[ Iiiiit's Edgeworth! It's Edgeworth looking a little bit worse for wear. His face is blotchy around the eyes. ]

Good day. Miles Edgeworth, with Security.

[ Edgeworth's introduction is terser than usual, and his face is decidedly ill-tempered. And his speech is considerably less formal than usual: a lot of his usual pomposity is gone, in the face of sheer crabbiness. Indeed, instead of polite administrative announcements going first, he hops right into a snappish lecture.

(There's a little bit of nervousness to this, under the surface. In a weird way, it might almost seem to the keen observer that he's sort of minimizing the gravity of this by framing it as a don't-be-stupid issue rather than a you-all-have-committed-criminal-deeds issue.) ]

Do not touch things that look suspicious. You all have been on the ship now for a minimum of a month and for a maximum of two years. You are all familiar with how things work by this point. You know perfectly well that there's no end to the death-traps that the ship sets. So I honestly do not know why I have to say this to a single one of you, but if - hypothetically - there's an eerie painting of one of your fellow passengers, perhaps don't mutilate it. Perhaps just walk past it. Perhaps ignore it. Honestly, you're all intelligent people; begin acting as such.

[ And then he crosses his arms even tighter, and scowls deeper, and says: ]

Anyone who has evidence that their depictions were tampered with by someone acting with malice aforethought, do come to me or one of my colleagues. Reckless stupidity is not something we have any interest in pursuing, since that would put rather too many of you in the brig. But any attempts to deliberately do harm to others, with awareness of the consequences, during the last incident - that will be dealt with.

[Finn turns on the camera, pushing it back so it can capture him. He's sitting cross-legged on something, the lockers at the medbay if anyone can see that well.]

So. This is boring. I mean, other than the freaky murals and voices and stuff. How many people drew mustaches on people? Be honest. Sergeant Edgeworth says Security isn't interested.

On the subject of I'm bored, why don't we throw any parties around here? Like dance parties, music, food, people? Or spacewalks! Why aren't we going out and having some killer fun in space?

Unrelated, but do we have any metalworking equipment and scraps I could use? I literally have nothing but the clothes on my back, so I'd have to give out an IOU.