video;

[martyrs]

[ Elena doesn't look different compared to the last time she popped up on the network, she refuses to think she looks any different or sounds any different, but she is feeling a bit wary, on edge. like even posting an entry on this little communication device might be some kinda risk, now that she's... what she is. for someone that wasn't hit with the space-plague, she still looks very tired. less excited to be here with her family, anyway, since it just means they all have been dealing with a different level of drama than they did back in Mystic Falls. ]

I'm sure someone's already asked this - but what are we going to do if everyone gets sick again? Do we know what caused it yet? [ yes, she's worried about her friends and family. and about being surrounded by people who were bleeding uncontrollably, yeah, that too. Elena hasn't had any huge issues with control, but the idea of it becoming a regular thing scares her more than she'll let on. ] I'm just worried that the cure won't last forever, that's all. Or that it'll only get worse if it ever does come back.

-- Wow, I'm being such a downer right now, sorry about that. The space plague shook me up worse than I thought, apparently. [ a small 'why am I even talking right now' smile forms at that ] I guess what I'm trying to ask is if there's anything we should do? You know, to prepare for it. I just want to know what I can do to keep my friends safe.

---
[( MYSTIC FALLS ENCRYPTION: 80% )
I don't know how else to say this, so I'll just say it:

The last time we all went to sleep in those pod-tube-things, I went back home. For what felt like months, but I guess it wasn't. I don't really know how it works. [ not the poooint, get on with it, right ] Either way. We've all been through a lot, more than I ever realized, and I know that now. And I don't know who else has been through everything that I experienced, but, there's one thing I know I need to say, even if we're from different points in time, just because I owe you all that much honesty. [ if she sounds like she's reading from a cue card, it's because she doesn't really- it's still processing. she's still trying to figure it out. so she sounds unreasonably calm, focused. she might've practiced what she wants to say just to make sure she doesn't talk her way out of it midway through the transmission ]

Matt and I got into a car accident. A bad one, on Wickery Bridge. He got out, Stefan got him out, but I-- drowned. I died. But somehow, and I really don't know how, I ended up waking up here, in transition. Since then I drank human blood, I finished the cycle, and now I'm a vampire.

Yeah. I'm still trying to figure out what happened exactly, and I'm not by any means 100% okay with it, but I wanted to explain myself. For my hermit-like behavior. I'm sorry I didn't say anything sooner.

[ ..... SIGH. YEP. THAT'S A THING THAT HAPPENED. it's weird confessing that sort of thing over Space Skype. but. there it is. ]

And now I'm really hungry. Is there such a thing as stress eating for vampires? Not that I'm stressing. But. The two bags I got from the medbay last week are gone already. I didn't-- mean to, I just got... hungry, yeah. And I'm not freaking out or crazy craving or anything, but it's getting to the point where people's pulses are just jumping in my head whenever I'm anywhere near more than a few people at a time, and it's really loud, like it's just trying to remind me how hungry I am, and--

Is this weird to talk about this stuff like this? I don't want to keep anything from you guys. Because what's the point, right? I figure trying to ignore it will only make it worse. Right?

Alright, so maybe I am stressing out a little.

Comments

voice ; same filter

[unparental]

Honestly? Alcohol. It-- took me a while, too. To get used to the cravings.

...I can take you down to medbay with me when I grab blood from now on, if you want.

voice ; same filter

[martyrs]

I guess I kinda lucked out with that new bar opening up recently, huh?

[ she's not laughing, but there's a bigger smile there now ]

Can we? I don't think I'm ready to tell everyone just yet, I need to make sure I've got a hold on it - well, as much of a hold as I'll ever have anyway - before I let people know. But. Yeah, I'd rather not go alone.

[ :c hold her hand through this aunt jenna she so needs it ]

VIDEO; locked to the doppelgangers 57%

[manipulativni]

You're welcome, by the way.

[ ...way to be sympathetic to her plight, katherine. ]

VIDEO; locked to the doppelgangers 57%

[martyrs]

[ her lips press shut for a second, because she was 90% sure that's where Damon got the blood, but it was never confirmed. now she knows. ]

Thank you.

Really, I owe you. I don't know what Damon said or agreed to, but it was for me, and so I owe you for it, not him.

video; that cool filter

[surrogates]

[ there's a muscle in ric's jaw that twitches when he hears this story again. it's not that he's mad at elena, no, she couldn't have helped it happening to her- though the blood makes him wonder- instead he's just angry at himself. he was- she was his daughter (step-daughter, but that's a technicality) and he was supposed to protect her. keep her safe. make it so jenna's death wasn't in vain. and look what he did, let her die.

(he doesn't stop to think of how he didn't stop her, maybe he had died too, he honestly doesn't want to know. ]

That story doesn't get any better the second time around. [ a beat. ] And considering the fact that our current count of vampires and other supernatural creatures from home includes everyone...but me, and vampires are all but two. Not the weirdest topic of conversation.

I can pick up more in between to supplement things. Also maybe real food.

video; that cool filter

[martyrs]

I'm sorry.

[ no, she'll never stop apologizing for how things turned out. on some level of their bond, after everything, Alaric and Elena had an understanding over... not being vampires, as odd as that is. they were human with very human abilities and minds ( minus her doppelganger blood thing, and his ring thing ), and as humans they had to train the same way, fight the same way, for the same reasons. now that sort of mutual bond was shaken up, and she hates it. hates it. it's not something she'll voice, but it is a constant worry now. what if this changes things? what if he thinks she won't need him? the thought makes her feel like she owes him more than just an assurance that she'll always be there, but. how can she fix this? ]

Has there been any luck on the finding-coffee front? I was thinking about asking that man that was talking about his tea shop... Maybe I can make some kind of trade. [ must... have... caffeine... ]

video; team mystic falls sans klaus 80%

[disparage]

[ the big bonus is that caroline no longer resembles a smurf. she's worried herself about the cure being temporary, but that's not really important in face of other events. caroline can't say she's pleased with this. this wasn't supposed to happen. everything they did seemed for naught now that elena wouldn't be able to live the life she was meant to. the fact that she found out through damon makes caroline grind her teeth, but at least time and memories no longer keep them apart. it's just the other stuff that only seems to pile on between them as the shit continues to hit the fan. ]

Stefan needs to teach you his breathing techniques. It really helps push those veins back where they belong.

[ it did when she made the effort to keep them at bay with matt. but she's sure that damon and stefan have gone over the basics. she's not really sure what she's meant to say, besides this was never meant to happen to you. how the hell did she let this happen? ]

Alcohol helps. And eating a lot of food. I'm sure - [ elena probably doesn't really need her for this. she can barely keep herself afloat. ] - Jenna can probably tell you. I barely know what's available around here besides goo.

video; team mystic falls sans klaus 80%

[martyrs]

He's been showing me some things, one step at a time. Though it's kinda taken me this long to come to terms with it? So I haven't... been all that willing a student. Plus the past few weeks have been kinda crazy.

[ with Stefan being sick. it was easy to ignore her hunger pains when she had Stefan to focus on, keeping him distracted from whatever they were all sick with. now she's just left with some cravings and a lack of blood bags. not so great. ]

We should find out then, me and you. There's no point in us trying to figure everything out alone.

video; not on team mystic fails filter

[siring]

[Have a predatory grin. He could care less about keeping (most?) of your friends safe, so he'll just skip past all that and head straight to...]

Glad to see you well, Elena. I would be devastated to find that anything happened to you.

[Just your daily threat reminder that he thinks of you as a possession. Nothing new.]

video ; locked to klaus because fuck good life choices

[unparental]

What would it take to get you to leave her alone, right here and now?

video; not on team mystic fails filter

[martyrs]

[ HEH?!?!? ]

Hello, Klaus. I might be flattered if I believed you genuinely cared about my well-being. But seeing as you have a tendency to put me through hell...

[ I. REMEMBER. EVERYTHING. DICK. ]

[video]

[jurisimpudent]

Even if the cure does not hold, more of it can be synthesized, I am sure.

[video]

[martyrs]

Not exactly the most favorable option there is...

locked to the mystic falls filter;

[lockwood]

At this rate, none of us are going to still be human. [Yeah, that's helpful Tyler.]

locked to the mystic falls filter;

[surrogates]

[ so very helpful, tyler. ]

Unless I meet an accident where I for some reason have vampire blood in my system and die, we'll keep it at a consistent one.

locked to the mystic falls filter;

[martyrs]

[ a small sigh, and she's not sure she should be saying stuff like this, but; ]

I just keep telling myself that maybe it's better this way.

Like, maybe I should be glad I'm a vampire now, and not just a victim.

[ 'the one everybody has to protect' ]

[audio]

[yardbird]

Didn't think there was anything we could do 'bout it.

[But then, it'd just be like Murphy to resign to uselessness...]

[audio]

[martyrs]

There's always something we can do. Just have to look in the right places for the answer.

Only I've only been here for a few weeks, so I'm not sure where to start.

video; mystic filter

[dilemma]

Probably ease up on the blood talk around the non-suckers. They get squeamish.

[ honest, albeit teasing, advice from a now fully recovered and not at all blue damon. she's probably already heard all the tricks and secrets from the rest of the group but that's not going to stop damon from giving his lovely, unique, entirely necessary perspective on what she should be doing. ]

Stefan's going to tell you coffee curbs the cravings. It helps. Keeps the circulation going. Honestly? Alcohol is your true salvation.

[ he holds up a crystal glass partially filled with brown liquor for her to see with a wink, an awesome attempt at being enticing. ]

My advice? If you're hungry, then eat. We're on bag rations, I get it, but you're not doing anyone a favor by wanting to sample the crew.

video; mystic filter

[martyrs]

Non-suckers.

[ just a face at that, because really, what the. Damon. who lets you say things, honestly. ]

Yeah, I get it. Time to find a bottle of something stronger than grape juice. At least my tolerance won't be any different than it was before. Looks like I'll still be able to out-drink you, Mr. Salvatore.

[ YEAH lookin at you, mr lushypants. and now, because she's actually curious (and hopeful);]

Have you really been sticking to the bag diet?

video;

[inspirited]

It doesn't look like the cause is actually known yet as far as I know.

video;

[martyrs]

I wonder if we should just prepare to get hit with it again. Make sure there's enough of the cure for everyone? I hate the idea of us running out, or worse.

[ not having enough and trying to decide who gets it and who doesn't ]

video ; mystic falls filter (minus klaus :|) ; piggy-baked encryption

[angerissues]

Are you planning on sticking to the blood bag diet? [ Consider this Mason's warning about kicking the ass of any vampire from home that decides it's cool to munch on people here. If he finds out about it, of course.

He doesn't like vampires and he isn't exactly fond of most of the people here that're from home, but he's going to play nice until he's given reason not to. (Reason from Damon could be him looking at Mason the wrong way, but we won't go into that.) ]

video ; mystic falls filter (minus klaus :|) ; piggy-baked encryption

[martyrs]

Of course. I've never fed from a human and I don't plan on ever changing that.

[ YUP. all the confidence in the world on that front. ]

video »

[ripstides]

I've been wondering the same thing. So far, I think the only thing we can do is be ready to act. I mean, besides checking in with the Medbay on a regular basis.

video »

[martyrs]

I can't honestly say 'being patient' is in my repertoire of 'things I'm good at', but it does seem to be the only option. I guess I'm hoping someone will have an explanation for things. Something other than "well we have the cure, at least".

[ small siiiigh ]

Guess I'm getting a little frustrated over just not knowing.

video; same filter

[sainted]

Your supply's gone?

[His eyebrows are raised, for good reason. Regulating their blood bags hasn't been a huge issue, even with Stefan nearly dying at one point with no one but a newborn vampire to take care of him. But Elena did well. Amazingly, even. She'd refused to leave the room, but Stefan had every confidence she'd be able to manage herself when they finally parted.

He'd checked first. She had two full bags; she'd be fine for a couple of days. But it hasn't been that long since he'd left her. Stefan's expression softens. He understands, after all.]

Snacking does help. Really, any sort of indulgence helps when it comes to sublimating the cravings. Exercise too. Alcohol's the best thing there is for taking the edge off, but... I wouldn't depend on it. Being a drunk vampire has its downsides.

Elena... did something happen?

video; same filter

[martyrs]

No, nothing happened. Nothing new happened.

[ she's tactfully avoiding the first question, because yes, yes it is gone, and she has no good excuse for it other than not fighting the craving. she doesn't feel... crazy with it or anything, she's not still craving more, she's just worried that something wrong with her, wah wah ]

I think it was just- Like. How you think you can handle taking just one cookie from the jar? And then you end up bringing the jar back to your room and finishing it all up in five minutes.

[ SHEEPISH ]

Yeah, I'd say that's exactly me right now.