[voice.] 5-6 hours before the jump on the 7th, abouts.

[foolproofed]

[Static. Lots and lots of static. Not that it much matters, because at the start, Marty's just rambling about random shit. Stupid little stories from home; there are probably other voices from the brig muffled here and there in the background as he makes his way from the small crowd of mutineers to record what is probably going to be a swan song affair. He's never been very good about any of this. Or particularly graceful. Accepting death is easier for him than it maybe should be, but he's not exactly wanting to die. Again. So. There's that.]

░░░▒▒▓▓▒▒░░ --ad idea. Anyway, ░░░▒▒▓▓▒▒░░. Maybe I should just do some ░░░▒.

░░░▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░

Story time? I guess. [A little laugh; maybe a crazy one? He's not sure. He's exhausted. And maybe a little high.] There was once a jester, was friends with a noble ragtag team ░░░░░ -- there was a knight and his fair medic. Super attractive couple, I'll admit I'm jealous there. There was a scholar, and then there was a foxy fair maiden. They all decided to leave their domain for a little ░░░▒▒▒░░, but they didn't realize that someone had followed them. Someone from a cult, people who... Well, they liked to sacrifice people to make the Gods happy. Because gods are always sadistic fucks in a lot of stories, right?? This one can go eat a ▓▓▓▓▓▓. Anyway... The jester noticed something was amiss when they arrived to their eden of rest. But unfortunately, the cult's undead minions -- killed the kindly medic, left the group ▓ in shock. Wasn't much later that the jester got his dumb ass impaled on a garden shovel. Who does that, right?

▓▓▓▓▓▓

Then... I mean, the jester didn't catalog a lot ▓▓it, but despite their best efforts, the remaining team couldn't leave. The cult had used ancient power to lock them all in a forcefield. ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ the knight was killed when he'd tried to find a way around it, and the scholar -- they got him, too. Eventually... it was just the fair minx of a maiden. Alone, with these -- these undead freaks. She fought so fucking hard, let me tell you. This maiden? She was secretly a warrior. She fucking survived.

[He smiles from behind the camera.]

Suddenly -- the jester! Holy crap, he's alive! You wouldn't even have guessed right? Scrawny little weirdo made it after all. ▒▒▒y bust through the zombies, find the cult's ancient lair, and descent with no where else to go. ▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░ Monsters. The cult had monsters of all kinds, all lore, hidden in the depths in cages. They would use these monsters to kill unsuspecting sacrifices, year after year, and so... so the fair maiden had an idea. Attacked from all fuckin' sides, the maiden warrior released all the monsters from their cages, and the cult didn't stand a chance against their own ▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░▒▒▒▒░░. 

They made it to the ritual room -- and met the asshole leader of ancients. She told them that....

[There's a long pause. A thoughtful, sad one, really.]

She didn't tell them anything. Because the fair maiden put an ax through her head, and they -- the two got out. Together.

[He snorts a little.]

They probably figured they'd go on another trip to space, I bet, but that'd be kind of outlandish, huh?

H▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░░░░░░░░░░░... ░░░░░░

[The rest sort of fades into static off and on again.]

Comments

[voice]

[jurisimpudent]

[There's a little break in Edgeworth's voice when he speaks. The words are just like they ever are, but his voice is strained, stressed, exhausted, cracking.]

This is no time for autobiographies. What's the status in there?

[voice // private]

[foolproofed]

[The's a pause before that, punctuated by static.]

Pretty much at the end of our ropes.

[Another beat. His usually carefree tone that had been adopted even six days ago is a little softer and more resigned now.]

Not as bad as it could be, bu▓▓▒▒░░░░░░░░░...

Think we're all just waiting for the last hurrah.

[voice // private]

[jurisimpudent]

[Edgeworth's voice is harsh.]

Do not be an idiot. You're not waiting for anything. You're working towards extricating yourselves from that situation.

[voice // private]

[foolproofed]

▒▒▒ tried, man. We've been working on everything here.

[He tiredly rests his head back, feeling spent and mildly crazy.]

Don't think the gods are gonna be letting us out unles▒▒░░▒▒▒▒░░ feel like it.

[voice // private]

[jurisimpudent]

There is no such thing as a "god." Honestly, stop sounding like you're about to start napping and do something productive.

NOT HERE. BECAUSE FUCK YOU MARTY.

[catatonics]

[ dana listens to the story, her grip on her communicator tight and her teeth gritted. she hasn't left the corridor outside the bridge unless she absolutely has to, hasn't eaten, has barely slept... your minxy maiden isn't looking good, marty. she manages to get through almost the whole story without making a sound... and then he lies, and she sobs. and then she can't stop crying, horrible gut-wrenching sobs that hurt almost as much as that story did. she can't talk to marty like this, so she says nothing. ]

MARTY'S SORRY OKAY

[foolproofed]

[Sorry, Dana. Love you, boo. :(]

video » apparently i feel like making myself cry tonight

[catatonics]

[ a few minutes later, once dana's gotten her uncontrollable sobbing to a more manageable level, she opens up a video feed. her eyes are red and there are obvious tear tracks on her face, but her expression is fierce. ]

The warrior maiden isn't going to give up now. If the gods couldn't beat her, a stupid spaceship isn't going to either.

video » xoxo

[foolproofed]

[He wasn't sure if she'd reply or not, but there's a clear relief in his shoulders through the fuzzy video footage. He's blurred and it seems like the network device really is scrambling to get the footage through.]

Well, yeah. We just need to give you an axe, right? Let you go at 'em.

[His voice is full of exhaustion, but it's all fond, because he's just happy to hear from her right now.]

[voice]

[sweetmotherofgod]

[Marty may be a dreamer and a goofball but he's not stupid, not by a long shot. If there was anything he could do - he'd be doing it, right?

But he's not. The significance of that isn't lost on her, bleeds into her voice and weighs it down.]

Marty. You -

You idiot.

[voice]

[foolproofed]

[He's quiet, leaning his head into his hands, elbows on his knees.]

I'm sorry — I couldn't get the doors open. Should've gotten everyone out, y'know...? Was supposed to help get them out.

[He's got band-aids on his fingers from working hours at the door panel, with no success, even.]

[voice]

[sweetmotherofgod]

[Oh, no. It's the apology that does her in, sets off a vicious squeezing in her chest that works its way up and out into a choked little sob.]

Don't -

[It's a waste of breath, to tell him not to be sorry. He will be anyway, and she doesn't really mean it. He should be sorry. There are far too few people like him, and it's only right to be sorry that soon there'll be one less.

But if there's only a few hours left, she doesn't want to spend them scolding him.]

How'd they get out? The jester and the warrior maiden?

[voice]

[foolproofed]

[He stares at the screen for a while, not remotely sure how to lie through his teeth when she's upset like that. But he's gotta, because he's not about to ruin even the story he tried to pathetically spin into something else.]

They smoked a lot of pot and then rode a unicorn outta there.

[He grins crookedly.]

At l░ast I think that's how it went. Y▒▒▓ know how compromised narratives are.

anon text;

[endureandsurvive]

dont be a drama queen ur gonna be fine and ppl r going 2 get u out and then u can make a shitton of pickle juice ice pops

perma-non!anon

[foolproofed]

heeey there, its t▒░░░░░░░░ymous friend from my other network entry

try any of those juice ice pops? you should totally try it out, I'm telling you

[Talking's nice. Let's just talk, type dumb texts. 'Til it's almost time to bite the dust, if it really comes down to that.]

[endureandsurvive]

no so u should make me some after the jump

[foolproofed]

ye▒h I'll have to do that

ur righ▒▒▒t

but if I'm too tired to i gotta depend on ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒u anon friend

action spammin'

[kutte]

[ it's a goodbye. jax is pissed about it, doesn't want to acknowledge it. he doesn't want to fucking join in and say his farewells. he doesn't want to give up. he's sitting on the floor, watching, elbows on his knees. ]

How much of that's bullshit?

[ probably none. that seems to be the fashion up here, crazy shit, all completely true. or something. ]

action all day errday

[foolproofed]

[Jax, man, you gotta let go a little. At least enough that you don't turn into a vengeful spirit and haunt the place. Did you take a joint like I offered you all yet? Take a fuckin' joint okay.]

How much?

Hhmm... They weren't really from the middle ages.

[yep so basically most of it is completely accurate]

party up in here up in here

[kutte]

[ pass that shit over, marty. do you know how long it's been since jax had bud? since he arrived on the ship, that's how long. ]

So monsters and fair maidens and whatever the fuck else...?

[ marty are those metaphors or??? ]

shhhh i luv ya

[foolproofed]

The monsters were super real. The shit I saw — dude, I went through an underground facility where they kept just about any monster you can think of. I shot a Hills Have Eyes dude in the face.

voice;

[gothchicklit]

Is that a true story? [ October's pretty sure he's talking about people he knew, possibly even himself, but it sounds like it could be exaggerated for effect. ]

voice;

[foolproofed]

▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓tcha, 100% historically accurate.

Maybe with less knights and castles.

voice; please forgive my slowness ;;

[gothchicklit]

Sounds pretty fucked up. [ To put it mildly. ] The jester sounds like a badass, though, making it through being impaled.

voice; it's okay! I'm real slow from rl :)

[foolproofed]

Or just really fuckin' hard to kill. But to be fair, what kind of zombie throws trowels like ninja stars here??