002 | text

[scratched]

a/s/t

refresher course for anyone whos forgotten the drill
a = age duh
s = species
t = time
when youre from the year day hour minute the whole shebang
in fact you can forget the other things that last one is the only one i actually give the remotest shit about
my single shit is a star millions of light years away and if you squint through the hubble or something you might catch its distant twinkle
but thats it
dont actually answer the rest of it i really dont care if youre a middle aged phosphorescent insurance salesman from mars just give me the digits
and if you got the lowdown on the timeline in this hellhole cough it up now

ps
whichever one of you assholes put baby got back on my thing
put it back
thats my jam

pps
need a suit
its for work

also a ps
john pick your shit up off the floor or im throwing it outside this isnt a goddamn zoo


[also text permissions can be found here!]

Comments

[zoosmell]

um, wow, dave!
your stuff takes up way more space on the floor!
i do not want to know what i stepped in today.

[scratched]

the difference is my stuff is actually useful
yours is just crap

[zoosmell]

you wish!
my stuff is awesome and if you don't clean up, i will be tossing YOUR stuff out of the room.
take that, kazing!
anyway, i do not have a suit, but i got back some stuff and i guess you can borrow it?
what work are you even talking about?

[last_centurion]

Do you really think that's just a pressing concern considering we're all stuck here?

[scratched]

you dont think that maybe knowing when the fuck we are at this very moment is important
like possibly it could be useful to know what the hell happened before all this zapping everyone and their bro into outer space bullshit went down
or how we dont even know what fucking day it is on this floating metal mental ward

but hey what the fuck do i know about time

[scratched]

dude all you have to do is shove it under the bed or put it on the bed or just anywhere but the floor so a dude can just walk in here without putting his feet all over your nasty trash
ive got work
important work

YOU DIDN'T SEE THAT!

[last_centurion]

[SO MUCH NOSE PINCHING]

There IS a Time Lord on board as well as two crew members. I'm far more concerned with where we're going.

[zoosmell]

whatever, dave.
just clean up your own crap and i will shove mine under the bed.
is your work a time work kinda thing?
is that why you're asking everyone about their time?

its our secret

[scratched]

well praise jesus the time lord is here everyone climb in the delorean were going home
i call shotgun

oh wait hes just as stuck as the rest of us chumpaholics

maybe if you knew where this things been in the past you could make a better guess where its headed
but like i said i dont know shit about time

[scratched]

nope my side is clean

nah
messages signals connecting channels shit like that
but you know this is all about appearance dude
cant be underdressed to take care of all that button pressing

[zoosmell]

oh, ok, officer strider sir.
mr officer strider sir!
you can use my stuff but don't get your gross slobber all over it!
if you want, i guess.
i don't think i'd notice or anything...
anyway, i should fill out your dumb thing too, hold on.

[zoosmell]

my age is fifty galatical light years old!
and my species are the blarrgghhlers, and we live a peaceful life filled with parties every single day.
and the time is 45566 million years abc which stands for a weird alien lingo that you won't be able to understand because we are way too cool for you.

\o/

[last_centurion]

Delo--You know what, never mind.

Now, do you want the year we were born, year we died, year we were resurrected, or the last year it was before we were brought here?

[audio]

[testgasm]

Did you tell John we're getting married, or something? Because he seems to be under the impression that we are. And...if you did, I am declaring it the last straw. The--the final one. I mean it. I am...I am completely serious, now. You are all out of straws.

[scratched]

not even gonna grace that steaming load with a response
itll only encourage you

[scratched]

the one where you ignore everything i wrote and tell me your life story as slowly and excruciatingly detailed as possible

[zoosmell]

i guess you are just not cool enough to enter into the cool alien world.
why do you want to know about the time, anyway?
i thought you already knew...
since you were the one who told me.
and i believe you because you say a lot of shit but that was not shit!

[audio]

[scratched]

Yeah, he's gonna be my Maid of Honor, and is it cool if my sister doesn't sit at our table at the reception, she can be a real harpy once she starts that psychobabble.

[last_centurion]

1988
2020
102
1941

Better?

[tenthousandyears]

1936

. . .What kind of suit?

text;

[entrapments]

you writing a book or something?

[testgasm]

Okay, well, it's not happening. I'm calling it off. Even if it was on in the first place, which it wasn't. Still called off.

Who's your sister? [avoid ALL the Striders]

text;

[mistercocks]

you're REALLY trying this again? do you keep an updated diary on where everybody's from? or when i guess since you specified

[voice]

[functioningperfectly]

[did you think you were ever going to get rid of hal dave
really

but for you he'll try to at least be coy since he knows you like that
dave]

I don't think Martians need insurance, Dave.

As to your actual question, it was 2010.

[text] replying to the right spot now

[daughteroflight]

[ DG doesn't like Dave's tone or your font choice (what is this, Geocities?), so she'll answer whatever the hell she likes. especially if it annoys him. ]

22. human. 2007.

Does that unlock some mysteries for you?