogation technique do you think would be most effective on you?
25] Good Cop / Ventriloquist Cop
32] Federal Bikini Inspector
These sound interesting...

12) Have you experienced recurrent thoughts of regicide?
2] No

13) If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, please rate the following statement: I know what 'regicide' means.
5] N/A
I do know what it means though.

14) You are a liar:
1] Can't Honestly Disagree

15) Please acknowledge before continuing:
I understand that my responses to all items in this questionnaire are the property of Aperture Science, The Tranquility, Space. As such, they will remain strictly confidential, though they may be used to distribute prizes and/or initiate, prolong, or modify the invasive properties of authorized questioning, investigation, testing, and surveillance.
1] I have read all or most of the above.

16) Are you functionally incapacitated by witnessing other people's misery?
2] No

17) Do you trust yourself?
2] No

18) If you disappeared tomorrow would anyone miss you?
2] No

19) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful?
_____

20) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
2] No

21) Rate the pain you have been able to withstand without losing consciousness:
08] 8

22) Complete the following statement with the answer that DOES NOT apply to you:
I am often:
06] enraged by the petty foibles of those around me

23) Complete this sentence, because someone didn't bother to complete it for me.

24) Do you feel bad that you have let your coworkers and/or larger mandated collective down?
1] Yes

25) Pick the sentence that incorrectly employs the word 'excruciating'.
3] I like to eat cake while excruciating.

26) Pick your favorite type of cake.
None

27) Gender
Male

28) Your arm number:
Data Not Found

39) What is your height and weight?
6] Tall and short
Best Answer Ever

30) I have completed this form without the assistance of someone else.
1] Yes

Congratulations!

You have finished the ENRICHMENT CENTER TEST SUBJECT APPLICATION FORMS-EN-2873C-FORM (PART1: PERSONALITY & GENERAL KNOWLEDGE).


[audio]

[cave_johnson]

Pleasure to make your acquaintance Lord of the Underworlds. I'll have Wheatley process these Pronto.

...Data Not Found, you missing an arm or something, son?