video; mis-step seven [forward dated to 2/5]

[rubblegoddess]

[A burst of static opens the contact, then followed by the image of a woman with dark hair pulled back into a ponytail. She half-smiles as she leans on a wall, a wall she swears was trying to disintegrate not a moment ago. The little issues with the bridge are beginning to gnaw at the edges of her senses here and there, but her main problem is the condition she has. Rampancy. The deterioration of function and logic in an elderly AI. And all this overstimulation is starting to make it worse, to push her into places she thought she could hold off.]

It's loud, and it's small. No, it's big. Very strange in here.

[The feed ends. Later, another message is sent, her voice higher, more strained. Fear, anger.]

I only had the best of intentions. I wanted to do to them what they've done to us because I can't take it anymore and you shouldn't help me because what if they do it to you, too? No, don't. Don't tell them who you are. It's them and they know. They have the weapons, we don't.

[There's a loud sigh, and another burst of static distorts the image, and the feed ends. A few minutes later, it begins again, her voice calm, face placid. Sometimes she thinks she can control it. Sometimes she can. But sometimes it sends her to dark and dangerous places.]

The human mind is fragile, fragile like mine, it sort of... there's a hum, a buzz, static in my head and I can't process everything. Did you know I can think myself into nothing? I can. I probably should. It's too hard to do this, too loud, too much to want to know and not be able to think about because thinking hurts.

Pain is strange.

[A lengthy silence, filled with lines and static. Her voice is flat, as though she's merely curious.]

Am I going to die again?

Comments

video;

[notthesecondworstfighter]

Juliana. Juliana!

[Nononono, this is no what he wants to be seeing or hearing. He had a feeling, when he couldn't find her, that she might have joined the mutiny. But no, he'd thought she wouldn't have, not after their talk, not after he told her not to do something like that without him--

Yet here she is. On his screen, looking like this, seeming very... He doesn't want to think the word. It scares him too much. Seeing her like this does too. So torn between anger and fear and worry, he just stares down at her on the screen for a moment, his expression conflicted.]

You're not going to die. [Because he's going to get her the hell out before anything can happen, he is.] What the hell are you doing in there?! Why didn't you tell me what you were doing?!

[Not the best time for lecturing, but he can't believe she did this, can't believe she got herself trapped in there and now she's...

--No. He still doesn't want to think about it.]

video;

[rubblegoddess]

[No.

She knows that voice. It's not from home, it's from here, so it feels a little foreign, but comforting at the same time. Who is it?

No, now she recognizes the face, and she smiles faintly.]

I didn't want you to worry about me. I thought we'd be finished already.

video;

[notthesecondworstfighter]

Well, you're not. You're stuck.

[It comes out angrier than he wants, more harsh than he intends, but his worry for her is magnifying his anger. He can't help it. She's the last person he has here to care about, and she's gone and thrown herself into danger. She's-- ...She's not doing well.

He'd rather be trapped in there with her than out here, not being able to do anything for her. But she didn't tell him that she was doing this.]

You should have told me. [On the screen, the background behind him is moving, because he's running. Running toward the bridge doors. If he can get her out, he's damn well going to.]

You-- [He breathes harshly and his pace slows slightly, gaze dropping back down to the screen.] Are you okay?

video;

[rubblegoddess]

I know I'm stuck. I'm sorry.

[She ducks her head, jostling the video. Now that she's remembering things, remembering who he is and how they've been, she laughs. It's melodic and lengthy. Nothing makes sense, not even this.]

I should have told you and you wouldn't have let me go. I thought I could help. I knew I could help. I wanted to help. I didn't help, did I? I'm so useless--we're all useless--and I'm scared.

[The laugh ends in a choked sob. She's upset him. She's made him worry. She's done something horribly wrong and now she's going to die and she deserves it, but he's going to be alone and isolated inside her own head.]

Come get me out, please?

video;

[notthesecondworstfighter]

[The laugh has him pausing entirely and watching her with even more intense worry. This would be bad on its own, if the mutiny had backfired and she'd been trapped, but she's clearly...cracking. The--...Her rampancy. It's not being helped by the events going on, and he's scared.]

I'm on my way.

[Without even bothering to respond to anything else she says, because it would take too long to explain, he just starts running again. Getting her out, that's the most important part now, anyway. They can discuss everything else once he gets her out. Because he's going to get her out. He's not going to let this ship or whoever's in charge do anything to her, he's not going to let her get hurt. He finally has a chance to save someone he cares about, and he's damn well going to make sure he does.]

Just try to stay calm, okay? I'll be there soon. I'll get you out.

video;

[rubblegoddess]

Okay.

[She'll apologize later, profusely and loudly and with every adjective she can come up with. She never meant to scare him or to cause problems. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

All she wants is to be out of here so she can sleep, eat, do whatever she wants, and forget how stupid this was.]

Okay, thank you. I miss you.

[needsheadphones]

[ Things are getting weird on the bridge. Rebecca is fairly certain it's not real, or at least not any realer than the flickering images of Juno in the temple were, which means it's still very much likely to be dangerous.

Juliana isn't faring so well, though. They haven't really spoken much outside of the necessity, but as far as she's concerned, she's not going to magically breakthrough the computers while checking on the other woman. ]

Come here, sit down. Talk to me, that helps.

[rubblegoddess]

[Juliana rubs at her arms for a moment as if shes cold or frightened. And she is frightened, not because they're trapped, but because she's completely losing her grip. Rampancy. She staved it off for so long, and it was easier with a human mind, but now she's slipping.]

Do you really want to talk to me?

[Juliana had been working on the computers, but now she's given up. Still.]

[needsheadphones]

Yeah.

[ Rebecca steps a little closer, offers Juliana her hand. ]

I know we were all kind of introduced, ish, but I'm Rebecca. You can hold onto my hand if you want to, sometimes touch helps.

[rubblegoddess]

[Shakily, she takes it, gripping the other woman's hand tightly after a moment.]

Juliana. [She takes a deep breath.] I've never been through something like this before. I wasn't always like this... [Vaguely insane, human, whatever, she means it all.]

I've seen you working on the computers.

[needsheadphones]

[ Rebecca squeezes her hand, rubbing her thumb over the back of it. ]

Yeah. Computers are my thing, back home. Well, them and sports.

[ She moves her other hand to pull the other woman a little closer into a half-hug; Rebecca would hug her entirely, but she's not sure how Juliana will take even that much. ]

It's scary, I know.

[rubblegoddess]

Mine as well, in a manner of speaking. Computers, at least. I've never tried sports. I never could.

[Hug. Hugs are good but it reminds her of someone and that makes her tense for a moment before forcing herself to relax. He's out there. He'll get her out. They all will, won't they?]

I shouldn't worry, but it... It upsets me. My brain, my logic, my processing. It's all off.

[needsheadphones]

Never could? Why not?

[ Rebecca immediately makes a shushing sort of sound, like she's trying to soothe a wild animal, and rubs her back. ]

Times like this, just about anyone would be all off. If you weren't having some sort of strong emotional reaction to it, then I'd be kind of worried, honestly.

video

[foundafamily]

I don't think any of us here can predict the future, so the jury's out on that.

[Despite the levity of his tone, her message unnerves him. For all he knows, maybe the trapped people will die while the rest of them sit out here helplessly.]

What exactly is happening over there?

[He wants to ask if she's okay, but the answer to that is already obvious.]

video

[rubblegoddess]

...I don't know. Have you ever died?

[A sigh.]

It's a little frightening. And in here, it's just... quiet, loud chaos. We;re working but nothing is helping.

video

[foundafamily]

[He flinches at the question. Answering that would require explaining things he doesn't want to explain. Immediately he feels ashamed of the thought, but he finds himself hoping she's distracted enough that she won't notice him not responding to it.]

What're you guys workin' on? You think whatever you're messin' with is tryin' to screw with you?

[Well, more succeeding than trying it seems.]

video

[rubblegoddess]

I'm... trying to adjust the comms system to give us a better signal. [She sounds a little pathetic now, ducking her head and shaking it.] I was going to work on the doors next. I think we've done something ill-advised, and that we may suffer some for it. That's... all.

video

[foundafamily]

Yeah, "ill-advised" is one way to put it. But at least you're doin' somethin'.

[He doesn't know if he's relieved or not that he didn't ask to go with them. He does know that he feels pretty damn useless.]

video

[rubblegoddess]

Something that ends in nothing. Right now I don't know what will happen. I want out. I need to be out. I have things to do.

( action. )

[overthought]

[hey, it's okay. cortana sits with her quietly, legs folded up to her chest as she makes herself seem small.]

I'm so used to him just barreling in to save us all. [him being john- the master chief. she's never cried before; not on high charity, not when she died saving him.]

Somehow, I think this is worse than Rampancy. [does Juliana know Rampancy? she doesn't know if she does or not, but if she dies at least a former AI like herself should know who she was.] It's a lot nicer to know that you have a definite end than just waiting around, not knowing.

( action. )

[rubblegoddess]

[A sigh, and Juliana runs a hand over her hair. She's far from okay, but hearing her speak of a hero gives just a bit of hope.] I imagine Jai will come save us. He's very stubborn, and if I ask him nicely, he'll do things.

[That next comment rings home, and when Juliana speaks, it is with conviction.]

It is rampancy. I've fought it for too long not to recognize it. It's just always been there and being human has made it stick. Do you know how old I am? I forget. Is it ten years? Twelve? I was in storage for some time.

( action. )

[overthought]

[jai isn't john. no one is john and john isn't here. she won't talk about it.]

You're doing well for the condition. [cortana leans back knowingly, as if getting prepared to rip open an old wound.] You don't over think things, or you're not struggling to be able to perform basic things that were usually background processes.

[a beat:]

I was put into service eight years ago. [she doesn't need to tell her how long it takes for them to deteriorate.] Maybe if I was put into storage, it would have been... smoother.

( action. )

[rubblegoddess]

Doing well. You're very kind. It's not hard to do well. I mean, I've always been so busy that I can reidrect things and sever connections in sequences that keep me on my toes. [A pause.] I could. Once. It's so much harder like this. Being human. The little things, they're harder.

[But she mellows a bit and lets Cortana speak.] Perhaps it would have, perhaps not. It's impossible to say, isn't it? Because we're living it, not breathing it, sitting here wondering why we're doing what we're doing and why I can't just be what I was, glorious and majestic in my Rubble.

[A sigh. If there was a rampancy checklist, she'd be ticking off boxes left and right.]

...Smoother, indeed.

( action. )

[overthought]

[it's harder talking to the older models. at least she had an anchor- hers was john. and she had put him in danger because of it. she gives her a half smile, dropping it almost immediately before it even was formed.]

I already died. It was just - nice, I suppose. To live again.

( action. )

[rubblegoddess]

...I'm sorry.

[She doesn't know what else to say. Sure, she's dead, too, but... She did it of her own volition. What if Cortana didn't have a choice?]

But I'm glad you're here. That you have this chance. It's very interesting.