video;

[2leftfeet]

[It doesn't take Shepard long to take to the network. Closed ship communication isn't exactly a new concept to her and while there's a whole lot of questions that spring to her mind, she's eager to get one thing sorted out first.]

To whoever thought it was a good idea to break into my locker and take all my things: it wasn't.

[The woman on the video feed, wearing an ill-fitting borrowed sweater, may have a cheerful edge to her voice but it's clearly a front - belied by her furrowed brow and how her mouth falls into a sharp, severe line between words. As soon as Shepard had realized that everyone else seemed to have things left to them in their lockers while hers had been suspiciously empty of pretty much anything beyond her comm device, she'd jumped to the only logical conclusion: someone had stolen her shit.]

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume it was an accident. If you have my armor or tags or anything with the name Shepard on it-- [She doesn't even know what else could've been there, but there had to have been something.] --just put it back where you found it by 1300 hours and we'll call it even.

[See? Perfectly reasonable of her. None of this makes any sense to her, but let no one say that Commander Shepard of the Normandy can't roll with the punches and put on a nice face despite it all.]

If I find you with it after that, I'll throw you out the nearest airlock.

[Or not. After a moment she continues, only slightly awkwardly. Man can't survive on threats and false accusations alone after all.] As a side note: if anyone has a spare change of clothes they'd be willing to part with, let me know.

Comments

enjoy your call from the next room:

[chickenselects]

You asked about shoes, right? [Because these boots are as confusing as the rest of what he has to wear.] I wasn't paying attention, I'm trying to learn how to pick up this ball with five...fingers.

she's just going to ask about strapping him to a skateboard

[2leftfeet]

[No, but she'll make a point of doing it. Though seriously Garrus - learning to your shoe laces is an important life skill. You definitely need to get that down.]

A ball? Where'd you find a ball?

Shepard please, that helps no one. He's just going to crash.

[chickenselects]

[Uh.] The floor?

slow facepalm like 2001: a space odyssey slow

[2leftfeet]

[Okay. Sure. 'The floor.']

This place is dangerous. Maybe you shouldn't just pick up things you find laying around. [Attack of the killer rubber ball. She's assuming it's rubber. Anyway, right:] Is the shoe thing more a laces thing?

video;

[suddenlycaptain]

Shepard, huh?

[ Headtilt. ]

You don't look like the last two. But welcome back anyway.

video;

[2leftfeet]

[The reply isn't instantaneous, but it does come. There's something cool and clipped about how she asks:]

What do you mean by 'the last two'?

video;

[suddenlycaptain]

A Commander Shepherd of the Normandy has been here at least twice before now.

It happens, unfortunately. This ship takes people out of different times as well as universes, and it's entirely possible that the other two were alternate universe versions of... you.

[ Pause. ]

I have some clothes looted off the last space station that tried to kill us, too.

[leaps]

I've got some spares.

[ because saying you're back is always awkward. ]

[2leftfeet]

[Thanks for that; she's had enough surprises to do her for a while.]

I'd appreciate it. Where can I pick them up?

[Now here's to hoping they're somewhere close to fitting.]

[leaps]

How well do you know the ship?

[ everyone else can surprise her, sulu's just here to be vaguely helpful ok ]

voice;

[makedo]

Armor or tags? [ and then the name... brad's going to venture a wild guess here, based on the last shepard on this ship ] Marine?

voice;

[2leftfeet]

[It's a good guess.]

That's right. Systems Alliance Military. [She's not sure that means anything here. A beat, then:] You?

voice;

[makedo]

[ yeah, that didn't mean anything at all to him, but marine is marine. that's worth something. ]

United States Marine Corps, 1st Recon.

Video

[acapriciousthing]

I don't need my ship jumpsuit.

[Funny thing about willing your clothing into existence]

video;

[2leftfeet]

How tall are you?

[Beggars can't be choosers but if she's shoving herself into a one piece jumpsuit, that seems like an important distinction to make.]

Re: video;

[acapriciousthing]

That's... actually a bit complicated.

[However tall she wants to be]

The clothes are for someone who's about 5'6" though.

voice; hi

[passe]

[ the audio's a bit muffled, like it's on a bad speaker phone. that or the person using it doesn't know how to use speaker phone very well. probably both. ]

We don't throw people out of airlocks here. We shoot them.

[ a pause, and then, sounding slightly petty: ] Or tie them to chairs.

voice; why hello there

[2leftfeet]

Oh, well if you want to do it the messy way-- [Spoken as if that's the only drawback when it comes to putting projectiles into someone.]

Who got tied to a chair? [Because that's kind of a weird form of corporal punishment. Though honestly, what here isn't weird?]

voice; hi stid just started. stid looks like a vd.

[passe]

[ hal's not expecting that. most people here tend get pretty fussy at the mention of killing, but he supposes she did open with an airlock threat. ]

I did. It's unrelated.

[ said like that also makes it irrelevant, so moving on. ]

This ship isn't real.

text.

[look]

You know, now if anyone goes missing, you're gonna be a suspect.

text;

[2leftfeet]

And I'm very concerned about that.

[Ha ha ha.]

text;

[look]

Not much in the way of laws or courts here, so personally, I'd find some concern.

text;

[doggedly]

but your things are such nice things how can we possibly give them up

text;

[2leftfeet]

I get the impression theres a lot of places to drop a body on this ship.

put my gear back where you got it.

text;

[doggedly]

very violent and accusatory straight from the off
and demanding
usually people offer compensation

and before you say our compensation is not having our bodies dropped somewhere on the ship let me tell you that doesnt count

you dont just drop bodies here by the way