♌ arsenicCatnip (Nepeta Leijon) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
purrfectlycute) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
ataraxion2012-03-07 12:34 am
purrfectlycute) wrote in ataraxion2012-03-07 12:34 am
( 001 ) text;
:33 < so um
:33 < best get the bad stuff out of the way, i guess
:33 < ive recently learned that people disappurr quite suddenly on the ship
:33 < several of my furriends have been among them
:33 < at furst it was pretty distressing, but it kinda makes sense in an abstract timey wimey way
:33 < assuming events continue from our points in time, weve gotta get back to our own universes SOMEHOW
:33 < provided our entry into this universe doesnt mean we got thrown into some paradoxical mess
:33 < then again we arent in the game as fur as i know???
:33 < bluhhhhh
:33 < the more i think about it the more confusing it gets!
:33 < anyway, i find it much better to think about the story that *could be* instead of going around in circles with faulty logic
:33 < since i didnt have anything to paint with, i decided to write a story about it instead!
:33 < sure beat the heck outta moping around my room all the time
:33 < i WAS gonna call it "scenario #1" buuuuut now i think ive got a better title!
The Great Catsby
In a galaxy far far away, a big shiny ship called the Tranquility drifted through the vast expanse of space, leaving little ripples of comets and stars in its wake. The passengers on this ship weren't exactly normal in the conventional sense; this wasn't necessarily denoted by their species, but by the circumstances they had arrived onto the ship. Trolls, humans, Time Lords, budgiebutts, and many more had been removed from their own universes to be placed in a new one. These people had traversed time, space, bypassed all the impossibilities of reality's restrictions only to be jammed into gross liquid containers without their knowledge.
(It's not an unfamiliar story to most readers, I'd imagine!)
On this ship there were several trolls. No, not the bizarre kind you'd find on Asgard, but the Alternian variety. Two of them were named Gamzee and Kanaya. Both of them had experiencedunfurrtunate unfortunate circumstances within the confines of their own universe. Tranquility may have proven to be a fresh start… had they not mysteriously vanished.
What happened to them? The logical conclusion would be to implicate Jack Noir, also known as Dogface, Murdermachine, and Destroyer of Worlds. It would be easy to assume that they were stabbed to death, yet it was not in Dogface's nature to hide bodies, let alone crime scenes. Clearly he was up to something else. Something nefarious. Something that would take skill and expertise to get to the bottom of the mystery.
It was a case that could only be solved by the likes of Ms. Nepeta Leijon and Mr. Sherock Holmes!
The dashing duo knew they couldn't simply go about the investigation as themselves. Luckily the clever pair had a knack for disguising themselves in various roles. While Nepeta normally favored her beloved cat character, and though Mr. Holmes had a certain affinity for the demure and coy nature of a woman (an explanation that baffles the author of this scenario, quite frankly), the two chose a much simpler role:
The two roleplayed as a cunning pair of Sleuths! It was a flawless plan and Dogface didn't see it coming for a second.
The two scoured all the evidence in the ship, inspecting it under magnifying glasses, smoking pipes, wearing funny hats, basically everything you'd expect of a respectable detective. The pair followed Dogface down the winding, endless corridors of the Tranquility. The shiny walls seemed to disintegrate into stone as they travelled further along until the point where it looked like they were descending into a dungeon.
"Don't worry, Detective Sleuth," the other detective, known far and wide as the Great Catsby, whispered. "I've slayed quite a few dungeon-dwelling dragons in my day. If you've seen one dungeon, you've seen them all. Just follow me."
Because everyone knows in order to be an ace detective, you have to have at LEAST one victorious battle against a dragon under your belt. Without it, you're merely an inquisitive person with a funny hat.
Detective Sleuth nodded, putting full confidence in his female companion. She led them to Dogface's diabolical lair. No dragons presided in the dreary cavern. No, what they found was much, much worse.
In the center of the pool was a huge pool of water, over which dangled all of the missing passengers! Kanaya, The Doctor, Rose, everyone was chained together and were slowly being lowered into the shark-infested waters. Oh, but these weren't normal sharks, they were inter-dimensions SHARKTAPUSES that didn't just feed off flesh, but off the passengers' very existences! To be eaten by one of these sharktapuses would result in the immediate erasure of that person in every time line and every reality, leaving nothing but the hollow echo of memories for their friends to remember them by. Those too, sadly, would fade with time.
Controlling the lever lowering the passengers into the pool was none other than Mr. Noir!
"So he's decided to get creative with his killing methods, eh? He's no longer satisfied with senseless slaughter; he has to murder every aspect of these peoples' very existences!" hissed the appropriately enraged Detective Sleuth.
Unfortunately he didn't realize that Dogface had freakish hearing and teleportation powers. Before the Great Catsby could warn him, Dogface teleported behind them.
"That's right," a diabolical doggy voice growled behind them. "But that doesn't mean I don't still enjoy the stabbing part!"
Detective Sleuth uttered a cry of pain as his arm was sliced clean off. Noir went in for another slice, but having learned a trick or two from her fearless leader, Great Catsby managed to grab Detective Sleuth and roll out of the way. Noir was fast though--she had barely a moment to look up before she felt a sharp pain sink into her side. She did her best to defend Detective Sleuth, who was by then bleeding profusely on the dungeon floor, but her swipes only scratched the surface of Dogface the Hellbeast's terrible hide. Green blood splattered the ground and her vision began to grow black…
…until she heard a familiar valiant voice shout, "HEY FUCKASS!"
She pushed through the haze of pain and looked up to see none other than her fearless leader, Karkat! Once again he was at the head of an unstoppable force: Thor, America, Tavros (with shiny new robo legs!) and John all stood at his back.
Noir didn't stand a chance. He tried to teleport away but was only met by the blows of Thor's hammer, shot down by America's gun, and just when he thought he could get a slice in, John punched him right in the face with his hammer AND his fists. Tavros, making sure to keep an eye on the reckless America to make sure he didn't get himself into too much trouble, quickly made his way over to maneuver the other passengers to safety.
Dogface was reduced to kneeling on the ground, rasping for breath as his visage flickered in his last desperate attempts to get away. He looked up into the steely eyes of Karkat Vantas.
"This isn't over," Dogfaced snarled.
"Oh, but it is. This story will end as all stories should," Karkat said coolly. He snapped his figures, signaling America's final move. The country-man lifted his arm and shot Noir squarely in the head, blasting Dogface's body right into the pool. Noir was dead in a pool. The Tranquility could finally resume being tranquil.
The Great Catsby shed her disguise and once again became Nepeta Leijon. More than anything she wanted to pounce on Karkat--she was so pleased to see him again and so grateful that he'd saved the day! But, cool and aloof as always, the troll leader simply raised a hand.
"Don't worry, Nep. I'll get all these guys home where they belong. I can only take so many people at a time, but I'll come back for everyone. I'll come back for you."
Her eyes filled with tears. Of course she understood; he'd figured out a way to safely get through time and space, but even that afforded its own limitations. However heartbroken, she didn't doubt his promise. She nodded and allowed him to take the previously-in-peril passengers back to where they belonged.
Then another thought occurred to her. "Oh! Mr. Holmes!"
When she turned around his arm had already been replaced by a robotic arm, which gave her a thumbs up. He seemed perplexed by this gesture, but he nevertheless was fascinated by the opportunity to learn more about robotics. Good thing the ship had a spare arm lying around!
This is where the characters would normally all live happily ever after. That wasn't precisely the case. That is not to say their lives would not be happy, nor does it mean that that their journeys would lead to their own happy ending. They simply had a much longer road ahead of them, one that they would all face bravely, knowing that together, they could triumph over anything.
:33 < (im much more inclined to drawing, but i hope you enjoyed the story nonetheless! h33h33!)
:33 < best get the bad stuff out of the way, i guess
:33 < ive recently learned that people disappurr quite suddenly on the ship
:33 < several of my furriends have been among them
:33 < at furst it was pretty distressing, but it kinda makes sense in an abstract timey wimey way
:33 < assuming events continue from our points in time, weve gotta get back to our own universes SOMEHOW
:33 < provided our entry into this universe doesnt mean we got thrown into some paradoxical mess
:33 < then again we arent in the game as fur as i know???
:33 < bluhhhhh
:33 < the more i think about it the more confusing it gets!
:33 < anyway, i find it much better to think about the story that *could be* instead of going around in circles with faulty logic
:33 < since i didnt have anything to paint with, i decided to write a story about it instead!
:33 < sure beat the heck outta moping around my room all the time
:33 < i WAS gonna call it "scenario #1" buuuuut now i think ive got a better title!
In a galaxy far far away, a big shiny ship called the Tranquility drifted through the vast expanse of space, leaving little ripples of comets and stars in its wake. The passengers on this ship weren't exactly normal in the conventional sense; this wasn't necessarily denoted by their species, but by the circumstances they had arrived onto the ship. Trolls, humans, Time Lords, budgiebutts, and many more had been removed from their own universes to be placed in a new one. These people had traversed time, space, bypassed all the impossibilities of reality's restrictions only to be jammed into gross liquid containers without their knowledge.
(It's not an unfamiliar story to most readers, I'd imagine!)
On this ship there were several trolls. No, not the bizarre kind you'd find on Asgard, but the Alternian variety. Two of them were named Gamzee and Kanaya. Both of them had experienced
What happened to them? The logical conclusion would be to implicate Jack Noir, also known as Dogface, Murdermachine, and Destroyer of Worlds. It would be easy to assume that they were stabbed to death, yet it was not in Dogface's nature to hide bodies, let alone crime scenes. Clearly he was up to something else. Something nefarious. Something that would take skill and expertise to get to the bottom of the mystery.
It was a case that could only be solved by the likes of Ms. Nepeta Leijon and Mr. Sherock Holmes!
The dashing duo knew they couldn't simply go about the investigation as themselves. Luckily the clever pair had a knack for disguising themselves in various roles. While Nepeta normally favored her beloved cat character, and though Mr. Holmes had a certain affinity for the demure and coy nature of a woman (an explanation that baffles the author of this scenario, quite frankly), the two chose a much simpler role:
The two roleplayed as a cunning pair of Sleuths! It was a flawless plan and Dogface didn't see it coming for a second.
The two scoured all the evidence in the ship, inspecting it under magnifying glasses, smoking pipes, wearing funny hats, basically everything you'd expect of a respectable detective. The pair followed Dogface down the winding, endless corridors of the Tranquility. The shiny walls seemed to disintegrate into stone as they travelled further along until the point where it looked like they were descending into a dungeon.
"Don't worry, Detective Sleuth," the other detective, known far and wide as the Great Catsby, whispered. "I've slayed quite a few dungeon-dwelling dragons in my day. If you've seen one dungeon, you've seen them all. Just follow me."
Because everyone knows in order to be an ace detective, you have to have at LEAST one victorious battle against a dragon under your belt. Without it, you're merely an inquisitive person with a funny hat.
Detective Sleuth nodded, putting full confidence in his female companion. She led them to Dogface's diabolical lair. No dragons presided in the dreary cavern. No, what they found was much, much worse.
In the center of the pool was a huge pool of water, over which dangled all of the missing passengers! Kanaya, The Doctor, Rose, everyone was chained together and were slowly being lowered into the shark-infested waters. Oh, but these weren't normal sharks, they were inter-dimensions SHARKTAPUSES that didn't just feed off flesh, but off the passengers' very existences! To be eaten by one of these sharktapuses would result in the immediate erasure of that person in every time line and every reality, leaving nothing but the hollow echo of memories for their friends to remember them by. Those too, sadly, would fade with time.
Controlling the lever lowering the passengers into the pool was none other than Mr. Noir!
"So he's decided to get creative with his killing methods, eh? He's no longer satisfied with senseless slaughter; he has to murder every aspect of these peoples' very existences!" hissed the appropriately enraged Detective Sleuth.
Unfortunately he didn't realize that Dogface had freakish hearing and teleportation powers. Before the Great Catsby could warn him, Dogface teleported behind them.
"That's right," a diabolical doggy voice growled behind them. "But that doesn't mean I don't still enjoy the stabbing part!"
Detective Sleuth uttered a cry of pain as his arm was sliced clean off. Noir went in for another slice, but having learned a trick or two from her fearless leader, Great Catsby managed to grab Detective Sleuth and roll out of the way. Noir was fast though--she had barely a moment to look up before she felt a sharp pain sink into her side. She did her best to defend Detective Sleuth, who was by then bleeding profusely on the dungeon floor, but her swipes only scratched the surface of Dogface the Hellbeast's terrible hide. Green blood splattered the ground and her vision began to grow black…
…until she heard a familiar valiant voice shout, "HEY FUCKASS!"
She pushed through the haze of pain and looked up to see none other than her fearless leader, Karkat! Once again he was at the head of an unstoppable force: Thor, America, Tavros (with shiny new robo legs!) and John all stood at his back.
Noir didn't stand a chance. He tried to teleport away but was only met by the blows of Thor's hammer, shot down by America's gun, and just when he thought he could get a slice in, John punched him right in the face with his hammer AND his fists. Tavros, making sure to keep an eye on the reckless America to make sure he didn't get himself into too much trouble, quickly made his way over to maneuver the other passengers to safety.
Dogface was reduced to kneeling on the ground, rasping for breath as his visage flickered in his last desperate attempts to get away. He looked up into the steely eyes of Karkat Vantas.
"This isn't over," Dogfaced snarled.
"Oh, but it is. This story will end as all stories should," Karkat said coolly. He snapped his figures, signaling America's final move. The country-man lifted his arm and shot Noir squarely in the head, blasting Dogface's body right into the pool. Noir was dead in a pool. The Tranquility could finally resume being tranquil.
The Great Catsby shed her disguise and once again became Nepeta Leijon. More than anything she wanted to pounce on Karkat--she was so pleased to see him again and so grateful that he'd saved the day! But, cool and aloof as always, the troll leader simply raised a hand.
"Don't worry, Nep. I'll get all these guys home where they belong. I can only take so many people at a time, but I'll come back for everyone. I'll come back for you."
Her eyes filled with tears. Of course she understood; he'd figured out a way to safely get through time and space, but even that afforded its own limitations. However heartbroken, she didn't doubt his promise. She nodded and allowed him to take the previously-in-peril passengers back to where they belonged.
Then another thought occurred to her. "Oh! Mr. Holmes!"
When she turned around his arm had already been replaced by a robotic arm, which gave her a thumbs up. He seemed perplexed by this gesture, but he nevertheless was fascinated by the opportunity to learn more about robotics. Good thing the ship had a spare arm lying around!
This is where the characters would normally all live happily ever after. That wasn't precisely the case. That is not to say their lives would not be happy, nor does it mean that that their journeys would lead to their own happy ending. They simply had a much longer road ahead of them, one that they would all face bravely, knowing that together, they could triumph over anything.
:33 < (im much more inclined to drawing, but i hope you enjoyed the story nonetheless! h33h33!)
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Now that sounds like true furiendship. I gotta say, your pals are lucky to have you. And not just belcaws of your mad hammer-wielding skills, heehee!
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I am lucky to have them as well—more so, perhaps than the other way around. [ truth. he fucks their shit up all the time, yet they stick by his side. ]
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I'd say the luck is pretty equal in both directions, heehee!