XX1: Getting to Know You

[syllogism]

That debacle was pretty much something out of an extra terrestrial movie where various sentient beings are abducted from their home planets and jam-jarred for observation. The subjects are convinced that their confinement is inescapable, gradually assume complacency, and adapt to their new lives under the oppressive scrutiny of a humongous totalitarian microscope. They eventually all but forget Big Brother's watchful eyes behind concealed cameras recording everything down to the minutiae of their daily lives, and any genre-savvy movie enthusiast could easily tell you what's soon to follow.

It's actually not half bad. I'm sure someone out there has had it worse.

Let's get down to business. I'm taking a roll call.

Raise your hand if you're familiar with any of the following chumhandles:

• gutsyGumshoe
• tipsyGnostalgic
• golgothasTerror

If you're not one of them, that's also cool. I'm not going to be disappointed.

Comments

[voice]

[wolfdreamer]

[What even does any of this mean. Four readings later and Bran is still not certain that he isn't reading some untranslated manuscript, artfully and impossibly rendered in yellow.

He can't work out text, but he can fumble to reply by voice, at least.]

Are they creatures?

text; askdjfalsdjf WHY SO CUTE i has to make time to watch GoT

[syllogism]

Absolutely.
The aforementioned three are undoubtedly creatures known scientifically as homo sapiens, more commonly termed as humans, and collectively referred to as mankind.
I am also a human creature.
What manner of creature are you?

voice; aww ;u; YOU REALLY REALLY SHOULD I high recommend it!

[wolfdreamer]

[He pauses to consider the answer to this question.]

Human. Ho-mo sap-ens, I think. [And he hesitates again, wary of seeming stupid, but he wants to work out the riddle.] Is "Chumhandle" their house?

text; STARTED WATCHING YESTERDAY EVENING OH YAY XDDD

[syllogism]

Yeah, and it is the most notorious SBURB house there ever could be.
The number of Chumhandles may easily surpass the thousands,
And their warriors are a fearsome bunch.
The aforementioned three and I are, of course, among the elite.
Naturally, golgathasTerror is a force to be reckoned with.
What about you? What can you tell me about yourself?

voice; EEEEE YAAAAAAY enjoy enjoy enjoy--! but it's so great of COURSE you'll enjoy C:

[wolfdreamer]

I've not heard of-- [He works out how to pronounce the strange house name as quickly as he can, and only stumbles on it a little--] Ess-burb house. But there are people of many different lands here.

[There's another brief hesitation. What can he say about himself?]

I'm not a warrior, or a force. Are you a knight or a sell-sword? Or are you called something else, in your land?

text;

[syllogism]

I am Dirk Strider, chumhandle timaeusTestified, the Prince of Heart and Dersite Dreamer, the sickwicked Autodidact on Ancient Civilizations, a selfmade Master of Mythologue, preternatural Popculture Academe, a Renaissance Ninja, the Philosopher Prince, Lucid Waker and Dersite Spy, Flashstep Puppeteer, Pantheonic Ironicist, Gangsta Logician, a Dabbler in the Fine Sequential Arts, Producer of the Pornographic, a Builder of Robots, Rap Duelist to the Death.
Indeed, you may be unfamiliar with many of the aforementioned terms of phrase as this ship is replete with passengers from many different lands and unknown kingdoms that are worlds away.
As you are presently neither warrior nor force, to which calling do you aspire?

voice;

[wolfdreamer]

[Oh. A prince. The titles are unknown to Bran, but he recognizes that much at least. And surely a prince of so many titles is one to be respected, no matter how strange those titles might be.]

I used to think of being a knight, but I'm a prince now, too. Only I'm just the Prince in the North. Sometimes they called me the Stark in Winterfell, too. [Though he's no longer in Winterfell, not here or at home. It's strange to lie so directly, but he must needs protect himself.] What did you do to earn such titles, Prince Dirk? Are they all for valor in combat?

text;

[syllogism]

Not all are for battle prowess, Bran.
However, there certainly are a few that are connected to it in a rather direct manner while others are more tangentially related instead.
I've dabbled and practiced a number of trades and have studied an assortment of sciences and arts before choosing but a handful to concentrate on and exert myself in until capable of demonstrating unequaled mastery in each one.
Time and again, I have exhibited my propensity, competence, and ingenuity before the upper echelons of nobility and gentility alike.
As such, they adorned me with the numerous titles, styles, and other embellishments as mentioned above.

voice;

[wolfdreamer]

Oh.

[There is a bit of admiration in his voice now. Someone who is a maester, and a knight, and a warrior, and a prince deserves no less.]

They're good titles--but they must make your introductions at feasts terribly long. Do they announce them all?

text;

[syllogism]

There are abbreviated versions, but they would make even less sense to anyone unable to recognize their original, expanded form.
Besides, I unfortunately have few opportunities to either attend or host feasts.
It's as though my world has taken a nosedive into an incredibly deadly game where evil, tyrannical forces are in command.
I'd imagine, though, that every world has its own problems,
And it's best not to dwell on them in a place like this.
It's unlikely that anything we do now will affect the places where we are no longer.
What is it like in the world that you come from?

voice;

[wolfdreamer]

[He's quiet a moment before replying, thinking. There's Winterfell, and Westeros--and then there is what he has left behind, which sometimes seems a different world.]

It's summer in Westeros, but it's growing colder. Winterfell is farthest to the north, so we always feel the cold first--Winterfell is my family's castle. [Another pause, and then he adds:] I think our worlds might be much the same, but my brother is fighting against the forces in Westeros. Do people fight, where you're from?

text;

[syllogism]

There was once a time when people fought in a rather non-traditional sense, for they had abandoned the use of swords, spears, knives, and other sorts of blades.
Instead, their weapons were veiled messages hidden in words and images broadcast throughout the world, or tasteless poisons presented in food for the masses.
At least, that is what I'm led to believe.
I live in a perilous time when evil prevails, hunting and culling any few and far between traces of humanity, while the last remaining heroes are confined and concealed, seeking and taking any opportunity to strike at their dominating despotic overlords.
I have never experienced a winter and wonder if it's even possible where I've come from.
Is the winter cold your enemy?

voice;

[wolfdreamer]

[Poison would kill. But messages-- It must be some magic--or science, though he isn't sure of the meaning of that word. If it were magic, it would be like a story.]

My brother fights men, not cold--it's men that do evil, not winter. And we wouldn't fight winter, we're of the north. Winter would be our ally against both false and bad kings.

But how could you have no winter? Do you come from some land of waste or sand?

text;

[syllogism]

I suspect that my home was considered far enough south to remain largely unaffected by winter's cold during the antediluvian times.
Though as it is now, my castle stands in a seemingly unending sea with but a single tower rising from the water's surface.
It's much less a fortress and more a prison than anything else.
If only your winter could ally with the heroes of my world to unseat our contemptible sovereigns, but the time for heroes to rise up draws near.
Perhaps it's already come, and I am neither there to bear its witness nor play my role.

voice;

[wolfdreamer]

[Prince Dirk is also a hero, Bran can gather that much from this. Their worlds are quite different, and there are yet many things Bran does not understand, but he understands heroes and contemptible sovereigns well enough.]

Winter doesn't even help my brother, not really. But if we could command it, I would send it to your world, to help you. Is your tower besieged? Is that what makes it a prison?

[The last bit is troubling, so he adds, to give some hope:] The best heroes always ride in to finish the battles. If the fight has come to your kingdom, that leaves you the best part to play.