ataraxion | ╰xx5╮[video]

[ Bet everyone on the network has missed this pretty face, right? He's not in his room this time, however. In fact, he's kind of roaming around the halls. So, the video is a little shaky. ]

You know, there's something about all this I really don't get. So much attachment can't be good for anyone on this boat. It's the same whenever there's a jump, and most of the time, we're not all that lucky anyway. Half the people we know leave and some we don't replace 'em.

I dunno why I think it's ever gonna be different. Maybe I'm just that optimistic. [ Yeah, he's kind of lost another friend. Even if he's gained one from before, it doesn't seem to keep him from going down a path he really shouldn't be going down. A shake of his head, and he's frowning. ] And another thing—

Dying happens. It's that whole natural process whatever that comes with the being mortal thing. The best you can hope for is ending up somewhere better than here. [ Bells sounds frustrated now, the sigh he gives distracting him from what else he'd been about to say. ] This is boring as fuck. I'm getting tired of waiting and the same stuff always happening.

Who's exactly doing who a favor around here anyway? Can't be a decent guard if there's shit protecting us. Now that's something to think about, huh?

[ And with a grimace, the feed abruptly ends there. Feel free to bump into him on his way to the OG. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Believe it or not, I don't think it's really fair if you end up dead without a fighting chance. [ He lifts a shoulder in response to that. ] But hey. If you think you know everything, be my guest.

Oh, what, like you know so much about this ship?

[ Hey maybe he can goad this guy into telling him something useful... or something...? ]

Not really. But I know more than you do right now. [ He can push all he wants; Bells is just going to push back. It's something he likes to do anyway. Eventually, he comes to a slight clearing and promptly sits on the grass, stretches his legs out before patting the spot next to him. ] Have a seat.

[ Still a bit distrustful, a bit frustrated, and a lot impatient now, he sits with his feet tucked under him and just looks at Bells expectantly. ]

[ And Bells looks right back at him. ]

You've got to learn to relax. Or you're never gonna last long here.

[ He could flip a table right now. ]

Seriously? Sorry I don't feel like relaxing on this deathtrap.

I don't mean to the point you don't care. You can't just go around acting like that and expect people to be nice to you. [ Bells points a finger at him. ] Mind your own business. That's another thing.

It won't do you any good to do what those dead people did.

I don't plan on dying here, I can learn from other people's mistakes. And I don't need people to be nice to me. [ Okay that's a lie. ]

You're so full of it. [ And he just laughs. ] Try telling that to someone who might actually believe you when you say that.

[ He opens his mouth to respond, but infuriatingly enough, everything he can come up with ("what makes you think I'm lying," or possibly just "I don't") only seems to prove Bells' point. ]

Fine. Believe what you want.

I usually do. [ And he might happen to sound a little too smug when he speaks. ] Anyway, like I said. You're better off not getting attached here. They're just gonna turn around and disappear when you're not paying attention.

Well, if no one's nice to me, that's not going to be a problem, is it? [ Like it's obvious. He settles back on his feet a little more, still ready to jump up at a moment's notice but a little less tense. ]

People die and people leave, it's gonna happen wherever you go. You just have to get used to it.

I'm used to that enough. Hell's not exactly the kinda place for things like that anyway. [ He pauses, giving him a look before glancing up and sighing. ] Being here does something to you though. It's fucking stupid.

"Does something to you"? [ He's choosing to focus on that instead of the Hell part. Hey, if he's spacefuck nowhere and there was a golem on this ship it's really not a reach to think someone on this ship might be from Hell. ] This doesn't really seem like the kind of place that'll make you care about anything.

It's complicated. [ Which is true. He's been trying so damn hard not to get involved with anyone, but that's...not really working out for him. Being off the drugs isn't helping him with that either. ] Look. I don't really care what you do. But you shouldn't wander off or do anything reckless. It'll just cause too much trouble.

How many people are here who care about you anyway? Think about that.

[ He never really stopped thinking about it. It's been hovering in the back of his mind since he got here, a constant unpleasant awareness that he's utterly isolated from everyone he knows. ]

And you told me to stop being a dick. Okay, I'm not an idiot, I've heard "don't wander off" at least once a day since I got here, and we already went over how I'm not planning on dying here so you don't have to worry about that inconvenience.

[ He gets to his feet, arms crossed. He said he'd leave if this guy didn't tell him anything useful, and he's been waiting long enough. ] I can take care of myself. And if it turns out I can't, no loss for you or anyone else on the ship.

[ He squints up at him, hand in his hair. How much more useful can he get than everything he's already told him? After a second, there's only a half shrug. ]

That's a fucking poor attitude to have. Someone might miss you. [ A breath. ] Maybe someone's missing you already.

[ It all seems like common sense to Greg: don't wander off, don't do anything stupid, don't die, don't get attached. He shrugs back. ]

Well, sorry I have a poor attitude, then. But no one here knows me enough to miss me.

╰xx5╮[video]

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