TEXT ;

[cons]

WHY IS THERE A MONSTER TURKEY VULTURE TRYING TO ATTACK ME FOR GOING INTO MY OWN ROOM HOLY SHIT NO SOMEBODY PLEASE COME CLAIM THEIR HIDEOUS PET BEFORE I SHOOT IT

THANKS




[ ooc: she's in talk-to-text mode. or... text to talk.. whatever. she's yelling at her communicator and it's translating it to text, right. ]

Comments

» audio

[thenormalsquint]

Oh shit, space turkeys?

permatext :B

[cons]

JUST YOUR RUN OF THE MILL FARM TURKEY I THINK

ONLY REALLY ANGRY

permavoice on her part while i am dying of lols

[thenormalsquint]

Okay, so a regular turkey? [Sigh of relief.] Don't do that. You had me thinking it was some mutant turkey bent on revenge for its Thanksgiving brethren.

[cons]

HA HA HA THAT'D BE SO MESSED UP THOUGH THINK ABOUT IT

WE HAVEN'T EVEN HAD THANKSGIVING HERE. AND HALF OF THE SHIP PROBABLY HASN'T EVEN HEARD OF IT. FUCKIN CRAZY TURKEY.

[thenormalsquint]

Well, if it was Edgeworth's birthday the other day and that means it's September, then whoever owns that turkey better watch out in a couple months if we don't have anything worthwhile to make dinner in cans.

[cons]

I DON'T THINK HE'LL EVEN MAKE IT ANOTHER TWO MONTHS IF HE KEEPS RUNNING AROUND THE SHIP WITH THIS SHITTY ATTITUDE.

[thenormalsquint]

Maybe you scared the poor guy. You are yelling. At least in text.

[cons]

I'M ACTUALLY JUST HOLDING MY DEVICE REALLY CLOSE TO MY MOUTH SO I DON'T HAVE TO TALK TOO LOUD BECAUSE OF THAT EXACT REASON. I'M NOT SHOUTING I SWEAR IT'S ACTUALLY MORE OF A SHAKEN WHIMPER, TO BE PERFECTLY HONEST.

I'VE BEEN STANDING IN THIS SAME SPOT FOR THE LAST FIFTEEN MINUTES BECAUSE HE JUST KEEPS PACING IN FRONT OF MY DOOR LIKE HE'S GUARDING THE DAMN THING. UGH UGH UGH.

[thenormalsquint]

Have you tried talking nicely to him?

[cons]

I CAN'T SPEAK FRENCH

OKAY THAT TIME I YELLED BUT OH OKAY WAIT

[ shuffleshuffle sliding along the hallway ]

ARIADNE ALREADY SUGGESTED I TRY TALKING NICELY TO IT AND I EXPLAINED THAT IT ISN'T OPEN TO DISCUSSION

BECAUSE IT'S A TURKEY.

[thenormalsquint]

I can speak French. Do you want me to speak French to it?

[Since when do turkeys speak French? Sacré bleu!]

It's a turkey. It's probably more scared of you than you are of it.

[cons]

NO WHAT IT DOESN'T SPEAK FRENCH EITHER IT DOESN'T SPEAK ANYTHING

I THINK YOU UNDERESTIMATE THE AMOUNT OF RAGE THIS TURKEY HAS

[thenormalsquint]

What exactly did you do to piss it off?

[cons]

I TRIED TO WALK INTO MY ROOM. LIKE THAT'S IT I SWEAR. IT'S ALL TERRITORIAL AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHY.

[thenormalsquint]

Somebody has to have a tranquilizer on this ship. Or be really great with birds. The poultry whisperer.

[cons]

TRANQUILIZER IS THE BEST OPTION THERE

I WONDER IF MEDBAY HAS ANYTHING