text | your halo slipping down to choke you now

[kicktomorrow]

[Jane had to do it sooner or later. It's embarrassing, yeah, but everyone will know sooner or later, living on top of each other like this.]

Hey, ship.

I need a sponsor. Like an NA sponsor. Or AA, I'm not picky. Anyone who's up for helping someone get through the 12 steps. If you have any experience--or don't, you're just interested--I'll tell you more.

Also, where can someone find a decent conditioner around here? Please tell me I don't have to keep using the one in the showers. It's giving me split ends.

Comments

video;

[lacksgrace]

Twelve steps for what? [ A pause. ] Why not just one? Or none at all?

permatext

[kicktomorrow]

[Great. Already someone who doesn't get it. She lights a cigarette.]

It's a program for recovering from drug addiction. The twelve steps are how you work through it.

permavideo

[lacksgrace]

[ What's with everyone and the text function around here? He seriously hates reading everything. A frown. ]

Why would you want to do something like that?

[kicktomorrow]

The program or quitting?

[lacksgrace]

Both, I guess. Doesn't really seem all that promising to me.

Voice

[skindeep]

I like to think I'm pretty good with moral support. Could even write you a cheer, if that's what you need.

[But hopefully you don't.]

voice

[kicktomorrow]

[She switches to audio. This guy seems okay enough.]

Thanks, but that's not exactly what I need. And what are you, a cheerleader?

voice

[skindeep]

Not exactly, no. They said I didn't have the legs for the uniform.

So what do you need? Tell me.

voice

[kicktomorrow]

I need another addict.

[Jesse and Lisbeth can't sponsor her, she knows that. They're too close to the problem--to her.]

Or even just someone who knows the program. I left my Big Book in another universe. I probably have half of it memorized, by now, but that doesn't really help. I need someone to keep me honest.

voice

[skindeep]

I wish I was more familiar with it. It's not the sort of thing anyone should have to go through alone.

[text]

[jurisimpudent]

I have read about the program.

[text]

[kicktomorrow]

How familiar are you with it?

[text]

[jurisimpudent]

I know the rules of conduct and how to refer someone to the program.

[text]

[kicktomorrow]

So do you think you could help me out?

[text]

[jurisimpudent]

I can if that is your desire.

text

[hejhej]

[She'd sent Jesse off to get some soda.]

We had >>Anonyma Narkomaner<< in Sweden.

text

[kicktomorrow]

[Watching them together was how Jane was sure she'd made the right call. Lisbeth cared, and she knew how to handle Jesse. Not a chance Jane would interfere with that.

She liked her already, and that's why she hadn't asked, even though it was the obvious thing to do. She didn't want Lisbeth to...think less of her, or feel responsible. She wanted to be strong.

But she's been throwing up all day and she feels like garbage. Strong is out the window.]

I know this might be a lot to ask.

[Because they both know what's going on.]

text

[hejhej]

[Ever since she'd moved in with the both of them, there was never a time where Lisbeth felt alone. She still went to the oxygen gardens or the library to find solace, but she didn't mind doing her work when all three of them were in the room together. Usually Jane would facetiously try to distract her from her math.

But the implications of what Jane was saying weren't lost on her.]

You want me to be your sponsor.

text

[kicktomorrow]

[Lisbeth was blindingly smart. Jane knew that she, personally, wasn't stupid, but Lisbeth was a genius. She loved watching her do her thing, like she loved watching any artist at work.

She doesn't want Lisbeth to just tolerate her, or even just like her. She wants...a lot of things. And this could ruin them all.]

You helped Jesse. And I trust you if he does. I'm just worried it might make things...complicated. But I can handle it if you can.

text

[hejhej]

[Lisbeth feels her stomach churn when Jane mentions she'd helped Jesse. Jesse at home was back on meth and no amount of pouting or pleading made him stop or reconsider. He just made excuses and she turned a blind eye.

She then remembered what she'd said to Jesse when he told her all about Jane. This was a second chance. Wasn't it funny how these alternate realities seemed to have a common theme?]

I've seen some pretty bad shit. I can do it.

Voice |

[watashinonamaewa]

[ Cibo didn't understand anything in that text. Which is probably why she's curious now. Just... forgive her ignorance. ]

What are these 12 steps you spoke of?

[ Pause of confusion. ]

And what is conditioner?

Voice |

[kicktomorrow]

[Stupid alien spaceship. Jane regrets this. She never should have put it up, never should have opened her mouth. She wants to score more than ever. Why did she let Jesse flush her stash? What was she thinking?]

The twelve step program is for addicts trying to get sober. And conditioner is a hair product. You wash your hair with shampoo to clean it and then use conditioner to make it soft and manageable.

[...she feels like an Herbal Essences commercial.]

Voice |

[watashinonamaewa]

[ This is more information than Cibo had previously but not enough to help her fully understand. Hearing something of irritation in the tone of this woman's voice convinces Cibo not to push for additional information.

Cibo has also never had hair troubles. Things got dirty where she was from, occasionally there would be contaminated water to wash the blood off - other than that, you dealt with the grime.]

If it is some sort of biological imbalance or a chemical that your body needs for survival, then I may be able to re-fabricate a substitute. If you're looking to purge the chemical from your system, I might be capable of that as well.

Voice |

[kicktomorrow]

No.

[It comes out sharper than she means it to, but the idea--God, no, replacements, substitutes? It's incredibly tempting and that's why it's so dangerous. She can't go there.]

No--look, I appreciate that you want to help, but it doesn't work that way. I have to kick it psychologically more than physically. It's not really the heroin that's the problem.

Voice |

[watashinonamaewa]

Heroin? [ The word flies right over her head. ]

Perhaps it would distract you if you showed me more of how these hair products worked?

[ Okay, Cibo. We know you're trying to help but... That may be creepy to normal people. ]

Or if you further explain those 12 steps, I would be able to guide you. [ That's a little better. ]