002 | audio

[suddenlycaptain]

[ Carolyn hasn't been here for long but she's been here long enough to notice things, and one of the things she's noticed is that most of these people have no real idea of how dangerous space can be. Some of them, sure -- Riddick, of course. Ellen, Kara, Clarke, Kirk and his crew -- but there are others who've never been in space before, even people who come from a place where it isn't possible yet. Fry doesn't want these people to die because of a stupid mistake, and she doesn't want a stupid mistake to be what kills all of them out here, either. ]

There are a lot of people here who haven't been in space before. I'm going to give you all some advice -- and honestly, if you know someone who's been in space, who knows spaceships, listen to them about this sort of thing. I know weird shit happens on this ship, but that smiley face isn't the only hazard out here.

I'm going to give you all a list of some of the dangers in space -- verbally, as there have been complaints [ you're welcome, Ros ] but I can give you a text version, too. If you have questions, feel free to ask, though I'm not a doctor or a physicist or an engineer and you might be better off asking one of them about some of these. And before anyone says it, I'm not trying to cause mass panic here -- but these are things you need to know, things everyone needs to keep in mind so nothing stupid and lethal happens.

- Disease/other health concerns. A lot of you just experienced this, and judging by what I've seen on the network, I'm sure Dr. McCoy will be happy to help educate you all on a variety of them. There are a lot of health concerns, from alien diseases to Earth viruses that spread easily in close quarters like this. We should all hope the artificial gravity doesn't go out anytime soon either, because being in 0g harms bone density. It also makes you more likely to have kidney stones. Space is also filled with radiation, and unless you're magically immune to it, high exposure is going to lead to health problems as well. Be smart. Wear protective gear, use a condom, wash your hands.

- Equipment malfunctions. We're already suffering a lot of those. With communications out, we can't call for help. With two working shuttles, we can't all get out of here if we need to -- if you're a mechanic or a pilot and you haven't been helping out with the shuttles, get on that. Life support is called that for a reason; if that goes down, we're all pretty much fucked. A breach in the hull, a loose seal, a lot of shit could lead to all the oxygen in the ship being sucked out into space and then we're all suffocating. Don't shoot the fucking side of the ship. Take up Judo if you have to, Alice is offering to teach. Same with high temperatures and electricity, apparently; keep that away from the sensitive equipment and pretty much everything else.

- Debris and other objects. I don't know how this system is with putting shit into space but they had real problems back on Earth, a couple thousand years ago. Hunks of satellites, bits of spaceships -- the speed at which they can move through space is enough for a chip of paint to put a small crater in something. Dust from meteors can accumulate into clouds that can rip the insulation off and knock ships off-course. Let's hope whoever is flying this thing looks out for the big ones, at least, and let's hope it's got some decent shields to protect against flying space dust.

- Extreme temperatures. You're not going to freeze to death automatically, you'll probably suffocate first, but don't get stuck outside. Even if you have a spacesuit, a problem in either the insulation or the cooling -- because those things are hot inside -- could kill you.

- Electricity. Solar storms can fry equipment. Space is dry, too; there's more of a chance of static electricity and a lot of it. Apparently we've got people around here who can control the weather, too, so do us all a favor and don't fry anything.

- "Moondust". Not likely to be a problem unless someone goes walking around outside, but they say the dust from Earth's moon is thick and hazardous enough to kill you. It's the same sort of symptoms you get in miners, if that helps anyone. I've never been to Earth or its moon but there are plenty of planets and other moons that are the same way. If you go out in that spacesuit, wipe your feet so you don't get dust in all of our lungs.

- Fuel shortage. You don't actually need fuel to go once you've started going. You need it to speed up, slow down, and you need it to stop. We run out of fuel, we'll keep going until we run into something.

- Other supply shortages. I'm guessing no one wants to starve to death.

- Hostile sentient beings. Whether it's governments, pirates, mercs, or slavers, we're not the only ship out in the black. A ship like this is huge, probably not something most people would want to mess with, but we're also crippled. They look too closely, realize our comms are out, someone might try something. This especially includes cults, since they typically can't even be reasoned with.

- Other hostile lifeforms. Creatures, big or small. There have already been some science experiments -- and for fuck's sake, nobody try and recreate any sort of shit like that -- but I'm talking natural animals. There are all sorts of creatures in space -- some of them harmless, some of them extremely dangerous. Parasites, predators, prey, and things that are just damn annoying -- we're not likely to bump into any just floating in the black, but we could pick something up at a station or on a planet.

- Hostile environments. Not every planet's going to be like wherever you came from. Some have more or less oxygen, more or less gravity. Some are deserts, others have suns so intense you will die if you stay outside during the day. Do your research, if at all possible.

- Black holes. Not the little ones that shouldn't exist but do, in that maze, though don't go near those either. Big ones that'll suck us in if we get too close. You can see how that might be a problem.

- Exploding stars. Pretty self-explanatory. Stars that explode.

- Drugs. I don't care about the people smoking in the oxygen garden but if people start lifting medical supplies to get high, then we're going to have problems. Medical, keep an eye on your morphine. The rest of you, don't steal drugs to get high. If you're having withdrawals, go talk to a doctor. That's why we have them.

It's been eight months without the ship imploding on itself. Let's keep these in mind and not do something stupid to change that. I don't care if you're a psychotic mass murderer who thinks it'd be fun; you do one of these and you're probably going to end up dead, too.

Comments

[suddenlycaptain]

Absolutely. Do you have experience in that sort of thing?

[counselling]

I do. I'm a counsellor - ships counsellor.

[suddenlycaptain]

It must be a larger ship, to have its own counselor on board.

[counselling]

It was. The Enterprise [ D ] had over one thousand crew and civilian passengers. [ Although this ship... far bigger ]

[suddenlycaptain]

Can I ask what its purpose was?

[counselling]

We made first contact with a number of species, conducted diplomatic missions as well as exploring further into the galaxy. [ For a few things ]

[suddenlycaptain]

A government ship, then? [ That would definitely explain the need for a counselor on board. ]

[counselling]

Not exactly. [ There was a government on Earth, if you viewed it in such terms. But the Federation (and the President on Earth) was bigger than that ] The Enterprise is part of the United Federation of Planets, races which work together with the same goals.

[suddenlycaptain]

That sounds like a sort of government to me.

[ But she shrugs; it's not her universe, so she's not inclined to argue about it. ]

We don't have anything like that where I'm from. About the most you'll find are united systems.

[counselling]

United against something or towards something?

[suddenlycaptain]

Depends on the system. Usually it just makes commerce easier.

[counselling]

I would call that positive. [ And there's a small pause between the statement and: ] Can I ask what your experience with space is?

[suddenlycaptain]

Pilot and captain. I'm more at home flying than I am planetside, to be honest.

[counselling]

[ It's an unusual mix, for Deanna to hear of anyway - but different worlds, as the other woman said ] How long have you served?

[suddenlycaptain]

[ It's an unusual mix for her world, too -- Carolyn is the captain only because the other two members of the crew, the original captain and the navigator, were killed. But she's kept that to herself, because after what they went through... reluctantly or not, she's the captain now. ]

With or without cryosleep? [ Don't let her tone fool you -- she hates cryosleep. ] I've been flying since I was a kid. As soon as someone legitimate would hire me, I snatched a job up and haven't looked back.

[counselling]

[ And Deanna's seeing again just have different it all is - vastly. If this discussion were any other time she may ask more of the questions she's curious about - it would be interesting to compare situations ]

It sounds like quite the career. [ And very long, for one - a lot of good officers never make it so long ]

[suddenlycaptain]

It's been a lot of deep space hours and interesting people, if nothing else.

[ Carolyn's young -- mid- to late-twenties, physically. Her world is rough, snatching up children for all sorts of reasons. Criminals, slaves, fresh cult members -- many children don't have the luck that she had. She knows she's lucky for it, even if her career -- and her life -- recently came to an untimely end. ]

[counselling]

Was your ship a commerce ship or did it have another mission?

[suddenlycaptain]

No, we're a merchant vessel. Cargo and passengers, sometimes more of one than the other but it all depends on the trip.

[counselling]

You'll have seen a lot of the galaxy. [ Or however far her routes took her. Some Federation cargo vessels could travel quite far ]

[suddenlycaptain]

A lot of systems, a lot of planets. None of them are here though, as far as I can tell.

[counselling]

From what I've seen from available data this galaxy is far from anywhere the Federation is seen before. [ Including Voyager ] I haven't heard of anyone familiar with where we are.

[suddenlycaptain]

Neither have I. [ She sighs. ] I know space is large, but it's still unsettling, to spend so much time there and not know where I am now.

[counselling]

There may be one time we meet up with something familiar, but familiar to who would be the question.

[suddenlycaptain]

And familiar doesn't necessarily mean good, either.

[ Another sigh. ] Guess we'll find out when that happens.