[text] eridan's guide to basically encouraging people to go wandering around in the dark

[uncodlyawwesome]

just a general notice a fuckin importance
dont go wwanderin around in the fuckin dark
or pseudo dark i guess
just because you think it might be fun or somethin

seriously if you go wwanderin around an shit youre probably gonna die an get yourself eaten by fuckin monsters or somethin
some a you wwerent around wwhen there wwere monsters runnin rampant dowwn in the science department but those wwere a thing so wwho knowws wwhat else might be wwanderin around wwaitin to fuckin maul you

or you knoww just general fuckin bullshit like you might fall ovver a railin or hurt yourself in some other mundane fuckin wway wwhich wwould suck evven more just because that's fuckin lame



this goes fuckin triple for you people
you knoww wwho you are

[he means his friends. ....and fef. mostly fef. let's not lie.]

Comments

text;

[fronds]

Soooo, w)(at you're saying is...
I s)(ould most definitely go wandering around alone in t)(e dark wit)(out telling anyone??? 38)
O)( s)(ell, I can't do a winkyface wit)( my goggles.

text;

[uncodlyawwesome]

for the fuckin empress a all trolls evver you are pretty fuckin blase about all my wwell intentioned fuckin wwarnins fef

text;

[fronds]

I'm JOKING, dummy! I t)(ink it is very nice of you to warn everyone, and I'm not about to )(ang myself out on a line.
-Everyone is just being so gloomy about t)(is w)(ole t)(ing, so I'm trying to liven it up around )(ere wit)( a little bit of friendly ribbing!

text;

[uncodlyawwesome]

ok one i knoww youre jokin you wwouldnt go wwanderin around youre not stupid
but twwo its kind a fuckin bad wwhats goin on so a lil bit a solemnity wwouldnt be fuckin amiss

text;

[fronds]

38(
T)(ere, is t)(at enoug)(?? I'm pretty sure t)(at t)(e ot)(ers )(ave t)(e solemnity covered, so I can keep sailing )(ICS C)(eerful!

[ "her imperious condescension's ship", of course. fun with alien ship prefixes! ]

I maintain wit)( confidence t)(at we're all going to be ok.
So everyone w)(o needs to be solemn can just keep being solemn, but I'm going to keep glubbing for everyone -ELS--E to keep t)(eir spirits up!!!

text;

[uncodlyawwesome]

i guess thats your thing an i cant really stop you but dont let your persistent an obnoxious cheerfulness get you into hot wwater okay
the last thing i wwant to do right noww is havve to savve you from some kind a monster or something

i mean i wwould
but id be morally obligated to tell you i fuckin told you so

text|

[entrapments]

i take it that means you're safely in the gardens?

text|

[uncodlyawwesome]

fuck no im keepin an eye out in the corridors
not like wwanderin aimlessly just makin sure nothin starts comin right for evveryone huddled around actin like this is that fuckin cold an shit

text|

[entrapments]

and standing around alone in these creepy abandoned corridors is a way better idea because....?

text|

[uncodlyawwesome]

because i knoww wwhat to look for

text|

[entrapments]

which would be.....?

voice;

[handelaar]

If they're dumb enough to wander off on their own, they deserve t'get eaten.

[So he came into this wanting to piss Eridan off (grudge what grudge) but. That's actually how he feels. Welp. Gold star for you, alien-kiddo.]

voice;

[uncodlyawwesome]

Wwell, fuckin' obvviously, but noww nobody can say nobody wwarned 'em.

permavoice for I am lazy

[handelaar]

Why the hell do ya need to warn 'em.

[uncodlyawwesome]

Because I'm part'a security an' nobody else has yet?

[handelaar]

You're ten, or somethin'.

[uncodlyawwesome]

No I'm not, I'm six. But wwhat does that havve to do wwith anythin'?

[handelaar]

You're - [You know, he's just going to drop that because one, what and two, pissing off Eridan.]

Who's gonna listen?

[uncodlyawwesome]

I dunno, anyone wwho didn't already knoww this wwas a thing to be awware of, I guess.

[handelaar]

[Well damn.

That moment he switches over to business.]

Agriculture can announce it to people down here.

[aimlessness]

what if they don't know who they are?
being vague never helped anyone.

[uncodlyawwesome]

let me help you out
youre not one a them

[aimlessness]

wow.
give me a minute to recover from the disappointment.

[uncodlyawwesome]

ok you got your minute
the fact is that people wwho im callin on specifically are people i talk to a bunch i guess youd call them friends or somethin wwhatevver
either wway theyre the ones im sayin that to
if they dont knoww im talkin to them then theyre too dumb to be my friends

[aimlessness]

heartwarming.
get them down to the garden, if you can.
though i'm figuring you already knew that, what with the psa.

Voice

[deprecate]

Oh, fantastic advice, really brilliant, never would have guessed that on my own. Cheers, Professor Plum.

Voice

[uncodlyawwesome]

Wwoww, human sarcasm is so fuckin' graceful an' subtle, I can't fuckin' believve it.

Voice

[deprecate]

Subtle? You're the one goin' around stating the fucking obvious.

Voice

[uncodlyawwesome]

In case you havven't noticed, wwe havve people aboard wwho wwouldn't knoww the obvvious if it wwas a physical entity an' not just an abstract concept.

Voice

[deprecate]

So you've appointed yourself a one man safety committee? D'you make yourself a badge as well?

Voice

[uncodlyawwesome]

More like I'm part'a security, so this is somethin' I'm actually allowwed to do. Are you gonna keep givvin' me shit for doin' somethin' that's generally helpful, or are you gonna lay off the fuckin' sarcasm an' learn howw to pull that bowwsprit outta the gapin orifice'a your preference an' let me get on wwith wwarnin' oblivvious people about the fuckin' obvvious?

Voice

[deprecate]

Pull the what out of my where? Couldn't understand you through all the double-yous.

Voice

[uncodlyawwesome]

You're a real fuckin' jackass. Do you havve a problem wwith my accent?

Voice

[deprecate]

Ain't like to any accent I've ever heard before.

[ Says the guy who's so Northern Irish he's sometimes unintelligible. ]

text;

[constructum]

You okay, Eridan?
Where are you?

text;

[uncodlyawwesome]

im fine obvviously otherwwise i wwouldnt be makin dumb text posts
im near the garden im just keepin an eye on the hallwways
wwho knowws they might start goin endless again or somethin so someones gotta keep an eye out

text;

[constructum]

You know what I mean.
I'm already assuming you're in one piece.