video;

[alsohawkeye]

[ Kate is framed from shoulders up, in a black tank and ponytail. Over her shoulder some might recognize a shuttle bay. She looks annoyed, mouth set in a thin line, dark brows angled inwards. The camera is panned so she is out of frame and instead there are rows of half-built spacecraft, smaller than the shuttles in the main bay. She talks from off-screen. ]

These are fighter craft. Attack ships. We haven't got a single one finished yet, which is kind of a problem since in case you missed it or somehow forgot, Van Rijn knows where we are now and is sending more ships after us. These need to get built, and people need to learn to fly them. And the ship's guns need repairing.

[ She turns the camera around again, still annoyed but trying very hard to be serious and persuasive and not just irritable/irritating. There's a smudge of grease on her bicep and she swipes at it with her free hand but only makes it worse. ]

I don't know shit about engineering or mechanics, I could barely put the chain back on my own bicycle before I got here. But I am pitching in and trying to learn because if we don't get this stuff done we are dead in the water. Okay? This shit is important. It is the most important, right now. So even if you're in another department already, you should be here helping with this, and if you're not in a department you should absolutely be helping with this. Also, who the hell doesn't want to learn to fly a spaceship or shoot giant spacecannons? So go sign up already and do your part, or I want to know why you aren't.

And I know people love polls, so we'll end with a poll. Are you not helping out because you're:

A) confused
B) lazy
C) hoping we all die
or
D) all of the above?

If it's A then read the things I've linked below and sign up, or ask me whatever and then sign up. I know being new sucks and is confusing and I'm happy to help but it's your asses we're trying to protect here too, so you should still be pitching in. If it's B, C, or D, still read the things below and sign up. No excuses. Everyone just please get on this, okay?


Att: volunteer sign-ups
Att: gunnery sign-ups

Comments

TEXT

[theroadwarrior]

E.

[and then he tosses his device and naps lightly

who says max doesn't get involved in the community]

text

[alsohawkeye]

Hilarious.

voice (BECAUSE HE'S WORKING)

[fullmoon]

Decided to go with a charm offensive, I see.

voice

[alsohawkeye]

[ SIGH ]

This was much nicer than the first version I recorded. Come on, it's not that bad. [ Is it? ]

[mikangirl]

Try 'E'. Which is I just got here and I have no idea who Van Rijn is.

[She makes no attempt not to sound irritated, because she is, because the 'yanked on board ship without consent and told to work' thing gets real old when you're a pirate. Especially framed this way. That being said--]

I signed up already.

[She just wants to know about apparently attacking ships.]

[alsohawkeye]

[ Kate does make an attempt to sound less irritated. It's mostly successful. Mostly. ]

That's not E, that's A. Like I said at the end, I know everything sucks and is confusing especially for new people, but that's why we've made handy guides. Van Rijn is basic stuff that I know for a fact is included in the welcome packet and William's database which I'm pretty sure Support provides links to when you get here.

I'm not asking you to already understand everything, I'm just saying that now that you've had a week to stop crying and looking for two way mirrors or a magical portal home or whatever, it's time to start getting integrated. Jax and Natasha and Mystique have all made posts explaining why it's important to sign up and help out and how to do it and people still aren't doing it.

So if you've already signed up then good job, I wasn't even talking to you, anyway.

voice.

[throwsdown]

It's — it's important to sign up?

[He looks mildly stressed out, because ah I am failing as a teammate. Granted he's been surprisingly stressed for a kid his age since the jump. Losing his space father and having to be miserable and worry about his mother and the gardens being okay and — this sounds important, too...!]

voice.

[alsohawkeye]

[ Uhhhhhhhh.... That sounds like a child, which gives Kate pause (because seriously wtf) and there is both a rush to respond and a confused delay all at once, which ends up with an awkward attempt at a gentle brush-off. ]

Nnnnno, no, that's okay. I mean, yes, it is important, but don't worry about it, okay? I'm sure you're already helping as much as you can.

[video]

[tongueamok]

I'm... going to go with A, I suppose. Is there an option for if we're not interested in learning how to shoot giant spacecannons?

[video]

[alsohawkeye]

Yes, definitely A.

[ Because anyone who thinks they're not interested in giant spacecannons is clearly confused. ]

text.

[forgodssake]

someone needs their morning coffee

I'll put out a memo to my underlings to get flight training and see who has relevant engineering background
Severus had thought to train up the XG staff before and they've all rotated out besides myself
so it goes

[alsohawkeye]

The coffee here is so bad but I've still drunk my way through just about all of it by now. I'm literally drinking it by the pot. From the pot.

But thanks, that'd be helpful.

voice;

[slurpeesinhell]

[Whatever this guy's day has been like so far, it has led him to a place where he is slurring probably too loudly. While some of the slurring is due to his swollen jaw, the rest of it is not.]

We gotta answer to you now, huh? Well alright, girl, here's mine: how bout F, as in f—

not here.

[betterangels]

[ Static immediately interrupts Daryl's transmission, but it's nothing supernatural -- just Rick's palm coming down over it, twisting it out of his friend's grasp-- ]

--atter with you, [ manages to be picked up. Disconnect, a thumb press later. ]

Not here at all

[theroadwarrior]

[Heeeey, it's redneck guy!

... You sound like shit.]

Video

[dino_zarf]

Sidenote: In my expert opinion, these look like they're going to be really zippy.

[Because obviously that's all anyone should need]

[alsohawkeye]

They seriously do. Like there should be a waiting list to fly these things, we should not be having to beg for help.

voice;

[axeyou]

I can tell you why I'm not.

voice

[alsohawkeye]

Because you're a selfish bitch.

video;

[hacker]

[ Aware she's asking an obvious question, Skye goes for it anyway, shrugging, ] Who's van Rijn?

video;

[alsohawkeye]

[ A heavy sigh from Kate that she does not bother not to record. Also a pause in which she attempts to sound less frustrated than she is. ]

He's the prime minister of the human civilization in this galaxy. He's like two hundred years old and a dictator and he had this ship built to conquer and colonize new planets and he really wants it back and now his people have finally caught up to us. Seriously, does nobody read the welcome packets? I linked them to somebody a couple comments up.

voice.

[queasycrow]

I am here to fly your spacecrafts.

[ Said with unbridled confidence. There is irony yet to read into it. ]

And you had me at 'shoot giant', so also the part about the spacecannons.

voice; i give up trying to be funny

[alsohawkeye]

Finally, a man after my own heart. What's your name? I'll make sure you have dibs on any giants I come across.

[kutte]

Thanks for the assist.
You wanna teach me how to fly one of those rigs?

1/2

[alsohawkeye]

Do I ever. You can sit on my lap and steer while I do the pedals.