ataraxion | video.

[When the camera turns on, Marty's adjusting it before plopping down in a seat clumsily (grumbling 'fuckin' jelly legs' or something to that effect); he's got dust and oil on him, a little toil and trouble with the clean-up assistance he's been performing on the Tranquility (after pilfering a gun from the Scylla, of course). He's bone-tired and there's a bit of sweat on his brow, but in that weariness he finds temporary redirection from the shitty stuff. He's noticed, of course, people fighting plenty. People looking very tense and unhappy. The halls are even quieter, somehow. And he doesn't fuckin' like it, not one bit. Now, he's not particularly attached to this ship--duh, he's only been here a month and it's a horrible place on top of it--but like hell does he enjoy misery as company. That saying can just go shove it.

I mean, he's barely even smoking it up, lately. In fact, he's stone cold normal right now and empty-handed. They're just clasped in front of him as he leans into his knees.]

You know what I need? A break. A cigarette break, but with more words 'n shit. We've been working our asses off. Keep up the fantastic work, and all that jazz, but how about something else for a second? Juuust a second. I know we've all been stressed out, what with the pirates and the freaky-ass murdering specter captains and the--uh--ship clamped on us like a tumor. So just... Hey, I haven't--really indulged in the fact that we're all from every corner of time and space and universes and all that cool sci-fi stuff.

[He licks his lips as he considers what to say, hands motioning in front of him like he's trying to catch his own thoughts.]

You guys, we have all kinds of worlds on board! Tell me some cool shit about your world. Or about you. Whatever. Can I get some cool facts? Some jokes? Stories? Hell, it doesn't even have to be anything outside of good ol' planet Earth. Or even directed at me. No serious or traumatic stuff needed, just... stuff. Hell, if you're a connoisseur of movies or you have a thing for panda facts or you wanna tell a story about your crazy family reunions.

[He suddenly seems a little more excited, a little less tired, shifting in his seat.]

This entry is now Marty's Share Fair. I'm stuck on a funky space ship and all, so I might as well know more than the bleak stuff.

....

Just don't pull a TMI, okay? I'm sure everyone sees enough floppy nethers after each jump. We don't need to know anything about them other that the promise that you'll find a towel posthaste. Thank you in advance.

(ooc: threadjacking heavily encouraged! it'd be fun to have people find common interests or things to relate to, and I just wanted a kinda free-for-all for the S.S. Solemn Worrywarts)

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Whatever Jake's got in his locker... and I think space soap operas in the media library. I figure we're due any day now for a massive group watch of The Wizard of Oz to really tweak out the Ren Faire, but Jake usually organizes those kinds of things.

Seriously though, we do. Pirates, alleged red smiley faces, fuckin' creeper monsters out there--this place needs a good movie night. I know we gotta focus as much as the next guy, but if we don't have movie nights, there could be grave consequences on our psyches.

...

Even worse ones.

It would definitely trigger the inevitable space crazy early. That's my totally serious medical opinion.

I'm not a doctor or scientist or anything remotely medical, but I agree 100%!

Besides, if something's aiming to kill us down the road, at least we'll get some good flick nights in.

Something will always be aiming to kill us, mon frere. That's our life now. We just mosey on along and avoid wearing too much red.

Hey, hey, nothing's trying to kill me right now. Then again, my idea of danger is a little fucked as of late. As in, I feel better and comparatively safer when something isn't screeching at me or trying to impale me.

Edited 2013-05-18 09:49 (UTC)

I'm used to office settings where the occasional psychopath and hostile takeovers are my only open door into the danger zone. And then I came here and I just embraced my new life as a lovable side character in a space horror film.

It pretty much goes "is something trying to eat my face now? No? Check back in ten minutes."

Edited 2013-05-20 16:47 (UTC)

Um — be careful with that shit. Being a lovable side character in a horror movie might get you killed, remember? At least be self-aware and all that. Tell everyone not to go into the shadows. Or split up. Or anything else fucking stupid to do.

[TRUST HIM ON THIS ONE

IF HE'D TRIED HARDER, THEY WOULDN'T HAVE READ THE FUCKIN' LATIN.]

[Topher laughs in a mockingly condescending way.] Oh come on. You must really think I'm some kind of amateur. I saw Scream forty times. I got this, bro.

I even screen my calls to avoid the mouthbreathing creeper with the voice changer shtick.

Oh man, Scream was a good one. Life lessons at a young age, right there.

We got mouthbreathers around here? I've been too busy freaking over spaceships and pirates and all that fun shit to really notice.

[Topher pauses. He mouthbreathes. Not like in a creepy way, but you know, in a very "fuck I'm a mouthbreather" sort of way. So... That was sort of dumb.]

Not that I've noticed. And we do have a lot of attractive ladies and co-ed showers. You'd think the creepers would be obvious.

[It's okay man he'll pretend that wasn't dumb at all.

He's a bro like that.]

Maybe because all of the women on this ship could easily beat their asses into submission.

I'm only guessing that's the reason.

It's actually really true. Even the tiny mute one is scary in a quiet stab-you-in-the-neck sorta way... And I mean the blonde tiny mute one. Chell is terrifying in general. And less tiny.

[Pause]

...And that's the tiny blonde mute one without wings. Geez, how many mute girls do we even have?

Edited 2013-05-30 20:16 (UTC)

I dunno! I only met one so far. The one with wings. She's a good kid.

As in, I don't think she stabs people in the necks.

I could be wrong about that.

It's always the ones you don't expect.

Isn't it, though? Like the quiet guy in big-ass reading glasses who works in cubicles. you never expect him to be the serial killer.

And the day we find her standing in the corridors looking like the very literal angel of death... know that I called it.

I will. I'll write it on the wall in my own blood before she gets me, like a crappy B-Movie.

It'll say "Topher called it."

And everyone'll know what I meant.

Definitely fits in with the ship's ambiance.

Just be careful, the scientists always have a shitty time in these situations. If you get my meaning.

[you know

how scientists die 90% of the time in sci-fi thrillers]

If something starts going wonky in a test tube, run for the hills.

Technically, the scientists already bit it. I've seen the bloodstains where the hellbeasts live. It ain't pretty.

... Right.

The whole... weird hallways thing. With that lab. Right?

[He hasn't seen any of this shit, just read. A lot.]

I see you've done the required reading.

I mighta' been a slacker in school, but I know what's important to study when finals are closing in.

I'm actually glad I wasn't around for most of this, even if it makes it hard to visualize. Sounds like you guys had a real gay ol' time.

Blood, dying, screaming. [He exhales sharply.] Real Love Boat, this ship.

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foolproofed - 2013-06-09 08:20 (UTC) - Expand