001; the most optimistic newb you will ever meet. (video; open)

[assumedposition]

[ There's a boy on your video feed. Or more accurately: an intense close-up of his face, like he's inspecting it without realising it's turned on. But then before you know it, he leans back with an excited victory whoop. ]

Whoa! I got it working!

[ Now you can see more of him: he doesn't look to be any older than sixteen, but he's dressed in what are unmistakably fine clothes-- a collared shirt, a cravat, a jacket, etc. Even the patterned material is obviously opulent. ]

Man, these things are really ancient... --oh. Sorry. Talking to myself. Where are my manners? I'm Albert...

[ He trails off quite suddenly, as if he were about to say something else after his first name, but then thought the better of it. It's also noticeable that he pronounces it in the French way, "Al-bear", without the t. ]

Anyway! I'm making this video because I was hoping one of the kind citizens of this place could direct me in the way of food! French cuisine is preferred, but I'm not particularly picky. Hunger is the greatest sauce, or something like that.

Although-- now that I think about it, I don't... actually have any money? Oh, goodness. That was silly of me. I'm sorry, maybe just forget the whole thing.

[ He has the decency to look slightly sheepish. ]

In any case, since I'm under the impression that we're all sort of in this place together until we can manufacture an escape plan, I'm looking forward to the opportunity to meet everyone soon. I hope we'll be good friends!

Comments

[twitterpate]

Listen to you, breaking poor Steve Jobs's heart one syllable at at ime.

And I'm plenty attached to my phone, thank you-- Wait, your name is Albert?

[assumedposition]

[ He nods ]

That's right. I apologise for not introducing myself earlier-- I was a little preoccupied, I suppose.

[twitterpate]

Happens all the time. One minute you're thrashing out of pod, the next you're making friends with equally distraught strangers.

It's Alex.

[assumedposition]

[ An awkward laugh at that. ]

Yes, well, you'll have to understand if I'm not so keen on adding that particular experience to my list of things I'd like to do again.

Alex. It's nice to meet you, formally. Is that short for anything?

[twitterpate]

Alexandra Millar, but we don't talk about that.

And I'm sure no one's adverse to feeding you, money or not. We're stuck here. Being expected to pay is just barbaric.

[assumedposition]

Really? Why not? Alexandra is a beautiful name.

[ There's not even a hint of flirting in his voice. If you search his face for any sign of insincerity, you won't find a single drop. ]

I wouldn't say barbaric, but it does rather make you wonder where the food is coming from, doesn't it?

[twitterpate]

Too many consonants and syllables. It makes it easier for others to bellow at you.

[Good move, Albert. She's flattered.]

Maybe it's a ration system.

[assumedposition]

[ He laughs. ]

I can't say I'm familiar with that experience. Albert is only two syllables, after all, and quite hard to elongate. But very well, I'll stick to Alex.

And that would make slightly more sense, wouldn't it?

[twitterpate]

Someone'd do a good job of it if they were mad at you enough.

Now, let's a make a deal. [She's long gotten over the shock of being seen, even on phone.]

[assumedposition]

A deal? What kind of deal?

[twitterpate]

You find chocolate, yous save some for me.

[assumedposition]

[ That gets a small laugh ]

All right. That's a deal I think I can keep to.

[twitterpate]

I knew I'd find a kindred spirit in you. [Mind you, she doesn't bring up her part of the deal.]

[assumedposition]

I like chocolate well enough, but it's not my favourite, so I don't mind.

Though, if you find any truly fine cheeses...

[twitterpate]

A food connoisseur, aren't you? I'll keep an eye out for the smelly stuff, and I won't tell anyone.

[assumedposition]

What can I say? I'm French. Guilty as charged.

[twitterpate]

French, now! [Alex leans as forward as she could on one fist, propping the device up with her free hand.] Talk to me like I'm one of your French girls.

[assumedposition]

[ Whoosh. That's the sound of something going right over Albert's head. He tilts his head slightly, confused. ]

... Huh?

[twitterpate]

It's something on my bucket list: being wooed in France. But we're not in France, so this is the next best thing.

[assumedposition]

[ ... Oh. Oh. At that, Albert blushes intensely and looks down. ]

... I-- sorry, I-- I already have a... someone. Though, you are most definitely very beautiful.

[twitterpate]

You could have just said that in French! It's not like I speak it, lover boy.

[assumedposition]

What...? We are speaking French. Are we not?

[twitterpate]

...No?

Oui? Oui, oui. Bien sur what have you.

[assumedposition]

[ Oh my goodness, no. He can't help it-- he cracks up laughing. ]

[twitterpate]

That's better be French laughter there!