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Hullo, welcome to the Tranquility. [ Your welcome wagon is a tired-looking but pleasant Welshman. ] First things: we don't know precisely how you got here, we can't send you home, and you're probably not dead.
Second things: if you're injured or sick, talk to Medical. If you eat people or have other special needs, talk to Xenogen. If you need cigarettes, go beg Agriculture for work. [ He's reading all these ifs off a list, rote and sing-song, but now that he's reached the last bullet point he looks up and smiles, sort of. Still tired-looking. ] If you ignored all the graffiti warnings about living above the tenth floor, please note that in the event of an emergency, no one will be there to help you.
Any other questions or concerns, ask here or come by the Support office, and we'll do what we can. [ He's already moving to shut off the feed, but he pauses long enough to add, ] I know it's a lot, but it'll be all right.
[ ATTACHMENT: ]
Second things: if you're injured or sick, talk to Medical. If you eat people or have other special needs, talk to Xenogen. If you need cigarettes, go beg Agriculture for work. [ He's reading all these ifs off a list, rote and sing-song, but now that he's reached the last bullet point he looks up and smiles, sort of. Still tired-looking. ] If you ignored all the graffiti warnings about living above the tenth floor, please note that in the event of an emergency, no one will be there to help you.
Any other questions or concerns, ask here or come by the Support office, and we'll do what we can. [ He's already moving to shut off the feed, but he pauses long enough to add, ] I know it's a lot, but it'll be all right.
[ ATTACHMENT: ]
THE RUNDOWN » What happened, where you are, what to do.
SUPPORT DEPARTMENT INFO » Who we are and what we do.
REFERENCE* » Basic facts about the ship and solar system.
A TIMELINE OF EVENTS » This will take time to read thoroughly, but we strongly recommend it.
FAQ » Please read this before asking a question on the network.
SPACE TRAINING » If this is your first time aboard a space ship, please watch these helpful videos.
LOOKING FOR WORK? » If you have any questions about the departments, track down a chief officer or someone who operates within it about recruitment.
COMPLAINT BOX » Need to get something off your chest? Bring it here. We might just be able to do something about it.
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Lawyers.
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I wouldn't know. Wizards don't have lawyers.
[ Or any due process requirements apparently. You can ask Sirius all about it. ]
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Trust me, they're the most ravenous of any beast I know.
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Except the lawyers, maybe. We can let Mr Pendleton decide what to do with them.
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( She'd been in there once for both her safety and others. What about people who were stronger - who were more than human? Was it good enough to hold them? )
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How effective is the help that is given to them? Someone would have to be experienced to be able to help.
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The fact that few people on board have taken any bites out of everyone else is a good sign, I'd say.
If you want to know anyone's particular qualifications, you'd best go to the source.
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But I'll do that. Thank you.