[video] 002; What the hell kind of devil bird chirps at night?

[zoosmell]

[ The video starts, with the above slammed into the screen. And then, the paper relents and moves back to show that familiar loser kid. ]

Hi, I am looking for a really good person to be a best friend for my good friend, orange Dave! He's an asshole but he's pretty nice, and he has lots of friends like me and Rose and Jade, but one of his bestest friends died a long time ago, and it is really hard to be good enough. So I am taking applications for a new best friend for him. Rose and Jade don't have to apply, but you can if you want! And the rest of you can go meet him yourself later, but he's really nice.

[ And it switches to text. ]

<b>1. Are you awesome?</b> <b>2. Are you a nice person?</b> <b>3. What are your thoughts about cake?</b> <b>4. Nick Cage is awesome.</b> <b>5. Why are you good enough to be friends with him?</b> <b>6. Are you going to play awesome pranks on him?</b> <b>7. And pretend to piss in his apple juice?</b> <b>8. I don't really know why I'm doing this.</b> <b>9. But he's a really good friend, so I hope you take care of him.</b>